Another Day Another Slime

If your' new check out all the Slime Samples and info below.
It's the weekend, I'm going to heat my java and watch the Americans lost the Ryder Cup but there's always time for.....

Worst Birthday EVER!!

-Anonymous
Ok, my husband of 11 years had planned a surprise birthday party at our cabin for the weekend.
Very happy, very blissful marriage.
A very happy birthday party and he invited all of our friends, he had flown them into this place. And we were all having a gay old time. MUCH LIKE THE FLINSTONES.
Me and a bunch of boring people. I thought it was a nice idea. I looked at my new watch he had just got me. This beautiful new longines with beautiful diamonds and gold.
SOUNDS LIKE A DECENT GUY, SURPRISE PARTY, BIG EXPENSIVE WATCH AND THEN…
Loser. So I miss him for about a half an hour. So I looked at my watch after about a half an hour and I missed him. Looked at my watch again and thought…this is really, really strange. I better go see if I can find him. So I looked around and I end up going into one of the rooms we use as a guest room. And I couldn’t open that door. Then I went to the other side and that door was still locked and I thought… There’s only one other way in there: Through the screen. So I put my through the screen, and lo and behold, what do I see when I look in there? My husband with my best girlfriend…NOT FOR LONG.
That’s not the half of it! Well, they were going at it. Anyhow, he looks up at me with those far away eyes and say…– “It’s not what you think Hon, it’s not what you think!”
I said what the heck is it then? RESEARCH MAYBE?
They just laid there. So I get very, very angry. And I took this gorgeous watch that this loser had brought me and I ran as fast as I could to the lake and I threw it in the lake. And all he could say was, “It’s not insured! It’s not insured!” Loser. Major loser.

THE SLIME THAT MEN DO