August 2007 Archives

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Blogging about Blogging. Now this is Profound!

Posted by Humble on August 31, 2007 @ 09:20 | Permalink

Long weekend and then what.

Usually at this time of year I'd be all gung-ho to get the Fall book started. For you non-radio types, the Fall BBM period begins Tuesday and goes for a couple of months. It's the most important ratings survey of the year as a good portion of advertising dough is up for grabs and a lot of it is based on the numbers that come out of this survey.
This year I won't be part of it again.
Last year I was still shell-shocked from being canned but this year I'm actually a bit sad/jealous/nostalgic to be on the sidelines.

I'm asked all the time of I miss being on the Radio and most of the time I don't. I miss being part of a creative team working on things that will hopefully increase the ratings. Or at the very least, amuse ourselves.

Make sure you check out the AirShow this weekend it's going to be awesome.
I hope you have a great last-long-weekend-of-summer and play safe.
See you back here Tuesday.
h

Category: HumbleStuff

Posted by Humble on August 31, 2007 @ 09:09 | Permalink

I know the PGA Tour is trying. They really are. It's just i don't think the whole Fed EX Cup thing is causing the buzz they had hoped for.
I'm not hearing a lot of "Wow, Stricker's in first place?"
The only thing people were talking about last week is why wasn't Tiger playing. (Cause mathematically he didn't have to. Oops.)

I don't know anyone that even remotely understands the thing entirely and the only thing my friends are asking me is can I explain it.
Barely.
I summed it up the best I could here so if your curious have a look.

For me the best thing is that El Tigre will most likely play the next three weeks in a row and will probably win once, finish second, finish top 5 and win the Fed Ex Cup despite not giving a crap about it.
The tour will likely tweak the format for next year,Fed Ex will throw in a gazillion more dollars
and Tiger will most likely win it again.

My pal Tim (going back to school) Miller sent me this. This is for those dudes who have to have some amphib-fun.

This came from Tom Roberts. I love this stuff he sends me, it's either chicks or man humour or both.
This a funny beer commercial from Rolling Rock.

This is my 9 year old Spencer.
She doesn't like her name.
She likes to sing and watch TV and read Harry Potter books and annoy her big sister.
She plays house-league soccer and has about the greatest laugh I've ever heard.
She's not the most athletic kid but as it turns out she does have a VERY GOOD golf swing.
Must be genetic.

Up until last night we've only ever just hit balls on a range. She's learned through imitation and some instruction. She whiffs a lot, but when she hits it, it goes.
We played a little par three course near the house and on the first tee we get paired up with a couple of 20 year old dudes.
I say we'll pick up her ball if she is slowing things down.

So Spencer gets up on the first tee with her driver, 110 yards from the hole and just whacks the shite out of it.
High, soft, draw, pin-high right.
The dude's jaws drop. I beam with pride. Spencer looks at me with that kid-grin that says, "Howd you like that Pop?"

4 holes later she got a blister that popped and we had to stop, but I'll never forget that first tee shot and neither will she.
She says she can't wait to go back and that's the best a Dad can hope for.

BTW. This is exactly the kind of story I miss being able to tell my Dad. He would have loved to hear it and he would have loved the way she swings a club.

For reasons I have discussed earlier (I'm a big Dad-Suck) my daughters convinced me to take them to Sherway Gardens Mall yesterday.
Wow.
I don't know if you non Dad-Sucks know about this but these three stores(Hollister, Abercrombie and Fitch, American Eagle) are part of some weird cult that wants you to have their name on everything you wear.

They are dark, noisy, hot, places, that are filled with tweens and teens trying on 34 dollar halter's.
I sat and read the paper.
I sat and read a magazine.
I sat and waited and got all whoozy.
My Daughters loved it. They stood in line at Hollister for more than half an hour to pay!
I nodded off.
At one point I had to call my wife to see if a top was "well-priced" and to make sure my 9 year old wasn't trying to hose me.

In the end it was a great Daddy-Daughter outing and that's all that mattered. We hung out, had some frothy drinks and cookies and then went home.
The girls thought I did well for my first time.
Daddy had to have a lay down.

The reaction to the Miss America contestant has been fast and furious. Not only here at Hhdotcom, but in the mainstream media and the YouTube.
I guess YT is pretty mainstream too.
Have a look at this not-so-stupid American.

This is YouTube video all the kids are talking about.
Why can't a fifth of Americans locate the US on a world map?
Here's your answer.

These must be the dog days.
I have no idea why their called that. I suppose I could Google it but I'm too lazy.
My wife is at the CNE today with her friend Sharyl. I would rather have hot coal rubbed on my eyeballs.
I haven't been to the CNE in years but Randee loves it for reason's I can't explain.
The whole place smells like a giant fart to me.

So, the other chicks I live with, aged 12 and 9, are taking me back to school shopping at Sherway.
Why I agreed to this should be a warning to you other Fathers of Daughters out there. In a moment of Daddy-weakness I said yes.
Now I'll be dragged in and out of little-Girl stores all day looking for "Tops" and "Hair-bands" and other chick-junk. The only saving grace is the odd Hot Mom sighting. And the inevitable after-shopping ice cream.

I have no job. I have no job prospects.
I have a couple of things that are getting close and I am anxious to be able to tell you. Some of my pals that read this drivel every day know what I'm talking about but I'd like to be able to tell you Hhdotcom Regular Readers.
I will say that the one thing that's about to close is one of those long shots that could be huge. Or not.
It is it's exciting.
It's not Radio.
Right now Radio seems like something I use to do and I'm not sure I'll do again.
Who knows.
Maybe I should have gone to the CNE and tried to get a gig at the Whack-a-Mole booth.
I would if the whole place didn't smell like ass.

I found this dude Bobby Eldridge who's got a system called PurePoint Golf Instruction. I wrote about him a few weeks ago and you know what, I think he's got some good, simple stuff to say about the golf swing.
Today BE's very simple way to cure your slice. Yes you have a slice, I know you do.
Now stop it already.

Try to keep your leading shoulder "down" on the ball through
impact. This is called staying strong through impact. Lots of times
the leading shoulder (left shoulder if right handed) flies up
before impact. Now just for a minute, think about what that does to
the club head when it's in the impact zone.

Golf is all about thinking and analyzing your shots to get better.
A huge part of this game is understanding "why" you're getting a
certain result, and the physics behind that result. Thinking
through your golf swing will provide huge dividends if you're
willing to invest the time it takes.

Get up from the computer and actually go though the motions slowly.
Let your leading shoulder fly up as you approach impact and you'll
actually be able feel and see the clubface coming from an
outside-in path. That causes a slice every time.

So what can you do to correct it? Well, for starters, try to learn
to keep your leading shoulder strong. Keep that shoulder "down" on
the ball all the way through impact, even after the ball is gone
and flying straight down the fairway.

So even though it may seem like the leading shoulder is higher than the
trailing shoulder, it's still facing the ball at impact. NOT TOWARDS THIRD
BASE in comparison to the ball. That would mean that you have let the
leading shoulder fly up.

Every so often some peeps check in here at Hhdotcom and I must say it's nice to hear from the nice people.
Carlos Benevides from DAVE Fm wrote in.

Hey Howard,
I haven't been to your site for awhile, (I know, wha's my problem?) but I stopped in tonight and I just wanted you to know how enjoyable it is everytime I check it out. Hope you and the family are well. Hope to see you at Luby's tourney in a few weeks. And looking forward to your "sort of" new radio venture.
Carlos
Thanks Carlos I hope to see you and your Half-Mexican self there too.

Hi Howard,
Just want to say that I miss you and Fred terribly. I absolutely loved the Mix morning show hosted by you, it was a great kickstart to my day. I honestly cannot find a half decent morning show. Nothing out there appeal to me. Are you considering back in the business???
Luv You
Jane
No Jane, I love you.

Hey Humble,
I just listened to your Podcast of Love today. Yes, it's August and I just found the podcast yesterday. I'm a Canadian citizen, born in Hong Kong, and now living in Ningbo, China. I used to be your show's loyal listener and followed your move to Mix999. I left in August 2005 from Toronto to follow my wife here in Ningbo, and I miss Toronto so much.

And Humble, if you come to China to do an exclusively book signing in Ningbo for me, I'll sooooo buy your book to read what SLIME means and treat you to some Chinese slimes....actual slimes, I think they eat that in Guangzhou! :-D
Thanks!
James Cheung
Thanks James I would love to come to China for some Slime.

My wife's cousin Suzie sent us this link and I found it on YouTube as well.
This kids is going to be very popular at parties when he grows up.

Hey Hhdotcom peeps. I have to spend the bulk of the day downtown and so the drivel will be delayed.
Not sure what time I'll be back to deliver so check back 3, 4, 5 times a day.
And watch for Traffic and Weather together on the ones.
"Looks like today will be nice and traffic will suck!"
Enjoy.

We went to the St.Lawrence Market and stumbled into Busker Fest. Very cool, very non-Oakville.
We saw a man named Dynamite juggle machetes on top of a ten-foot uni-cycle. You don't see that a lot in the 905!

We bought a rack of lamb and barbecued it. It was okay, but I don't have to eat it again anytime soon.
Also bought some Thrills gum. Do you remember Thrills? Little blue-squares that are packed with flavor for about the first 5 seconds and then nothing.
Yes they still taste like soap. Maybe that's why they call them Thrills.
"Hey wanna have the fun of chewing soap without all the fuss and muss of actually chewing soap?"

I think I broke my toe. A few weeks ago while docking a boat, I jammed one of my toes between the boat and the dock. Hurt like a bitch.
Anyway, on Saturday I jammed/stubbed into the side of my desk so hard I was yelling/laughing/nearly crying all at the same time.
It has to be broken. I may need a transplant.

Finally, Tucker the Dog, took another whiz on a pair of my shorts again.
Why Tucker, why?
We wake up, I put him out, I let him in, he pee's on my shorts.
Not just a little either. The whole, "haven't peed for nearly 11 hours" pee.
For a little dog he holds a lot of whiz.
Maybe I should wash his mouth out with Thrills.

I saw both the Nanny Diaries and Mr. Bean this past weekend, part of the "What can we take our kids to?" festival.
Let me just say that they are both very fine movies with a few differences.
The Nanny Diaries has Scarlett Johansen and Mr. Bean does not.
Although Rowan Atkinson is one of my favorite comic-genius-dudes, he is not however Scarlett Johansen.
Mr. Bean is a cute, somewhat funny fable about a nitwit who mixes every thing up and goes on capers.
The Nanny Diaries is the story of a nanny or something that stars the very delicious SJ.
If Mr.Bean had featured Scarlett Johansen it would have been a much better movie.
They are both good kid-flicks.
One has Mr. Bean. One has Scarlett.
You do the math.

Years ago I got to know this dude Vinay Menon after he wrote by far the best Humble and Fred newspaper piece. He's a decent guy and an amazing writer.
He's one of the reasons I buy The Star, that and the hot chicks.
Anyway, I thought I'd turn you on to some of his stuff from today's paper. No this isn't just some lazy-ass way to cut and paste some content into my blog.
Okay, maybe some of that, but I do like his writing.

The fourth is answered outright: angels wear plaid and grubby T-shirts, sport rocker mullets circa 1978, speak with a Dixie drawl, freely traverse the space-time continuum, boast glowing Pegasus-style wings and, oh yes, crack indolently while chewing tobacco.
At least, that would describe Earl (Leon Rippy), a most improbable seraph. (Improbable unless you were watching a show called Dirt Road to Heaven or Touched By a Hillbilly.)
Earl is what's known in the celestial biz as a "Last Chance Angel." The sinner who is getting this last chance is Grace Hanadarko (Holly Hunter), a police detective who spends her non-sleuthing time smoking, boozing, swearing, brawling and cavorting with married men.

Blogging is what it is.
A new Media, communication, entertainment, a way for washed-up Radio guys to feel their still part of The Bigger Picture.
I enjoy it.
I hope you enjoy some of the drivel I pump out here from time to time.

I have no idea what impact my day to day rambling has, but a year after I started Hhdotcom I still like doing it.
Maybe not as much as before.
Maybe the novelties worn off.
Maybe.
Anyway here's another Blog cartoon I found and liked.
Have a great and safe weekend.

You may have heard they are pondering the notion of re-naming a stretch of the 401 the "Highway of Heroes" to honor the Canadians that have died in the service of our country. This is the very definition of a no-brainer.
This is from CTV.ca...
A section of Canada's busiest highway might be renamed the Highway of Heroes to honour the path fallen soldiers take from Canadian Forces Base Trenton to the coroner's office in Toronto.
Ontario Premier Dalton McGuinty said he will consider an online petition asking the Ministry of Transportation to change Highway 401's name.

Really. He'll consider it. How big of you DM.
Listen the only downside is that the Liberals will somehow make some political hay out of this. Whatever.
There have been too many trips from Trenton to Toronto carrying dead soldiers, calling that trail the Highway of Heroes is the least we can do.
No discussion.

We are dam lucky to live in this area.
Great city, decent climate, lot's of hot chicks and next week a bunch of cool planes will be flying around.
Does it get any better?

I've been involved peripherally with the CIAS (Canadian International Airshow) for the last couple of months, I'm on the board of directors which pretty much boils to a few meetings and some childish discourse. Right up my alley!
My real involvement has been through one of my best pals DW, he of the Freakishly Giant Brain. DW is responsible for booking many of the acts that will be performing next weekend.
People, if you like planes your going to love this years show. Yes I know there have been planes there in the past but this year is going to kick ass.

The Snowbirds of course, a CF-18 flown by a Toronto dude who graduated from Seneca, a Corsair, aerobatic she-devil Patty Wagstaff and for the very first time landing at an non-US airport the F-22 Raptors-they will give you a boner.
(If you can't wait check out this YouTubery.)

I'm having a terrible time with my allergies this week.
What the hell's going on? Usually by this time of the year I'm done, but lately it's as though I'm under attack.
I sneeze like a crazy bastard too.
Achoo, achoo, achoo. I sneeze in threes. I pause and then another three-pack of sneezes.
My kids think my Achoo's are too loud.
I may play them up for effect.
I'll be happy when the sneeze season is done.

Well after a summer of fun and frivolity I won't be going back on the air anytime soon.
Sorry.
I thought I was but it went from full stall mode to uh, "...we're going in a different direction.."
It's a long, complicated story that I will tell you one day, but for the foreseeable future I'll just be talking to myself and the dog.
I could be wrong but I don't think so.

I have made an interesting deal on another project that I'm also unable to talk about but it is very interesting and I would love for it to go forward.
I'll reveal that as soon as I can.
I will say it is TV and it involves some very big breathers who produce some very big shows.

I'm am going to start beating the bushes for some other stuff to keep me busy, if you need someone to run some errands for you during the day, I'm your guy.
Today is bad though, as I'm heading downtown to get my haircut. Spencer thinks I'm starting to look like the Clown "Roundabout" from East Side Marios's.
Hmm maybe their hiring.!

A couple of Augusts ago I found myself alone on the air and in need of a new friend. I called around the Radio station until I found Carl the IT guy. It was quite a discovery as Carl was a nice guy who seemed to want to be my pal.
Our friendship lasted 3 episodes and thanks to Rusty P I'm able to play them for you hear.
Enjoy.
Episode 1 Carl and I are still friendly.

I was looking at some shots of the cottage today and I thought I'd be even more self-indulgent than usual and show off some of my favorite pics.
A couple of the girls and then one of an amazing sky over the lake.

Charlie looking way too mature!

I was perusing the Boon site as I am want to do. In between checking out pgatour.com and porn, I usually wander over to see what Toronto Mike is up to.
Apparently I'm not alone and the numbers are growing.

I dig the Mike man and If you haven't done it before go join the millions and check it out now.
Then of course come back here.

For someone that surfs the YouTube as much as I do, you'd think I would have posted something by now. Well today I have.

It all started with Tuckers latest haircut. The groomer lady said that we'd have to shave him again because of a multitude of matted areas that would be too painful to try and comb out.
He's been in the water a lot this summer so his hair is all clumpy.
Yes I know the kids are supposed to brush him but good luck with that. They were supposed to walk him everyday and pick up his crap but we're still waiting for that to happen.

Anyway, this morning I was taking some pictures to show you his latest bizarre haircut and I figured I'd film him instead.
So here he is Hhdotcom peeps, Tucker the Dog in his first YouTube appearance.
I put my hand into the shot for a second so you can see how small he really is.
Enjoy.

Today for the 3rd year in a row the nice people at the Toronto Ronald McDonald House have asked me to host their annual golf tourney. It is a great organization and a fun event.
Last year, a young boy who had cancer and had stayed at the house for nearly a year, spoke eloquently and emotionally about what the organization had meant to him and there wasn't a dry eye in the place.
It's a good group and great cause and I'm happy to help out and make my stupid comments and give away the prizes.
For more on this nice bunch go here.

Hi golfers.
Hi Howard.
It's been a while since I posted any golf tips so here's a quick one I came across.
Theres' this dude name Bobby Eldridge who's got a system called PurePoint Golf Instruction.
When I first came across him I thought he was just another internet huckster, but after checking out his stuff I must say it's pretty good. He's all over YouTube if you want to see him instruct live or you can go to his site PurePointGolf.com.

As for the picture above. It's a great way to illustrate what happens on the backswing/follow through in very simple terms.
Going back,your right arm shortens up, and on your follow through the same applies to your left arm. I know it seems strange, but if you try this next time your at the range you will see some amazing results.
Go.
Enjoy.

What an ass. Pleads guilty to the charges of organizing a dog-fighting ring and for what?
What could he possibly gain from doing this? Nothing.
What could he lose? Well he's going to lose everything. Half of his 130 million contract, about 20 million of his 30 plus signing bonus and most of all his entire career and credibility.
And for what.
What an ass. Plead guilty and now go f-away.

I've put up some Tete a Claques before. It's quit the phenomena from Quebec.
According to my nephew Karl Tete a Claques means a "Head that's good for smacking!"
I have one of those.
It's truly funny and this weekend my pal Julie told me about another hysterical episode Le Willi Waller.
Check out the site here...like the other nearly 1 million visitors a day.
For a bit of Tete a Claques teaser watch this.
Very bizarre and funny, even if you don't speak French.

God asks Arnie first: "What do you believe?" Arnie thinks long and hard, looks God in the eye, and says, "I believe in hard work, and in staying true to family and friends. I believe in giving. I was lucky, but I always tried to do right by my fans." God can't help but see the essential goodness of Palmer, and offers him a seat to his left.

For the third year in a row 3 of my best pals and their wives got together for a night of debauchery,dancing and non-stop laughter.
Sort of the Bill Chill redux with jokes.
It's a chance for all four of us, who've known each other since we were 18, to get together and see how badly we're aging!
Funny our wives look great-but dam we're getting old.
Just kidding.
Actually it is always fun to hang out and talk about the old days when we were all intro-ing songs and trying to make a living.

In the three years since we started this tradition we're definitely slowing down. The first couple of years no one could remember much about the night before, cept the fire, skinning dipping, house-dancing and some inadvertent french-kissing.
This year there was no fire, no skinny-dipping and I only frenched my own wife. Although I did receive a very nice neck rub from one of my friends wives.

In the end we go our separate ways and in the blink of an eye a year goes by and we'll do it all again.
That's really the most bizarre thing about this get together, not only seeing one another getting older, but also how quickly that 12 months evaporates.
Next year the first of our group will turn 50!
Soon this party will start at noon and dinner will be served at 4:30 and then we'll watch the news and go to bed.
I'm betting it'll still be filled with laughter.

A few of my pals who consider me their PGA Tour expert, because of the gay amount of time I spend watching it and Tiger, have asked me to explain the new playoff format to determine the winner of the inaugural FedEx Cup.

It's fairly complex but I'll put it this way simply.
Tiger will most likely win it.
Tiger doesn't really give 2 shites about it.

Basically it's like the Nextel Cup in Nascar.
All season long you play for position and then for the last four tournaments your seeded based on your season's performance.
So if you finish first, your given top points and so on down to 144 for the last 4 weeks.
Each week some players are eliminated and then the person with the most points at the end, wins the cup and a 10 million deferred payment. (Too hard to explain.)

You may have heard that the PGA tour is pissed at Tiger for skipping the first of the four events.
I guess so. It's their first kick at this and him not playing is not good.
The problem is he can miss the first event and mathematically still be leading the playoffs.
This little numerical glitch is just the kind of the thing the Tour was hoping to avoid.
Check this out for more.
Then of course, come back.

Friday night the kids were watching High School Musical 2. (Zak is so dreamy!) I
opted out and went to see SuperBad.
Wow.
It's by far the funniest movie I've been at for a long while.

Seth Rogan is that dude from 40 year old virgin and knocked up and he wrote this picture with his buddy Evan when he was 13.
The theatre was packed and it got so many laughs that many of the next lines were drowned out. I haven't experience that for some time.
I will say this. It's vulgar, juvenille and immature, so mostly it's a guy flick. But there's lots of laughs in there for both of your sexes.
Here's an unedited trailer.

If you have time, check out this interview with Seth Rogan. How old did you think he was?

I hung out with my old friend John Verdon last night, the genius behind the Lakeport success,(Great beer, fair prices!)
He's got a full scale bar in his basement and I saw it for the first time. It's amazing.
Some people finish their basement and put in a bar and a pool table but Johns actually made it look exactly like a functioning bar. Very cool.
He's no longer with Lakeport but I know he'll be up to something soon, he's a bright boy.
In the meantime he's another out-of-work Dad in the neighborhood.

Tonight is a big deal around here. It's High School Musical 2.
If you've never heard of this chances are your kids are grown up or under 5.
Disney made this sappy little movie a couple of years ago and it turned into a phenomena.
All the little girls love it.

It's about a boy and girl from two different sides of the school clique system coming together to sing. Oooh dreamy.
Anyway tonight's the sequel and kids all over North America, mine included, are having High School Musical watching parties. Fun.
I'll be in the other room drinking something distilled from potatoes with orange juice.

I haven't posted anything this week about Tiger cause I was up at the cottage.
It was fun watching him win his 13th major and creep ever closer to Jack's record.
Good on Mike Weir getting picked for the President's Cup team. Too bad Stephen Ames made a doody in pants and played his way off.
Have a great weekend and be safe and well.
h

I had several e-mails about me or me and Fred replacing the Jack Fm morning that was gassed this week.
I'm/we're not.
Maybe Fred is. I don't know.
I know that I feel bad for those Ben and Kerry guys cause getting fired sucks.
Here is a look at their funny TV spot.

Shortly after midnight Elvis returns to Graceland from a late-night visit to the dentist. Through the early morning of the 16th he takes care of last minute tour details and relaxes with family and staff. He is to fly to Portland, Maine that night and do a show there on the 17th, then continue the scheduled tour. He retires to his master suite at Graceland around 7:00 AM to rest for his evening flight. By late morning, Elvis Presley is dead of heart failure. It is announced by mid-afternoon. In a matter of hours the shock registers around the world.

Elvis died about 6 weeks after I started in Radio.
I was 17.

I was working weekends at CHAB Moose Jaw reading the news and hanging around the other 5 days a week trying to figure out how this whole thing worked.
I remember our PD Don West who actually gave me the name Humble, was very upset and went into full Elvis Tribute mode right away. People loved it.

Don was an old guy,(35!) and a big Elvis fan and we put our station into Elvis overdrive.
It was a pretty big deal for me, someone who had been in high school 7 weeks before, to witness the kind of immediacy and power that Radio could have and provide.
I was never an Elvis fan but I learned then what kind of impact he had. It was the same 3 years later when I was doing all-nights in Vancouver the night that Lennon was shot.

When I think about Elvis in the summer of 1977 now I remember that time in Radio.
I'm more than a little freaked out though that I'm now 10 years older than my "old guy" boss was 30 years ago.

HAG, those are my initials. My middle name is Allen, though I'm not sure how it's spelled. I know it's on my birth certificate, it could just as easily be Allan. I'm too lazy to go and check.

Charlie had a soccer game the other night in Brampton at Chingcouzy park. Oh my goodness what an amazing facility.
Football, Baseball, Track, Tennis, Swimming, Soccer all in one location.
I've never seen anything like it. It blew me away. I'd heard about it over the years from Freddy P but I'd never been until the other night. I wish our community had a place like it, I'm sure all towns do.

As for the game, Oakville won 4-1, including a nice goal from Charlie G and our girls were told to F-off and given the finger by more than one parent on the Brams side. Nice.
One girl was threatened by a parent and most of the other kids were verbally abused at one time or another.
That also blew me away as I have never seen any other parents of any team we've ever played act like that.
Too bad. Great facility, bad sportsmanship.

45 minutes to change a light bulb. True.
My friend Dan Duran always says that no matter what job your doing around the house, it will always take twice as long to fix as you think.
Well how long does it take to change a light bulb?

1) Attempt to remove old light bulb. Glass part comes off, metal part stays.
2) While trying to turn metal part, chards of burnt bulb rain down around me. Light fixture comes apart.
3) Try and replace fixture, fixture comes off the ceiling.
4) Fixture has two tiny nuts that won't go back in.
5) Finally get fixture back on ceiling and put fixture back together.
6) Put in new bulb, turn light on.
7) Move on with life.

Finally, Randee went to the Beyonce show last night at the ACC and much to my disappointment, did not bring Beyonce home with her.
Damm, now I've gone and waxed my nether-regions for nothing!

Dang I wish I could remember what site I was on when I found this. Sorry, but I'm old and my mind is addled by Tequila.
Have a look at this discussion from New York Entertainment about buddies in movies. Pretty interesting and cool who they think are the best Buddies in Movies of all time.
Check it here.
Then come back.

Seems while Daddy was away some of you kids got into it over the Dixie Chicks entry.
A few HhDotcom-ers were going back and forth over free speech, George W.Bush and the whole Shut up and Sing-thing.
Have a look here. Very interesting what stirs people up.

As for the DC's, vindication is a dish like revenge, better served cold and later. The Chicks have gotten the last laugh on the red-neck southerners who banned their music. They won 5 Grammies, are more popular than ever and 60 plus percent of Americans are now embarrassed that George W is from their home state.

Hey HhDotcom peeps. What up?
I apologize for leaving you drivel-free for these last couple of weeks but I've been Up North.
That always sounds so nebulous to me when people say it but it does cover the subject nicely.

Up North, at a Cottage, Away.
It was 10 days of fun, sun, sticky buns, booze, boats and water.
I was gone so long I forgot what I did for a living. Then I remembered. Oh yeah, nothing!
Anyway, I'm back and I don't have anything to announce yet. Sorry. Seems the project is in full stall mode.
I'll let you know as soon as I do.
In the meantime a couple of shots from the Glassman Family Holiday.

"The Babies!"

I never used to get the whole "cottage thing."
For most of my first 13 or 14 summers in Toronto, I hit a lot of golf balls. That was it.
Hit balls, play golf, play tournament, hit more balls.
Then I gave that up and rented a cottage for the first time in 2003.
I was hooked. I love it and look forward to it every summer.
I even wrote about in The National Post.
I'm going up today for the next 10 days so I won't be posting. Sorry. I will have fresh crap for you come the middle of August and I should be able to announce how you'll be able to hear me again on the radio. Sort of.
Have a great couple of weeks and be safe and well.
H

TORONTO NORTH !
For years I used to look sideways at the people who would trek “Up North” every weekend. I thought it was ridiculous to get on the 400 or 401 and leave a perfectly good city to go sit around some lake and get eaten by bugs while cooking burgers outdoors and sleeping in drafty huts. I know I know it’s a tradition around here cause you all grew up going to your grandparents leanto or some Muskoka Camp, but I’m from Moose Jaw and we didn’t really “summer on the lake” as much as we just took a couple month break between snow storms.
Well, I’m in. I’m now officially a Torontonian because I freaking love it up there.
I’ve lived here for 17 years but it wasn’t until about 4 summers ago that I started to slowly assimilate.
We rented a cottage…small cabin, nice lakefront-trees, loons and campfires.
I liked it. My kids loved it. I began to see.
Next summer we rented again, and we visited some friends and stayed overnight at their place. Hey this was fun. Warm days, boating, swimming, checking out little towns, everyone happy and laughing and starting to drink at noon!
“These people couldn’t be from Toronto”, I thought, we don’t act like this a few hours south of here.
That’s the key. We are different when we’re in the big city. “Up North” we don’t have to run at full impulse power, up here we slow down. After the drive that is.
The Drive.
Friday afternoon, the mad dash to get the hell out of town. That’s the part I could never get my head around, but like the rest of the city, I’ve learned to endure.
I used to mock my friends.
“Oh yeah, that sounds great, let’s just park on the 400 for 3 and half hours and then the fun begins?”
Well that was before I became Cottage Boy. Now the drive is just part of the deal and as soon as it’s over and I’m looking out on a lake, it’s forgotten.
Like a lot of you we rent a little place on a lake every year and a few other times a summer we are Cottage Glommers.
You may be unfamiliar with that name but believe me you know the concept. Cottage Glommers are Toronto people who don’t own their own place but Glom onto their friends that do. It’s a real HogTown tradition.
This past weekend we glommed at the family cottage of our friends Stinky and Lou Lou. (Not their real names!) They have a sweet place they share with Lou Lou’s parents Ed and Diane (Their real names) that has been in the Lou Lou family for nearly 80 years. The trick to successful Glomming is to be The PG. That’s the perfect guest to you non-glommers. I’m not completely clear on all the rules but they include not breaking things, bringing your own pillows, cleaning up after yourself and come with plenty of snacks and booze! We had a great time which included Stinky’s amazing ribs, my kids tubing, throwing sticks for his dog Hogan and hours just staring out at the lake.
That’s the part I’m just starting to get. The peacefulness and serenity. Sometimes you can just be sitting on a dock, staring out at nothing and everything at the same time and then it all makes sense. We reside in Toronto for a lot of reasons- the pace, the people the opportunities but every weekend or so we get out of the city and we’re just a bit different. For 48 hours we slow down and become something besides our big city selves. The week’s traffic and deadlines and noises and running around all melt away if only for a short time, but that’s what makes it so special.
I get it.
That’s why we all can’t wait to get up there every Friday…it let’s us not be from Toronto for a while.

For over half my life, Lou Schizas has been one of my best friends.
He and I were "set up" by a mutual pal who told both of us..."There's this guy I know whom I'd think you'd really hit it off with."
She was right.
We met at some party in Calgary about 1983 and that was it.

Some of you know him from the Oakley show on Am 640. Well Oakley inherited Lou from me.
Lou first started back on a morning show I was doing in Cowtown on a feature we called "Ask Mr. Schizas."
He was hysterical and smart and a good friend.
He still is.

He just launched his own website HappyCapitalism.
If your looking for some great stock advice and insight I highly recommend you check it out.

This morning's Star had the story of the Police officer who was killed yesterday and it's a sad, horrible tale.
It's headlined "Death of a Good Cop" and it's a heartbreaking bit of news.
Contable Rob Plunkett was on a routine surveillance operation and it turned into his death.
It was one of those incidents that our Police force faces all the time that just went tragic in an instant.
Check this out for the full story.
It's just a sad set of circumstances that didn't have to happen and I found myself so pissed off at the criminals that killed him. No not "allegedly!" they did it and they should be put away forever for it.
Read the article, it will no doubt touch you the way it did me.

I finally saw Shut up and Sing, the Dixie Chicks movie last night and it is amazing.
Besides the fact that these are talented, delicious women, all of whom could use me as their pleasure toy, it's a great documentary about the mentality of the conservative right in America.
Sweet Natalie Maines just said she was embarrassed that President Bush was from Texas and the whole world turned on the group.
Banned from Country Radio, protests and death threats...and through it all the Chicks remained a strong unified group.
Check out this clip from the movie.

Thanks to my pal Fraser P for sending me this cool article on Tiger.
As some of you know I have a man-crush on Tiger and if we both lived on the same block I would go over to see if he wanted to hang out. BFF's.
Anyway just so you know here's some more CSBU.(Content Supplied By You!)

David Feherty on Tiger Woods

"People have accused me of being so far up Tiger's a.., that
he can barely make a full swing, but I maintain that he is a special
person.
There's no one else on the planet who can do what he does or
even think of doing what he does. I've often thought, instead of
showing
Tiger's reaction to a shot he's hit, we really should show the reaction
of those around him."

"I could have described that shot for 15 minutes and not
done as good a job as Ernie did with two words. This is one of the best
players in the world talking, and you wanna know how good Tiger
is? Ask Ernie Els."

Thanks to Tom from DHL for sending me this. YouTube maybe a blogger's crutch but I don't care.
It's hot and when you supply the content there's less for me to do.
I promise though, you will dig this.
Enjoy.

When I was in OshKosh I bought my first Tilley Hat. It was hot as ass down there and I wanted something to keep the sun off my neck and picked one up.
It's awesome. I love it and I feel like an explorer when I wear it. Even if I'm only exploring the possibility of having another beer.
These people are freaks for The Hat though.

The thing comes with a 4 page owners manual. Seriously.
Check it out here.
Then come back.

So far the only thing I don't like about it is the sweat factor. I get all sweaty in the back of my head.
I thought it might allow more air-flow but it doesn't .
Maybe I just have an extra sweaty head.
This guy in the Tilley Hat doesn't seem to have a sweaty head. Does he not sweat? Is he too cool? I'll be he sweats plenty but they probably dried off his soggy bean prior to the shoot.

The other day I wrote about reading Harry Potter and wanting JK Rowlings to adopt me. In my haste I inadvertently let slip a few plot points that my have given away a bit of the story to those of you who haven't read it.
Sorry.
I recieved the following:

Welcome back, Howard
Your bit on Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows should have said "WARNING SPOILER ALERT" for those 3 people who haven't yet read far enough to know that Mad Eye Mooney bought it.
If you think that's wild, wait until ...
Once you're done, maybe we could start a father-daughter book club to discuss the ouvre of J.K. Rowling.
Posted by: Mike MacKay | July 31, 2007 / 08:38

Mikes right. I should have prefaced the entry with "MAY CONTAIN IMPORTANT HARRY POTTER FACTS THAT WILL ALLOW YOU TO SKIP ABOUT THE FIRST 200 PAGES!"
Mike is also a friend of mine who drinks very good scotch.

Have to agree with Mike. I just read it the other day, that would have bugged me huge. When is a spoiler no longer a spoiler though?
Posted by: thatmasonkid | July 31, 2007 / 09:49

I don't know thatmasonkid but he makes a point. When is a spoiler no longer a spoiler? How long does everybody have to be quiet about a book/show/movie so as not to ruin it for those who haven't bothered to see it.
I love the movie The Usual Suspects but should we not be allowed to talk about how Kevin Spacey is Keyser Söze just because some people have yet to rent it.
Oops.

What then is the statute of limitations about leaking important pop-culture plot points?

By the way, I finished the book yesterday. Loved it.
SPOILER ALERT!
In the end Don Corleone dies and Michael becomes the new Godfather. Fredo get's whacked, ET goes home and Darth Vader is really Harry's father.

I'm on the phone with master mike boon and he directed me to one of his entries about Barry Bonds and what an over-inflated, under-whelming bid for the B-Ball record his quest has been.
Especially versus Hand Aarons
Check out the entry and click on the player to listen to a bit from Ken Burns doc.
Chill factor-very high.
TorontoMikeBringsit.

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