It's sometimes hard for me to articulate. Trust me, I've tried.
-He's the best that's ever played the game and I get to be alive while it's actually happening...
-I've been a golf fan since I was a kid and for the first time a Golfer is the most dominant athlete on the planet.
-He's so excellent at the game and such an enigma away from it that all you have to concentrate on his is ability as opposed to his "real life" which most of us don't know much about.
Actually all of the above.
I came across this article from a dude named Chris Ballard at SI and it goes along way towards explaining my/our fascination with TW.
Fans will never know Tiger Woods, that's why watching him is fun
When the Masters begins this week, we know what to expect from Tiger Woods -- the person, that is, not the golfer. He will be polite but not forthcoming, pleasant but elusive. Tiger does not Twitter or Dance with Stars or pose, brooding and shirtless, for fashion magazines. He declines nearly all media requests and named his $20 million yacht Privacy; you even need a password to read the infrequent, mundane posts on his website.
Why? Lore has it that ever since a 1997 GQ story portrayed him as being just like any other college kid, he has retreated into his shell (super-lightweight titanium, now available from Nike). And many have bemoaned this. They want to really know Tiger, to understand what makes him tick. If only he showed his human side more often, these people say, we could truly embrace him.
But I for one don't want to embrace him. Rather, I think Tiger's aloofness is precisely why he is so much fun to watch. Because we get so little from Woods, we can focus solely on his performance. I don't want Tiger to drain a huge putt and then, 30 minutes later, send out a tweet saying: OMG, WAS SOOOO NERVOUS ON THAT ONE!!! Instead, give me Tiger in the moment, cursing at his clubs, roaring in triumph or sulking like a man who cannot, will not, abide imperfection. Softer side? I like to imagine there is no softer side to Woods, that he becomes incensed at the washing machine if it doesn't properly whiten his T's, that he exchanges overexuberant high-fives with his wife after conquering the lawn with his push mower. (C'mon, Tiger would never use a riding mower.)
Think about it. When we talk about Alex Rodriguez or Terrell Owens, we talk about a lot more than baseball or football, and that's our loss. But when we talk about Tiger, we talk about golf. Will he break Nicklaus's record? Has he remade his swing? If you had straight-up odds before a tournament, would you choose Tiger or the rest of the field? (Seriously, you're taking the field?)
He's almost like an old-time movie star, one we see only in character. Even his ads stay on message. Rather than Tiger at home, goofing with the family, we see Tiger the Competitor, nailing a 50-foot chip shot, or Tiger the Sports Messiah, walking on water. It only increases the distance between him and us. Hell, his mystique is such that during the AT&T National in 2007, he sparked a round of applause when he stepped out of a portable toilet on the course, as if he'd just peed excellence.
Sure there is a trade-off. Word is that Woods is actually a pretty funny guy among friends -- when his buddy Charles Barkley went to prison for three days, Tiger sent him soap-on-a-rope. But if forgoing the personal details means we can also forgo the rest of the dreck that comes with an athlete's overexposure, then it's worth it. I used to respect Jason Taylor. Now all I can think about is the damn cha-cha.
Tiger remains first and foremost a competitor. A month ago, when he returned from knee surgery to play in the Accenture Match Play tournament, I watched as most of the Houston Rockets gathered around a small ceiling-mounted TV after practice to watch, gazing up as if Woods were Neil Armstrong. "I want Tiger to win every single time he plays," forward Shane Battier said. "But I don't want it to be easy. I want him to be pressed. I want it to come down to the end every time." Asked why, Battier said solemnly, "Because we've never seen another competitor like him, other than Michael Jordan. He never misses a putt that counts. Never."
Of course this isn't true, but it feels that way, doesn't it? And whereas MJ played a team sport, in which chemistry is paramount -- meaning he had no choice but to relate to people -- Woods doesn't, and so ... he doesn't. Think this doesn't give him an advantage over his competitors? Who are you going to fear more: the affable, talented golfer who is everybody's pal, or the aloof one who can seem like a golf cyborg -- the Birdienator 2000? (What's more, on the occasions that Tiger does become emotional, like after sinking a ridiculous putt or when he hugged his father after winning his first Masters, it is all the more powerful.)
Take it from a man well-versed in the psyche of the killer competitor: Jordan's longtime agent, David Falk. "Fans get what I call functional fixity," says Falk. "They assume a player is the same way outside his sport as when playing. Tiger's a private guy, but who cares? His whole essence is to eclipse Nicklaus and win majors. It's the only reason he plays."
And, if you ask me, it's the only reason we need to watch.
....that Americans are mostly* stupid, this should finally erase it.
I can't believe there are A) People this fucking stupid with TV jobs and B) People fucking stupid enough to watch and believe this stuff.
Sorry for the F-bombs but I'm really pissed off and I can't get over how ridiculous this little segment on Fox news was.
Not to mention how disrespectful and uninformed it proves the average American is. And by average I mean way below average/Douch-Nozzle.
We've had far too many Canadian soldiers die in Afghanistan for these ass-holes to be so idiotic and cavalier in relation to our military and it's commitment and sacrifice.
So watch it and just try and not get steamed.
(* ...of course when I say mostly stupid I don't mean Jon May and Buffalo Mike and other very not stupid Americans...)
Had lots of comments about my entry where I threw the entire weight of this "monster" web-site behind Barack Obama and I say thank you.
I believe that he is the right guy at the right time and that Tuesday will not only be historic in terms of a visible minority becoming President but it will also be historic in terms of voter turn out. Now if they can just assure us that all those votes will be counted that would be a good thing. FP wrote a nice piece about that very subject...have a look-see.
In other Hhdotcom news. I spent a bittersweet night with my ten-year old Friday. I went out with her as she and her buds begged for candy on a warm Halloween. Of course the 14 year old was no where to be found as she and her pals were at a party. My Daddy/Halloween time with her is officially over.
At any rate I was allowed to follow Spenny on her appointed rounds as long as I kept a respectful distance to give her the impression I didn't actually exist. I had time to contemplate parenting while my little girl ran from door to door. It seems Parenting by it's definition is basically planning for your own obsolescence. I was thinking that if my wife and I do a really good job eventually these kids won't need us at all! Which kind of sucks and not so much at the same time.
Finally I've had a weekend off from taping ManUp Canada , the bizarre, funny and strange guy- game show that will start to air in January on MenTV. This week we wrote and planned a whole new set of challenges for our next 4 shows. I enjoy this part of the process as well as the hosting because it's a chance to let our imaginations run wild in terms of what we could get the contestants to do. Sculpt hamburger, plunger race, Sumo love guru...these are actual bit we're considering. I bring this up because one of the other writers sent me a note after our meeting Friday that I think sums up the unique nature of what we're trying to do. Here's the line-up as discussed for the next 4 episodes. If we can't get a bobcat, it will be replaced with Blow Fish Jungle Challenge (which will also mean switching Fish Race 2000 with Chip Shot Head so that we don't have two fish challenges in the same episode).
Who wouldn't love working on a show like that?
Posted by Humble on November 2, 2008 @ 09:08|Permalink
Hello. I like Barack Obama. You?
And not just because Opie does. Or any of the other Celebs. I just dig him and I'm fascinated to be alive in a time when a Black man could/should be President.
No I don't think John McCain is evil. He's a good man who has served his country well and deserves our respect and honor. He should have been President 8 years ago but he got shit-canned by the great George Bush and the maniacal Karl Rove and Friends.
It's just no longer John McCain's time. Also he let his peeps talk him into Sarah Palin which was just so nonsensical it doesn't bear commenting. (Sorry Buffalo Jon but I will never be able to figure that out!)
I love watching Fox news and yelling at what a douche Sean Hannity is. That's my favorite part of this election cycle. I've renewed my loathing for Fox news and they're ridonkulous right-wing crap-a-thon. Although to be fair Bill O'Reily is more balanced and fair than you'd think and way more than Sean Douch-ity.
Of course CNN isn't much better in it's lap-dog left-leaning reportage, but they are a little less douchey and mean.
In the meantime I, like many Canadians and others around the planet are riveted to this election and can't wait till next Tuesday. It will be quite the night. Historic, emotional and fascinating and one I hope my children will be telling their children about.
I was going to Stratford yesterday with the family and this was all over the news. While traveling westbound on the 401 we could see a line of cars in the eastbound lanes, that stretched on for miles because police were still on the scene of an apparent road-rage death.
You must have heard about it too.
A couple of guys, pissed off at each other, going back and forth and surely giving each other the fingers...escalated to a point where one idiot cut off the other and unfortunately the one guy flipped his vehicle and died.
What a stupid way to go.
Now one guy is dead and the other guys life if ruined and why? Because someone cut someone else off and now who gives a shit.
I used to get really mad at other drivers. We've all done it. Once I was cut off by a guy downtown and I drove halfway to Hamilton so I could give him the finger. Dumb.
Now I just don't care that much anymore.
Too bad these 2 poor bastards couldn't have gotten over whatever was pissing them off because one guy would still be alive and the other wouldn't be spending the foreseeable future in jail.
What a stupid, stupid way to die.
My last entry Friday is below. I commented about the bizarrO world of the Leaf Fan who feels glee at the demise of the Ottawa Sens and forgets that their own pathetic squad hasn't done squat in a very long time.
I will stop this now as I see that resistance is futile and that the Borg Collective is too strong.
Before I'm completely done though I would like to address Brenda's Boyfriend from Cambridge.
BGFC writes...
Humble, you happen to be 'anti-leaf'. Not 'pro-any-other-team'. But 'anti-leaf'. There's a difference. (I'm not anti-Leaf, I'm just not Pro-Leaf...there's the difference.)
Thus, your stance in all matters of hockey (specifically regarding Leaf topics) must be read with that bias in mind.(Yes the bias of a Leaf Fan who can't understand why I didn't drink the Kool-ade!)
It's easy to cheer for the best (a la Tiger Woods or the Red Wings) when they're winning, how hard is that?(Your point?)
A true fan likes a team for what they stand for, who they have on their squad, their jersey's colours, Provincial or State flowers, etc, etc, whatever.(Agreed. But what about the abuse the Leafs heap on their fans...40 years of crap and the ticket price goes up every year. Leaf fans are the ultimate enablers.)
But when your team goes into a funk (because ALL teams--& Tigers do), you don't bail on them. Even if it is an extended 40 year funk, you still have to support your team.(See above.)
The Leaf fans I know do not plan the Stanley Cup parade route if the Leafs win 3 in a row in September.(Yes they do.)
The Leaf fans I know realize that Ottawa is (on paper) a much better team than Toronto. But they also realize that had Ottawa not won 15 in a row (was it?) back at the beginning of the season, they would not have made the playoffs either. (The Leafs haven't made the playoff in fours years...isn't that worse?)
The Leaf fans I know wish the head office of MLSE could function properly and build for us a half decent hockey team. But then, I don't think there is another hockey team owned primarily by a teacher's pension fund.(???)
The Leaf fans I know are not as delusional as 'anti-leaf' individuals seem to think they are. (BBFC I think your making the Leaf Fan as delusional point for me. Thanks.)
When Tiger starts sucking (and he will eventually suck) will you still be devoting a week's worth of blogs prior to the Master's about Mr. Tiger? Or will you jump on the Immelmania bandwagon..
First off I appreciate the passion that Brenda's Boyfriend and all Leaf Fans show but the analogy of Tiger and the TW bandwagon doesn't apply. It's individual versus team. When I was a kid I cheered for Bobby Orr, when he retired I he was still my favorite player, but I started to follow Gretsky. Eventually he stopped playing and I became a Lemeiux fan. Get the point?
I used to love Arnold Palmer, then Nicklaus, Norman, Couples, Faldo, then Tiger.
I have been on several individual players bandwagons over the years and when Tiger finishes his career I'm sure I will follow some one else.
Frankly I wish Michelle Wie would play better!
Years ago when I used to do a little Radio show, Rob Ford was an amusing guest from time to time.
I mean both he was amusing and a guest, from time to time.
Anyway he was the aforementioned simply because he was a "loose" cannon. He would say outrageous things and it was fun to hear him slam the other nitwits on City Council.
Well I guess that act has worn a little thin. The Asian-non apology thing, the threatening to kill your wife thing and now this nasty little clip.
I got this off of the Mighty Boon's site and it's sickening. It is Rob Fords' true colors and the reason he will never be Mayor of Toronto. It is the type of thing that will be run over and over again should he even think of trying for office.
The people in his ward might be cool with good old Rob's antics but his schtick has gotten old and it certainly won't play outside of his inner circle. Interesting article in the National Post for more.
Went to a thing at the Hockey Hall of Fame last night and it took me 50 minutes to drive there from Queen and River.
Cool huh?
Then later I met my old neighbor Captain Morgan for Sushi at a little joint next door. Good food and some very attractive Women-People. Fish and Chicks.
Ha that's Morning show funny. Now I just need to hit the traffic sounder while everyone in the room laffs like monkeys for reasons only they can explain.
I drove home last night to the O-dot going 40KMH and it took an hour fifteen. Yes the fun continues.
This morning I've been shoveling out my driveway. Dang its good to finally get the snow we've been dreaming of.
Posted by Humble on February 13, 2008 @ 08:07|Permalink
Not everybody wanted New England...
My pal Jon May from Buffalo sent me this rant.
Jon's a very bright guy who despite his support of The Bush's is quite articulate!
Have a read.
Interesting. Hey Howard (And Randee!)
I have to give you my two cents (worth only 1 cent Canadian)
Yes, this will be a typical Bitter Buffalo Fan rant.....
Watching the Patriots lose the Super Bowl was one of the most satisfying sports experiences of my life.
Yes, history would have been made if they'd won (history was instead made the other way).
But this Patriots team, many of its players and especially its coach, while undeniably talented, are just the most completely unlikeable group I've seen in years.
It isn't about beating the Bills. Your daughter's soccer team could do that on some days. (no offense to Charlie and her friends!)
But the fact is they cheat. They are arrogant. And they have a sense of entitlement and poor sportsmanship that should be held up to kids to show them how NOT to act.
I offer as proof of their bad character the simple example of Belichick (and Brady, and Moss) walking off the field at the end of the game with one play to go.
Moss did that years ago with Minnesota and was rightly castigated (that must've hurt!). No, their presence didn't matter and yes, he did shake Coughlin's hand (unlike Dungy's hand last year when they lost to the Colts). But if any other coach or player had done that, you'd hear howling--and rightly so.
Furthermore, every other team that got blown out by them this season (and there were quite a few, including the Bills) had to sit there and watch Bill Belichick run up the score when he didn't have to. So, it would seem reasonable for him to step up and take it like a man when he loses--especially only for one second.
However, that is not in Belichick's character and his lack of it has apparently spread to Brady, who took himself out of the Pro Bowl (along with Moss, who never had any character in the first place).
Wins count. Talent Counts. Success counts. If another team was vying for a perfect season (say, the Colts), I would be supporting them. Because they (and their coach) are great players AND appear to be good people.
But, character and class also count. And the Patriots have neither.
End of rant! (sorry!) Thanks for listening!!
Hope all is well,
JON
Products from cloned dairy cows are indistinguishable from those of conventionally raised animals, the FDA says.
Products from the offspring of cloned cattle, pigs and goats can enter the food supply immediately, and without special labeling. Items could become routinely available in three to five years.
Tell me that doesn't scare the crap out of you. Really Mad Cow anyone?
That's what we need. It's not bad enough that our food supply is manufactured in meat factories and injected with all manner of hormones, enhancers and Roger Clemens-goo, now we've got our best and brightest trying to get us to eat cloned food that's bad for us.
I don't know it all seems a little Omega man to me. "...then we finally figured out how to clone our food supply and no one would go hungry again. That was just before we all started dieing except those that were immune or turned into crazed zombie-cannibals!"
Posted by Humble on January 16, 2008 @ 08:40|Permalink
Notes from me to you.
I don't have an entry theme, just a few tidbits. As opposed to TimBits.
From the desk of Hhdotcom.
Food: Haven't eaten any in 8 days. Feel fine. Wrapping up the cleanse Monday, one day ahead of schedule due to the fact that it takes 4 days to come off it and we're having some people over next Saturday and we don't want our first real meal to be then. Plus we're both "cleansed" enough.(Damm you herbal laxative tea.)
Football: I watched The New England/Jacksonville game last night. Dang those Pats have themselves a nice little team there. Their winning streak continues and anything short of winning the Super Bowl would suck for them. I wonder if Tom Brady is very popular in New England?
Too bad he's not very good looking or talented.
Fun: I am going to Whistler with some Soccer Dads and I can't wait. My conundrum(yes I have those) is apparently my thumb is really f-ed. My doctor says skiing and snowboarding are the worst things I could do right now. Geez I wonder what else there is to do in Whistler at the end of January.
Screw it. I'll just wrap it up and go. Hell I've got 2 thumbs, the other one still works.(At least I can hold a beer or scotch or other booze items.)
Work: Doing lots of it again this week. Shooting, editing and client hand-holding. Plus I've got another Moses meeting coming up this week and some other stuff that could turn out to be cool too.
I'll try and post when I can.
Have a great week.
Posted by Humble on January 13, 2008 @ 17:45|Permalink
More from Al Gore's "Current."
I've mentioned I go to this site quite a bit lately. Very cool stuff and very collaborative.
I recently came across this bit.
Interesting. Hello America.
Are you really the greatest country in the world or just the greatest country that most of you have heard of.
Why do you call it the World Series when only American teams( and one Canadian)play?
Why do you win a World Championship when you capture the Super Bowl yet nobody else on the planet is invited?
Does telling yourselves you're the greatest make is so?
All good questions America.
Just curious.
American's pride themselves on so many great achievements but are mostly ignorant of the accomplishments of others.
America claims to have the best lifestyle, health care, economy, political system, but truth be told it's not even the best on the continent. Not even close.
America is being increasingly marginalized by a world that has free access to information about itself and increasingly gets to see that the old U.S.A ain't what she used to be.
The sad part? Everyone recognizes this but Americans.
Don't get me wrong I still like America, I'm just not in love with it anymore.
Posted by Humble on January 10, 2008 @ 07:11|Permalink
Favorite comment of 2008...so far.
Meredith sent me this in response to my wanking about my snowboarding injuries. I broke my tailbone the first time I snowboarded. It took 6 months for it to stop hurting when I got off the toilet. Even now, 10 years later, if I sit in a crappy chair (like those found in movie theatures) it starts to hurt.
Go see a chiropractor. Your pelvic bone may have shifted with your tailbone being out of place.
Good luck with the thumb. Hope you can still masturbate.
No worries M, I'm a righty. Wouldn't matter anyway, I don't need my thumb to work my "self-magic" I use a modified kung-fu grip or the crook of my arm. Or sometimes an old sock.
Okay I'll stop now.
Talking about it, I mean.
Posted by Humble on January 7, 2008 @ 20:21|Permalink
Travelling for work. Oh yeah, that's a load of fun.
Now I know why business people looked so peeved when they travel.
Traveling for work is work.
Here is a look at the last 7 business days for me.
Drive to Pearson, park, stand in line, wait for plane, plane delayed. Fly to Montreal.
Montreal. Cab to hotel, next day work, cab back to airport, miss flight, flight delayed, fly to Ottawa.
Ottawa. Cab to hotel, next day work, cab back to airport, flight delayed, fly to Winnipeg.
More of same, fly back to Toronto.
Fly to Calgary, plane late, cab to hotel. Next day work, cab to airport, fly to Edmonton.
Edmonton work, fly back to Toronto.
Hey doesn't that sound like fun?
Being in the cities and doing the job was great, getting to and from...not so much.
No wonder business class cost so much. It's worth it.
Posted by Humble on January 7, 2008 @ 10:26|Permalink
Couple of nice people checking in. Hi Nice People.
I don't get too many comments on my site. Maybe I'm not "controversial" enough or maybe only me and my Brothers read this drivel.
Soccer Mom pops in from time to time but I think that's because she and I are sweet on each other.
Boon will occasional drop by and spew and of course my pal JasonGetYourOj always has a word or two.
I do get some comments that I receive directly from the contact page. and I like those as well.
They are often more detailed or private or just catching up.
Hi, Humble! It's Danielle Carriere. I sent you my slime stories from my work email last year. I transferred from the Toronto office to the firm's Edmonton office in January of 2007 and so much has happened (I had a beautiful baby girl in July) that I completely forgot about the contest. I've been on maternity leave since June and had a difficult pregnancy and therefore lost touch with a lot of my Toronto friends for a while. I was in the West Edmonton Mall yesterday with my daughter and decided to stop in the bookstore to check out "weight loss after pregnancy" books when I happened to stumble upon your book. I was surprised but excited to see that you had printed two of my slime stories (the slime male nurses do and Mexico time share slime). The book is a GREAT read! Congratulations on a job well done!!
Longtime listener and pal Dean from Hamilton also checked in recently.
Good to hear that you are busying yourself with stuff that sounds fun. My youngest daughter Banyan game up with an epiphany today. My wife was totally unappreciative of its brilliance and I thought you a man that would see the depth of the truth it reveals. She said; "You know, life would sure be different if we could see farts." A philosophy major in the making. I hope all is well with you and yours.
Dean from Hamilton
I love that comment. "What if we could see farts?" I know the air would be a lot cloudier in my house!
Posted by Humble on November 20, 2007 @ 13:51|Permalink
2 Movies 2 Good Rentals. One so-so Theatrical release.
My wife was in MTL this weekend so I rented a few good flicks. We are Marshall.
Great schlocky sports flick with Mathew McConaughy as the head coach who's gonna "rebuild the football program" after a horrific plane crash that wipes out the team.
It's one of those movies based on a true story that is really good and it turns out true.
Definitely worthy if you're browsing and can't make up your mind. 7 out of 10.
You Kill Me.
Stars Ben Kingsly as an alcoholic hit-man who is messing up on his job (not killing people!) so his employers, the Buffalo Snow-Plow Mob send him Westward for help.
He joins AA, meets Luke Wilson, gets to sex it up with Tea Leone (also the films producer) and eventually finds sobriety, redemption and gets back to the biz of killing.
I liked this mainly cause Ben Kingsly is a dang good bad guy. It's a much watered-down version of his crazy assassin in Sexy Beast but BK can still bring it.
Also Tea Leone is nice to look at.
7.5 out of 10.
Fred Claus.
I took Spencer to this while Charlie had some boys over for a project. (A whole other story but suffice it to say I made it clear to the lads that a) I was crazy and b) should anything go on bad things would happen.)
Anyway Fred Claus is a fine kid-flick with some huge acting pedigree up on the screen.
Paul Giamatti, Kevin Spacey, Vince Vaughn, Miranda Richardson, Rachel Weisz, and Kathy Bates.
Too bad the script was so weak. That cast should have been doing The Usual Suspects 2.
The whole thing is like every Vince Vaughn movie you've ever seen. He's a wise-cracking hipster who has spent his whole life in the shadow of his younger brother Santa Claus. A bunch of stuff happens and then in the end Vince and Santa hug and it's over.
Your kids will like it but not if they're too young. I think any age under 6 or 7 will have trouble toughing out the nearly 2 hours of holiday hokeyness.
6.2 out of 10
Posted by Humble on November 12, 2007 @ 08:47|Permalink
More about me from you...
I've had quite a week of input from you and I appreciate it.
The big comment generator was the Mac quest.
Wow. You Mac people are like a cult.
I bought one on eBay (used) last year, which came preloaded with tons of software. At first I thought I would only use it for e-mail and surfing, now I have pretty well abandoned my Windows PC. Brought it home, opened the case, it immediately found my home network and I was hooked. No need for pesky virus softwar/updates and an easy migration from Windows. Go for it!
Posted by: Tom
Got the MacBook. Swear by it. Like the lady said...no going back after you gots de Mac yo!!
Posted by: Tim
My family owns six of them. I just bought a MacBook White on Saturday - the mid model, faster processor, larger HD. The simplicity of the Mac is the big selling feature for me. Want to hook up to a wireless network. Done. No settings, no fooling around. Printer. Easy peasy.
With the exception of the myriad of games available to the other guys, there is very little that you can't do on the Mac. Oh and migration of stuff from your PC is breeze
As for prices, the differential is now $150. I paid $1449, for the same product that cost $1299 in the US.
Posted by: Michael
Thanks nice people. I appreciate it the advice. Only thing that's stopping me is the Gang-mocking I'll get from RR and the peeps at ACME pictures.(New job..see entry below.)
My favorite comment came from D in Hamilton who read my entry about Charlie's last Halloween.
D's a parent like me and said:
You have to stop making me cry at work. You've been on a roll lately. I had an almost identical experience last night with my kids. However Sequoia reaffirmed what I've always known (that she's a great kid). I told her that I remember carrying her around in a little bat costume and as she walked away to go with her friends she said; "And I will always try and carry a small piece of that bat with me". Parenting is the greatest adventure. Keep up the great stuff Howard, I'll just move the Kleenex box closer to my computer.
Posted by Humble on November 2, 2007 @ 09:35|Permalink
You people...checking in.
Hey Hhdotcom peeps. Thanks for checking in.
Quite a bit of feedback...here's some.
A little suggestion for the nano...
For some reason which will forever remain a mystery to me, I woke up with Lambs Head running through my head (That little lambs head costs a dollar fifty two). Why something from H&F #1 in 97 should mysteriously appear in my brain I have no idea but I thought I should share the joy!!!
Signed,
Felkins.
Buffalo Boy is a good dude who has been part of the H+F world for some time and now he's up and running on the net.
He checked in recently. Howard, Mike Boon and I have been working hard on my new blog buffaloboymike.com. I have to give you credit for creating the idea of buffaloboy as the name has stuck with me over the years. Could ya give me a little promo and link me on your site?
I can honestly say you, freddie and mike inspired me to get into it and its a lot of fun.
Thanks
Mike (Buffalo Boy)
PS I have you linked in my sidebar
And then I received this hysterical bit of back and forth from some Hhdotcom regulars.
Great! They're filming another Short Circuit movie with you resurrecting the Steve Guttenberg role.
See you Saturday. Toronto Mike
No it's an Ed the sock Biography.
james edgar
I hear they asked Howie to do the Ed the Sock movie and he turned down the $20 million offer on principle.
Maybe this is The Dini Petty movie I've heard rumblings about...
Toronto Mike
Trust me, this posting alone is a lot more interesting than certain other places.
Jason
Posted by Humble on October 25, 2007 @ 08:32|Permalink
Faith-Based School stuff. Day 4
All right kids let's play nice. By far the most thoughtful and passionate comments Hhdotcom has ever received on a posting. Thank you all.
The debate here shows just how important the issue is in this election. Tim's e-mail posted yesterday spurred quite the response from a diverse group and I urge you to go back and read them all.
A group called The Coalition for Educational Fairness checked in. Interesting bunch with a perspective that is summed up nicely by this.
My pal Soccer Mom had some nice points. (Has some nice "points" too, if memory serves me!) "...I directed my taxes 50/50 and so can anyone, and even though my son has graduated from the school system my taxes still remain as such. It just sad that more of us don’t know you can do this and we need to be informed that this is an option. What they are presenting is an all or nothing at all and that doesn’t have to be the case. If this option was broadcasted to the masses there would not be the need for such an up-roar."
Fred had this to say.(Not that Fred.) "More than a few people have said they will not vote for McG because he is a liar and does not keep promises and in the next breath say they do not believe Tory will come through with the funding for FBS. Is there not something wrong with this picture? (and before anyone says that nobody would say that...read the first post).
What about those of us that do not belong to any faith but choose to not send our children to the public system? Will Atheists be afforded funding for their private schools too?
How about this as a proposal...rather than create dozens of small school boards for each faith that is able to get funding, why not offer classes on different faiths in the public system? Give everyone the opportunity to learn about different beliefs and NOT segregate people based on religion. I suspect the world would be a better place if we all understood each other a little bit better.
And lastly, what ever happened to the separation of church and state? Since when did it become the government’s responsibility to teach children about their faith? Is that not what parents are for?
In my mind, this was a brilliant move by Tory. He keeps the media focused on a single issue and never has to defend the rest of his platform and McG looks weak because he does not support the proposal but cannot commit political suicide and declare he wants the catholic system abolished.
I appreciate you all being part of this. As many or you know I enjoy others helping with the Hhdotcom content and this is also an issue I (and many of you) feel strongly about.
I must tell you I've had a conversation with my local NDP guy and he agreed with me about the fairness issue but the party line is a whole different story.
No politician wants to be the first to say let's level the playing field. At least John Tory isn't pretending that it is.
Posted by Humble on September 27, 2007 @ 08:17|Permalink
Faith-Based School stuff. Day 3
One of my friends teaches in the public school system. He has an interesting take on the subject.
Have a read, I think you'll agree.
Thanks Tim.
Humble,
I am a man of faith and I teach in the public system...you know that.
I admit that for me there is probably a lot more at stake here than just creating 'alternatives' for people's education. With money as tight as it is already in the public system...how on earth are we going to pay for so much more? I am concerned about my job. Student numbers will drop. Jobs will be lost. Can I get employment at a Muslim (as a Christian/Jew/Hundu/Sikh/etc) school when there is nothing left in the public system?...It's not an question of it simply being the same amount of kids, nothing changes. There will be significant changes.
Yes there is a question of fairness. Absolutely. But the problem is not adding more 'separate' schools, but making it a one part public education system. Nothing against the Catholic system. But for it to be truly fair...make it all the same. Not a bunch of 'different'.
The dividing of the system will only 'ghetto-ise' everything. Jews here. Muslims here. Buddhists here. Etc.
Although Dalton McSquinty does make your bile rise, I think what he is saying is fundamentally sound. I teach in the public system and we do "work/live together".
Its hard enough to try and gain understanding when you are together "24/7" (see earlier Blog about pooing in the downstairs toilet). But you if you work at it and have the opportunity to do so...you do.
At my school, and others in the Peel system, we celebrate diversity as much as possible (Ramadan, Diwali, Hanukkah, etc...they are all honoured)...separate us and I think it will cause more damage.
By the way, since when is it a school's job to teach faith? Ultimately, I believe that faith is a church/synagogue/temple/mosque/etc's job. Separation of church and state makes sense here.
A school is NOT a faith based school because it has a religion's or a person-of-faith's name on the outside wall. It is all about what's being done on the inside.The "Golden Rule" happens across all faiths in some form or another...so if I am respecting and caring for my staff and student's well being and 'doing unto them...' am I not being my own micro-cosmic faith-based-school?
Posted by Humble on September 26, 2007 @ 10:48|Permalink
Faith-Based School stuff. Day 2
Yesterday I deviated from my formula or wry observation gusting to non-stop hilarity and jokey-jokes and put up a comment about this whole "Faith-based school funding."
My Pal Lou Schizas checked in with his take. Hi Howard - as I mentioned when we discussed the funding of faith based schools today. Parents do not send their children to Catholic Schools for the 1/2 hour a day of faith training they get - its because they believe that its a higher quality education. My take on the situation is the same as all public sector programs-- they fail to work because the public system can only exist without competition - if every family was given an education voucher - and could freely choose which school they could send their children to I doubt it would be a public school. And with the Mc Ads when I see them I ask where do his kids go to school? Happy Captalism!
To me it is the only issue of note in this Fall election and it permeates all aspects of the political discourse.
From the obvious: Bill Murdoch the PC incumbent in Bruce-Grey-Owen Sound says he didn't realize how divisive the issue would be when it was first introduced by our leader....and should this come before the legislature I will vote against it!
Okay Bill thanks for weighing in with that, it's nice to hear a politician saying what he really thinks, even if I don't agree with it.
The not so obvious comes from Dalton McG of course, who went to Catholic school mind you and is pushing the "We're all in this Together" crap every chance he gets.
When asked, How many countries have you visited? He replies, blah blah trade mission to China, blah blah to fully appreciate how blessed we are in Ontario to be home to people from every corner of the globe, who (here it comes) live Together here and work and build Together, blah blah.
Give me a break. Yeah we all work, live and build together, except those in the separate school system.
John Tory is starting to get the vibe that this isn't the most popular issue he could have raised but I like the fact that he had the balls to do it.
He says no matter what opposition he gets he'll go forward with his plan because it's a "matter of principle."
What more can you ask of someone in charge. Tell us what you're going to do then when your elected do it.
Okay, that's it for today now back to the jokey-jokes and YouTube videos.
Posted by Humble on September 25, 2007 @ 08:59|Permalink
Fund them all or none of them.
This will be as close to seriously political as I get.
John Tory wants to fund all faith-based schools and that is getting some people all bent out of shape.
Dalton McGinty has jumped on this by saying we should all go to school "Together!"
His commercials make me nauseous. When I see them I can actually feel the sick get caught in my throat.
In a way, I agree with both. Here's why. (With apologies to all my Catholic peeps.)
If you fund a separate school system for Catholics then you should fund one for all faith-based schools. (Tory's point.)
But if you want us all to learn "Together," ( Help me gag-reflex) then get rid of the only ONE you are funding .
That's never going to happen.
(Interesting the Liberals want us all to "learn together", "be together" and "understand each other." Just not the Separate School System!)
So if you're not going to cease funding the Catholic schools then you should fund all the other faith-based ones. Why should you get to direct your property taxes into a certain system because you believe in a certain religious point of veiw?
Seems simple but of course it's not.
My wife doesn't agree with me and maybe you won't either. I will say I've always found a separate school board unfair long before this election. It just seems strange that in 2007 any religion would have an advantage over any others and that's what this is.
An unfair advantage.
Posted by Humble on September 24, 2007 @ 08:31|Permalink
Dan Duran Speaks.
In an effort to do less and provide more drivel, I have enlisted the help of RR's(Regular Readers) and friends to "fill in the blanks" left by my apathy.
I'm happy to say that Dan Duran has risen to the challenge.
Yesterday when I published an exclusive interview with Dan many of you weighed in with comment.
Thank you. Comments are always welcome here at Hhdotcom. Mainly for the ability to recycle comments into content.
Watch.
I do the interview with Dan.
He comments with some smart-alecky remarks.
OK I would like to clear some things up
I now believe that 9-11 was perpetrated by Osama bin Laden's kidney dialysis machine which directed the media, and therefore public opinion, with it's Bluetooth features.
ShotGlass Larry has often supplied urine samples for law enforcement cover-ups and framing olympic athletes and should not be given the time of day (just a cliche as I'm sure he no longer has anyconcept of time)
I have never hammered my head. However the nail on my left finger is just returning to it's proper length after my electric driver fell off of a slot screw. Arrgg. The Robertson screw is king.
My last comment is for Howard. I really think that you have room for at least 2 more photos of me in this posting. Please try as I'm sure your blog traffic will spike to your liking.
Dan Duran
Presto! I've got another entry and we all get to enjoy new and diverse Hhdotcom hilarity.
See, everybody wins, including Dan Duran who would like to see more of his head.
Posted by Humble on September 20, 2007 @ 08:02|Permalink
The first Tuesday since 9/11.
Today is Tuesday September 11. The last time it was Tuesday on this date was the day that 9/11 was born.
How sad/angry/horrified we were and how jaded/cynical and tired of the whole thing some of us are now.
We will never forget that terrifying day or the people who's lives were lost but now their memory is being scarred by a ridiculous war and many more Canadian/American lives that have been lost.
One question.
If Osama Bin Laden led Al Qauida and was reportedly being helped by sympathizers in Afghanistan, than why did the US go to war with Iraq?
No there is no simple answer but as time goes by there will be more and more questions.
I'm no conspiracy theorist (okay a bit-go here if you want to have you mind blown!)
but there will always be something fishy about the way things happened the last time it was a Tuesday on 9/11.
Posted by Humble on September 11, 2007 @ 09:02|Permalink
Sad times in the MTL.
Most of you Toronto types don't know Ernie Butler but in Montreal he was the king of comedy.
He ran a club there for years and helped launch and sustain many a young comic's career.
Ask any of the radio people, they all knew Ernie.
I met him while I worked there and liked him right away. He knew my wife before I did and our first date (Randee and I, not me and Ernie) was at his comedy club.
He was even at our wedding.
I just found out last night he died suddenly last week and it was sad news indeed. We hadn't kept in close touch these last few years, but whenever I ran into him he was always good for a laugh.
A hale fellow well met, or whatever that quote is.
This is from his obit.
Over five hundred friends, family and colleagues packed St. Monica's Church in NDG today for the funeral of the 58-year-old comedy impresario who died last week of stomach cancer.
Ernie's younger brothers Michael and John eulogized their sibling as a generous and devoted family man; a big brother who gave John, a Bobby Orr fan, his only ticket to a playoff game between the Bruins and the Canadiens.
"He has no idea that it was one of the greatest evenings of my life and it was all because of Ernie."
In his homily, Father John Walsh says Ernie put others in the spotlight instead of turning it on himself, giving comics their big break at his comedy club.
"Ernie never said he was the best stand-up comic because his real strength, and he knew it, was that he was a great master of ceremonies."
Walsh says Ernie helped anybody who felt that life was cruel to them or that they were rejected by society.
"Ernie turned cruelty into healing through laughter."
He leaves his wife Marie and his children Silver, Ryan and Shannon.
Posted by Humble on September 4, 2007 @ 10:44|Permalink
Time. Well-Wasted.
If your looking at Hhdotcom, what aren't you doing?
Posted by Humble on August 30, 2007 @ 10:35|Permalink
Nice people checking in.
Every so often some peeps check in here at Hhdotcom and I must say it's nice to hear from the nice people.
Carlos Benevides from DAVE Fm wrote in.
Hey Howard,
I haven't been to your site for awhile, (I know, wha's my problem?) but I stopped in tonight and I just wanted you to know how enjoyable it is everytime I check it out. Hope you and the family are well. Hope to see you at Luby's tourney in a few weeks. And looking forward to your "sort of" new radio venture.
Carlos
Thanks Carlos I hope to see you and your Half-Mexican self there too.
Hi Howard,
Just want to say that I miss you and Fred terribly. I absolutely loved the Mix morning show hosted by you, it was a great kickstart to my day. I honestly cannot find a half decent morning show. Nothing out there appeal to me. Are you considering back in the business???
Luv You
Jane
No Jane, I love you.
Hey Humble,
I just listened to your Podcast of Love today. Yes, it's August and I just found the podcast yesterday. I'm a Canadian citizen, born in Hong Kong, and now living in Ningbo, China. I used to be your show's loyal listener and followed your move to Mix999. I left in August 2005 from Toronto to follow my wife here in Ningbo, and I miss Toronto so much.
You know, listening to your podcast brought back many memories, although they were mainly of me stuck in my minivan on the 401 being kept off from massive road rage because I have you guys on the radio.
Today I replaced that memory with me being stuck in my Civic on a Chinese highway, and again, no road rage because of you and Fred and Dan.
And Humble, if you come to China to do an exclusively book signing in Ningbo for me, I'll sooooo buy your book to read what SLIME means and treat you to some Chinese slimes....actual slimes, I think they eat that in Guangzhou! :-D
Thanks!
James Cheung
Thanks James I would love to come to China for some Slime.
Posted by Humble on August 29, 2007 @ 08:44|Permalink
Todays Blogging Cartoon.
Posted by Humble on August 27, 2007 @ 09:33|Permalink
Nanny Diaries vs Mr. Bean.
I saw both the Nanny Diaries and Mr. Bean this past weekend, part of the "What can we take our kids to?" festival.
Let me just say that they are both very fine movies with a few differences.
The Nanny Diaries has Scarlett Johansen and Mr. Bean does not.
Although Rowan Atkinson is one of my favorite comic-genius-dudes, he is not however Scarlett Johansen.
Mr. Bean is a cute, somewhat funny fable about a nitwit who mixes every thing up and goes on capers.
The Nanny Diaries is the story of a nanny or something that stars the very delicious SJ.
If Mr.Bean had featured Scarlett Johansen it would have been a much better movie.
They are both good kid-flicks.
One has Mr. Bean. One has Scarlett.
You do the math.
Posted by Humble on August 27, 2007 @ 09:01|Permalink
Dogs on Blogging.
Blogging is what it is.
A new Media, communication, entertainment, a way for washed-up Radio guys to feel their still part of The Bigger Picture.
I enjoy it.
I hope you enjoy some of the drivel I pump out here from time to time.
I have no idea what impact my day to day rambling has, but a year after I started Hhdotcom I still like doing it.
Maybe not as much as before.
Maybe the novelties worn off.
Maybe.
Anyway here's another Blog cartoon I found and liked.
Have a great and safe weekend.
Posted by Humble on August 24, 2007 @ 09:50|Permalink
Highway of Heroes. No discussion.
You may have heard they are pondering the notion of re-naming a stretch of the 401 the "Highway of Heroes" to honor the Canadians that have died in the service of our country. This is the very definition of a no-brainer.
This is from CTV.ca... A section of Canada's busiest highway might be renamed the Highway of Heroes to honour the path fallen soldiers take from Canadian Forces Base Trenton to the coroner's office in Toronto.
Ontario Premier Dalton McGuinty said he will consider an online petition asking the Ministry of Transportation to change Highway 401's name.
Really. He'll consider it. How big of you DM.
Listen the only downside is that the Liberals will somehow make some political hay out of this. Whatever.
There have been too many trips from Trenton to Toronto carrying dead soldiers, calling that trail the Highway of Heroes is the least we can do.
No discussion.
What an ass. Pleads guilty to the charges of organizing a dog-fighting ring and for what?
What could he possibly gain from doing this? Nothing.
What could he lose? Well he's going to lose everything. Half of his 130 million contract, about 20 million of his 30 plus signing bonus and most of all his entire career and credibility.
And for what.
What an ass. Plead guilty and now go f-away.
Posted by Humble on August 21, 2007 @ 09:26|Permalink
SuperBad- Super F-ing Funny.
Friday night the kids were watching High School Musical 2. (Zak is so dreamy!) I
opted out and went to see SuperBad.
Wow.
It's by far the funniest movie I've been at for a long while.
Seth Rogan is that dude from 40 year old virgin and knocked up and he wrote this picture with his buddy Evan when he was 13.
The theatre was packed and it got so many laughs that many of the next lines were drowned out. I haven't experience that for some time.
I will say this. It's vulgar, juvenille and immature, so mostly it's a guy flick. But there's lots of laughs in there for both of your sexes.
Here's an unedited trailer.
If you have time, check out this interview with Seth Rogan. How old did you think he was?
Posted by Humble on August 20, 2007 @ 08:54|Permalink
Not ready to Make Nice?
Seems while Daddy was away some of you kids got into it over the Dixie Chicks entry.
A few HhDotcom-ers were going back and forth over free speech, George W.Bush and the whole Shut up and Sing-thing. Have a look here. Very interesting what stirs people up.
As for the DC's, vindication is a dish like revenge, better served cold and later. The Chicks have gotten the last laugh on the red-neck southerners who banned their music. They won 5 Grammies, are more popular than ever and 60 plus percent of Americans are now embarrassed that George W is from their home state.
Posted by Humble on August 16, 2007 @ 10:29|Permalink
The Dixie Chicks.
I finally saw Shut up and Sing, the Dixie Chicks movie last night and it is amazing.
Besides the fact that these are talented, delicious women, all of whom could use me as their pleasure toy, it's a great documentary about the mentality of the conservative right in America.
Sweet Natalie Maines just said she was embarrassed that President Bush was from Texas and the whole world turned on the group.
Banned from Country Radio, protests and death threats...and through it all the Chicks remained a strong unified group.
Check out this clip from the movie.
Check out this cool performance from the 2007 Grammies.
In case you forget(I did) they won 5 Grammies.
Posted by Humble on August 3, 2007 @ 09:24|Permalink
Spoiler Alert. Spoiler Alert.
The other day I wrote about reading Harry Potter and wanting JK Rowlings to adopt me. In my haste I inadvertently let slip a few plot points that my have given away a bit of the story to those of you who haven't read it.
Sorry.
I recieved the following:
Welcome back, Howard
Your bit on Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows should have said "WARNING SPOILER ALERT" for those 3 people who haven't yet read far enough to know that Mad Eye Mooney bought it.
If you think that's wild, wait until ...
Once you're done, maybe we could start a father-daughter book club to discuss the ouvre of J.K. Rowling.
Posted by: Mike MacKay | July 31, 2007 / 08:38
Mikes right. I should have prefaced the entry with "MAY CONTAIN IMPORTANT HARRY POTTER FACTS THAT WILL ALLOW YOU TO SKIP ABOUT THE FIRST 200 PAGES!"
Mike is also a friend of mine who drinks very good scotch.
Have to agree with Mike. I just read it the other day, that would have bugged me huge. When is a spoiler no longer a spoiler though?
Posted by: thatmasonkid | July 31, 2007 / 09:49
I don't know thatmasonkid but he makes a point. When is a spoiler no longer a spoiler? How long does everybody have to be quiet about a book/show/movie so as not to ruin it for those who haven't bothered to see it.
I love the movie The Usual Suspects but should we not be allowed to talk about how Kevin Spacey is Keyser Söze just because some people have yet to rent it.
Oops.
What then is the statute of limitations about leaking important pop-culture plot points?
By the way, I finished the book yesterday. Loved it. SPOILER ALERT!
In the end Don Corleone dies and Michael becomes the new Godfather. Fredo get's whacked, ET goes home and Darth Vader is really Harry's father.
Posted by Humble on August 1, 2007 @ 10:33|Permalink
Nice people checking in.
While I've been out running around pimping my book and flying GSIN some of you have left me some notes.
Thanks people. I appreciate your concern/thoughts/opinions and more are always welcome.
Here's a sample or two from you.
Message: A few random thoughts from Fred E.
I cannot believe it has been a year...it took me a long time to find a new station to listen to. Finally settled on CFNY but not sure my kids should listen to Dean! May have to go back to Andy Barrie (spent the time you were on a.m. days there).
That was quite a shock to hear about Andy. Never met him but sounds like a stand up guy.
I have given up watching new shows until the second season. Got hooked on Studio 60...CANCELLED. Got hooked on Black Donnellys...CANCELLED. Got hooked on Love Monkey last year...CANCELLED.
Berkshire stock actually trades at over 100K USâ ¦Warren created Baby Berkshires for those of us without a lot of idle cash. Each 100K share is convertible into 30 baby shares.
Saw you driving one day...how do you like the Volvo?
I think you should do a slime that companies do. I bet you could have a 3 volume set.
Thanks FredE.
Slime comment from Tina
Message: Hi: I just picked up your book and loved it. It make me realize how incredibly f***** up men are - its enough to make me want to be a lesbian - but of course, my lesbian friends tell me it does not work that way :)
I wanted to send in my own SLIME story - but I have so many that I cannot figure out which to send you - sad, very sad.
Of course, now that I read your book, I want to know when the next 5 are coming out!!!!
Thanks and actually, for a guy - you are somewhat acceptable.
Thanks Tina, I feel somewhat acceptable.
Longtime Pal Ted Nesbitt says,
Message: Miss you on the Toronto airwaves!
I had some station on the other day, and they dragged out an "old" Pennzoil ad---there were your silvery pipes all over it----ahhh, memories.
So, besides this, what is Humble doing with himself these days? I'm still selling equipment and materials to do "signs" in the graphics business, traveling more and more, spending less time in Toronto all the time.
Haven't been back to Moose Jaw in awhile, but it's on the agenda for later this fall.
Thanks for all the great memories I have from you and Freddie on the air over the years. Anything I can ever do for you, let me know---promo stickers, helping out with a golf tournament with signage, you let me know. It's the least I can do for all the laughter (and some grease) you provided yours truly with over the years.
Thanks Ted I miss you on the Toronto Airwaves too.
Posted by Humble on July 31, 2007 @ 10:53|Permalink
Hey Nice People. Thanks.
Some thoughts on Not working for a year.
I am bored. Pleasantly.
12 months. That's a lot of sleep-ins.
I love my family. They're getting sick of me.
I still can't stay up very late but some nights I'm awake till 11pm!
I used to worry a lot but then that got boring too.
People have stopped asking me what happened and I've started to forget.
I've met a lot of other people that have been fired. Fired people love to tell me that I won't be fired forever. It just feels that way.
Being at home has been fun but I also need to have a place to go sometimes.
When you don't have a job, some people don't call you back anymore. I won't forget them though.
Meth isn't as much fun in month 12. That was a joke just to see if you were still reading.
I hardly listen to the Radio anymore. It sort of bugs me.
I'm not as bitter as I might be but it's something I have to watch it. The meth helps with that.
Finally I hope I'm not a writing a similar entry 12 months from now. That would suck.
I received a few nice notes from people on my "Anniversary."
"...it has been a year without anything good to listen to each and every morning! I'm still bitter about the whole thing!!!! Can't wait to hear more of you soon Howard.
Hey what happened with that big announcement?!?!"
Posted by: Jackie
"Morning radio has not been the same since they let you go." Posted by: Dave
"Howard, enjoy your time with your young family. I missed out. Now, I have more time for them but, they have no time for me.(all grown up)Miss you and Fred. I get my fix once in a while and put on #1 in '97.?"
Posted by Humble on July 17, 2007 @ 14:49|Permalink
Isn't It Ironic. Dontcha think?
Thanks to my buddy Marc G, I got the heads up on a sweet deal that Future Shop was having on a Garmin Street Pilot GPS. About a hundred dollars or so less than the full pop, so I ordered it.
Paid the extra so I'd get it asap.
Well that hasn't worked out yet.
I called Canada post with my tracking number and they said it was created online and the computer read it but it actually hadn't been shipped.
Then I called Future Shop and spoke to a nice person who told me they can't declare it "lost in shipping" until 4 business days have elapsed.
Huh?? I asked why not check on it's status now but the FS lady told me it may arrive today and it it doesn't I'm supposed to call Friday.
But, I said again, why not check on it now?
This seemed to annoy the nice FS lady who didn't seem to understand why I wasn't getting the fact that it isn't lost in shipping and checkable until day 4.
Forget the fact that I paid for Express Shipping thinking that the thing was supposed to be here Tuesday.
Now I'm working for Future Shop cause I have to call tomorrow to declare a Shipping Emergency.
I tell this to annoyed FS lady and this does little to un-annoy her.
I say isn't it ironic that you can't locate my GPS. Maybe if you had GPS-locater-GPS you would know where it is.
She doesn't see the irony.
Oh well, at least it will give me something to do Friday.
By the way for you people that have been asking...this is what I've been doing now that I have no real job.
Poop pump down, I repeat the poop pump is pooched. (Actually I meant to write "Pool pump down, I repeat the Pool pump is pooched, but I think poop pump is funnier.) My 1Hp Hayward is overheating and shutting itself down which apparently is a sure sign that the motor needs replacing. The pool company that I will not name(Rhymes with Pioneer) doesn't repair them and in fact recommends replacing them instead. No kidding.
Anyone who has a pool knows it's all the after market gunk you buy where all these pool companies really make their dough.
I rarely leave the pool store having spent less than 30 bucks.
To be fair to The Pool Company, I've done some research and it is about time for a new pump.
I mean who doesn't want a new pump once in a while? Sure the old Pump is good and reliable and knows exactly how to turn you on and off but a New Pump is well New.
Okay what am I talking about again?
Saw Die Harder with Bruce Willis and the Apple commercial guy (Justin something) and it was good. It wasn't Reservoir Dogs but it was better than Die Hard 3. That's gotta count for something.
Saw Nancy Drew with uh some actors. I was pleasantly surprised that it didn't suck and make me want to vomit like a lot of these live action kid-flicks. (Narnia, Spy Kids etc.) I dug Nancy and her pal Ned and their adventures in Sleuthing and if you have age-appropriate kids do this flick.
Saw another episode of Entourage last night. I have mentioned from time to time it's one of my PVR choices and it is only getting better. Jeremy Piven is the man and last night Canuck Maury Chaykin was guesting and the whole thing was good. Check it out on TMN and go get the DVD's to catch up.
Also saw another episode of my new fav The Flight of the Conchords. I've mentioned this New Zealand comedy duo before and the show is very funny.
Once again a little taste of these dudes.
Enjoy.
Some nice comments in response to this little entry about my last day on the Mix.
I sure hope it's not another year off for you. You need to be on the radio ane I need to hear you.
Happy Canada Day to you and your family.
Posted by: james edgar
We need to have you on the radio. Of course when you get another radio gig, please promise you’ll continue this blog. Have a great holiday weekend!
Posted by: Roger
Hope to hear you back on the radio soon.
Posted by: Dave
My Favorite.
..There's always the porn industry...
Posted by: Brenda's Boyfriend from Cambridge
Posted by Humble on July 3, 2007 @ 11:53|Permalink
Some Sports Stuff.
Hockey.
Leafs announce they are looking for an executive to mentor current GM John Ferguson. Really.
Well isn't that just the vote of confidence that all of us are looking for.
They stated his lack of experience and age as the reason the Board and management made the decision. They also added, unnecessarily, that they won't be talking about extending his contract any time soon.
Wrestling
That Chris Benoit murder-suicide is just a sad, weird story. He kills his wife and 7 year old and then hangs himself.
Yesterday they revealed that he may have killed his little boy by using a "choke-hold" as opposed to strangling him in a conventional way.
I thought that maybe we could have all done without that bit of information. I don't need to know in what manner he murdered a 7 year old, I really don't.
Basketball
NBA draft is today. I'm guessing it won't get the same TV numbers as the Hockey draft last week but here's a cool stat.
The minimum value of a guaranteed contract for the 30th pick (last in the first round) $1,599,800.
The minimum value of a guaranteed contract for the 31st pick.(first in the 2nd round) $0
$0!
Boy would that suck large to the tune of 1.5 mil. Oops.
Golf
Tiger's going back to work. Two weeks after his Hot Swedish Wife popped out the Tiger-Baby, Daddy returns to the PGA tour at the AT&T July 5-8. This is an event that he is hosting so I guess he can't miss it. He's only the 3rd player alongside Jack and Arnie that have ever hosted a PGA tour stop.
Good company to be in cause in their day those other 2 guys didn't suck.
As for post-baby Tiger?
Little Trivia, Jack Nicklaus only won 18 Majors after he had his first kid.
Posted by Humble on June 28, 2007 @ 09:13|Permalink
Nashville to Hamilton with Complications.
Like you, I want the Rim dude who's name I find unpronounceable when I read it, to buy Nashville and move it to Hamilton.
Jim Balsillie (???) should just buy the crappy franchise and move it a place where the population would embrace it and joy and happiness would be spread.
Simple right?
Apparently not and it has everything to do with the Dastardly Midget Gary Bettman and of course the Evil Empire of MLSE.
I read Dave Perkins in the Star today and he made some sense of the whole mess for me.
I like Dave.
He's one of the few local guys that writes about Golf without making me want to spit.
Today he put the whole MLSE possible-objections into perspective and again no spitting.
The benefits to the NHL of a moribund franchise being sold for $238 million are obvious enough to suggest a deal eventually happens. The price clearly raises the value of the other 29 franchises and don't think Balsillie hadn't counted on that carrot when he made his offer. Plus, if Gary Bettman's NHL truly is thinking of expanding to two more U.S. cities that don't (and won't) care about hockey, the Predators' price will swell the next expansion fees.
Read the rest of it here.
Posted by Humble on June 26, 2007 @ 09:21|Permalink
Too much homework.
Interesting article in The Star and all over the Radio News today about homework in the To public school systems.
I think kids have too much homework nowadays, considering that I don't remember doing any.
Maybe thats why I'm barely qualified to work at Baskin and Robins. (No I didn't apply.)
Plus tons of projects. Geez if I have to buy any more bristol board I'm going to lose it.
I don't know what the answer is but my buddy Tim Miller's a teacher and a damm good one and I'll bet he knows. He probably did a crap load of homework when he was a kid.
I suspect the not-so-good teachers assign more work out of the classroom cause it's easier than having to teach it, but I doubt that's the deal with all of them. Have a look at this and then come back, I've got more.
Personally I don't buy the argument that parents need to do more but they do have to do some.
No the Leafs haven't signed Tiger, although I'm sure he'd be as effective as say Carlo Coliaccavo.
The big story is that the Leafs have re-singed Mats to a one year contract and Damien Cox thinks that if the team doesn't make the playoff it'll be bye bye Mats and so long GM John Ferg Jr.
Really?
Is the team that bad that making the playoffs would actually be an accomplishment? Wow, I had not idea. I just like mocking them cause it's fun. I didn't realize that they'd gotten themselves to such a level of sucking that getting into the post-season,(which pretty much everybody does) would be a big deal.
Geez I can see why The Leaf Nation was so upset that Ottawa made it the Stanley Cup finals.
Wow, now I feel bad.
Okay, no I don't.
U.S. Open.
Looking forward to it. Love watching pros make pars and bogeys and others.
Tiger will win of course and if he doesn't I'll bet you it'll be somebody you've never heard of.
I'm serious.
The U.S. Open often produces unknowns that have one great week and that's it.
Scott Simpson, Larry Nelson, Hubert Green, then there's Lee Janzen, and Andy North who both won twice!
Not exactly household names.
So it'll be Tiger or ????? or maybe a guy like Retief Goosen. He's won two in the last 6 years.
We all have friends that we see a lot and then we have another category of friends that we don't see as much as we'd like.
This weekend was a confluence of those two groups for me.
From Friday night till Sunday night it was non-stop visiting/drinking.
Friday night Bingo Bob threw a grown-up dinner at his palatial Danforth estate and I got to see
Bingo Bob, Bingo's Hot Wife Laura, Andy Wilson and his Crazy Cute chick Michelle and former
morning show intern Stupid Curtis. Lots of laugh/food/booze, Randee drove home, I fell asleep by the Gardiner.
Saturday afternoon: Hanging with my buddy from BNN/RobTV Lou Schizas and his daughter and my kids. Laughing/swimming/beer/burgers.
That night I saw Surf's Up. Good kid-flick. Not great but not bad.
Sunday: Best pal Stinky and his dog Hogan. Dan Duran and God-son Coltan, my girls and some of their friends.
Lunch, pool, driving range, beers, pool, steaks on the barbecue, red wine, etc. At one point Stinky, Dan and I sang Bohemian Rhapsody for the kids much to the delight of some and the embarrassment of my 12 year old.(In front of her friend no less.)
Sunday night: Best pal Fraser comes over, we watch Sopranos. Beer/TV tension then bizarre discussion with my wife where she disputes that Fraser knows where his wife works. Seriously.
So in the space of 48 hours I pretty much got caught up with a good portion of several sectors of my friends. Summer time is great for that. I'm sure a lot of Canadians have this kind of weekend where we try and squeeze every last drop of fun out of our lives before we go back in to hibernation after labour day.
I just read the Sens were outplayed last night and lost 1-0. I laughed thinking that "Well at least that'll make my Leaf-Fan buddies happy!"
Strange thought huh?
Actually cheering against the only Canadian franchise...actually wanting the Stanly Cup to go to the USA, to make yourself feel better.
That's what I think it is.
It's like if Ottawa loses 4 straight it will somehow make it good for Leaf Fans. "Hah! See they are a crap team that always chokes."
What a load!
Even if Ottawa loses it doesn't take away from the fact that our team:
A) Didn't make the playoffs.
B) Hasn't for a few years.
C) Hasn't played in the Stanly Cup final since we used to give babies cigarettes.
It's really the last point that is important to remember. If Ottawa never wins a game in this series at least they got this far. I know a lot of Leaf supporters who would love to be playing and losing to the Ducks at this point in the "Golf Season!"
Posted by Humble on May 31, 2007 @ 08:48|Permalink
The Leafs and other Crap.
I had some predictable response to my Ottawa stuff. You have to know I don't really care I just write this drivel to get a rise out of Leaf Fans. It's fun.
Basically I said that it's time to get behind the Canadian Team as opposed to one from the US. Apparently there was a comment about how the Ducks have more Canadian born players than the Sens. So what?
It's about where the Team is from.
One team is based in Ontario Canada one is based in California USA.
If both teams were from the US then I could see cheering for the one with the most Canooks but that's not the case.
One team is from our country and that's the one we should be cheering for.
The only reason a lot of you aren't is because it's Ottawa-the Team that used to choke and of course it's jealousy.
Jealousy over that franchise's success and this ones lack of it.
And let's not forget MLSE has raised prices again and once again it won't affect Leaf Fans one iota.
Other Crap.
I've been to Dairy Queen twice in the last couple of weeks for the first time since last summer.
Funny how kids still think going there is a treat. It is for me too.
Last night I had a small Skor-bar Blizzard-awesome-and the week before I had a double-cheese burger. I must tell you the burger was amazing. I haven't had a burger from DQ for a million years but it was very good. I had to hold myself back from having another this week.
I wonder how good a double cheese-burger and Skor-bar Blizzard for dessert would taste?
Speaking of food. Yesterday Randee and I hung out at Remy's rooftop patio and bar in Yorkville for lunch. Cool setting and a great Ceaser salad. Walking back to the car we passed all the new condo developments with signs advertising units..."from $600,000 to 6 million!"
Wow how aggravating would it be to live there? Spending 6 or 7 hundred thousand on an apartment and ending up with the crappiest place and being known as the condos' cheap-asses. "Oh those people, I hear they only spent $900,000 on their place, how gauche."
I came up with a great idea for Yorkville. Somebody should open up an Everything for a Hundred Dollar store. Or a Hundred Buck or Two.
Sens Vs Ducks. Now that's what I'm talking about...
Isn't this the dream match up all hockey fans were looking for? I mean come on, the Anaheim Mighty Ducks a hockey team based on a Disney movie, taking on Canada's Team of Destiny?
Maybe not the classic Leafs vs Montreal tangle that would give the CBC a stiffy. Of course the Leafs would have to make the playoff's first, same with MTL.(I can't remember if the Habs made the playoffs or not, I know they're not playing now.)
Quite the conundrum for us locals though huh? I mean We Are Canadian aren't we, at least that the mythical god Molson taught us.
So the Leaf fans who are loath to cheer for Ottawa(ABO is a well known acronym) are going to be forced into an anti-Canadian position by cheering for the Ducks.
Yeah the Ducks there's a franchise with History.
Yes, I'm just busting on Leaf Fans for fun. Yes, I don't really care one way or another. Yes I only want Ottawa to win to drive Mike Boon bonkers.
Fact is, it's probably a good thing the Leafs won't win the Stanly Cup for yet another year, can you imagine what MLSE would raise the ticket prices to then?
Posted by Humble on May 25, 2007 @ 09:33|Permalink
Let Me Fly Dalton.
Dateline:Dalton McGuinty. Premier Dalton McGuinty has used government aircraft flights worth up to $1 million since taking office in the fall of 2003 to reach destinations as close to Toronto as Hamilton and Niagara.
This just in from the Toronto Star who absolutely love our Premier and want to bath him in warm milk and then pat him dry and cuddle him like a puppy.
This story,is about as close as The Star gets to something negative about DM.
My first thought was, "Who Cares?" the dude is the Premier and let him use the freaking planes.
Then I read more and found out he's hopping around in a sweet-ass Beech King Air350 and which cost about 2 grand an hour to run and he's just going over to like Hamilton and Saint Catherines.
Hell I could fly him for way cheaper.
This is a Beechcraft King Air350.
This is a Cessna Cardinal 177 GSIN. My plane.
GSIN cost's a lot less than 2 grand an hour to operate and I would gladly fly Dallton and a couple of hot government chicks around the Golden HorseShoe. I mean I've got the time and a long as he springs for gas and beers were G2G.
I have interviewed Mr. McGuinty on many occasions and always found him to be a decent, affable fellow. Weird Liberal politics aside, I think it's okay for him to use a plane to go to the odd event, just scale it back a bit and let me be the one to fly.
Posted by Humble on May 17, 2007 @ 10:01|Permalink
2 Comments 2 Different sujbects 2 Equally as passionate.
My buddy Tim sent me this in response to my bit about Jerry Falwell.
Good Bolg about JF...what a bonehead. Gives those who believe in a Loving and Forgiving God the heebeegeebees and a bad rep. He's got no "street cred" in my opinion. And he DON'T speak for me and my faith at all.
“God is Not the problem…it’s His Fan Club” and “The Religious Right is Neither”
These quotes (I think) best sum up the whole realm of self-serving religious fanatics in the world…and it applies to ALL of them (Jew, Muslim, Christian, Sikh, Hindu, etc). God is Good. He is Love. Not all the BS humanity attaches to him. It must make him sick to his stomach to see his named dragged through the mud and attached to all the evil this world done “in his name” (9/11, Crusades, Inquisition, Waco, Palestine/Israel…you get the picture). Imagine how you would feel if some fanatic went and killed a bunch of people and said they did it out of devotion to you? Or because you told them to? Or that you need to hate someone because they are different? The God I believe in reached into the world to make it better. To show how love and acceptance are the way to solve problems. Not jerk people around because you don’t feel good about yourself. In the end, I find that humans do these things not because some higher-power/or some book told them to, but because "they need to find something to hate more than they hate themselves"…so endedth the lesson.
MacKnife weighed in with this after reading my comment about The Senators.
Like Freddie P, I'm a true, blue Leafs fan and when it comes to the playoffs and our beloved Leafs are out golfing, it's ABO (Anybody But Ottawa) for me. Couldn't give a crap that they are the only "Canadian" team left. They are led by the refugee from the Simpsons (Krusty the Klown) even though he has had a haircut, and he ain't Canadian anyway, and I hate the fact that he has a chance to hold the Holy Grail aloft before the Leafs captain, Sundin! Also the Senaturds owner is a traitor to this country anyway, by living abroad most of the year he avoids paying his taxes, so based on that, who really paid for that team, us, the Canadian taxpayer, that's who. And he wants Canadians to support them! Like hell! I will watch each and every game and hope fervently that the Senaturds choke yet again, if not against Buffalo then against whoever they face in the Cup final, and I hope it's Detroit and Hasek, coz they'll chew the Sens up and spit them back out!
GO ABO! GO!
PS Buffalo ain't dead, yet, twitching maybe, but not quite dead. Pray to Jesus for a resurrection!
I was in Waynesburg Pennsylvania this past weekend for some IFR training. More about that above. It's a little town south of Pittsburgh surrounded by green rolling hills and trees and a big coal plant that looks "real purty" all light up at night.
It's a typical little American town and for 3 days we at nothing but typical American food.
Man o Manashevitz.
Denny's, Bob Evans, Red Lobster, a Chinese Buffet and more Bob Evans. At every stop the food is decent the portions are enormous and cheese and fries accompany every meal.
Seriously.
No matter what you order nowadays in the good ol USA it comes with fries and it's smothered in cheese.
Me:"I'd like a ceaser salad please and whats your soup of the day?" Big friendly waitress:"It's cream of 3 kinds of cheese and it comes with fries and gravy." Me: "I'll just have the salad." BFW:"But you have to have the fires and some cheese or I'll lose my job!"
Lately whenever I'm in the States I eat too much and I eat too often. It's like you get down there and see all these different products and go wild.
"Look it's Teriyaki Duck Jerky, let's get some."
It's easy to see why 60% of the country is obese or on their way.
One morning at Denny's I had the Grand Slam Ultimate omelette which would have fed my entire family breakfast for a week.
Of course it was covered in cheese.
Posted by Humble on May 15, 2007 @ 08:31|Permalink
Immature. Very Immature.
Mike Boon and I are getting to be good friend. How do I know? The way any guy knows. Most of our conversation consists of making fun of each other in an infantile and immature way. That's the difference between men and women.
Women make fun of each other to other women behind their backs.
Guys just tell you your an ass-wipe to your face!
The other night MB and I were Google-Chatting and it began thusly. (Yes I said thusly!)
8:00 PM Toronto Mike: you got gill deacon cancelled!
8:16 PM Howard: eat me nerdlinger
8:16 PM Toronto Mike: and it's Gill, not Gil!
8:18 PM Howard: boon, where'd ya go?
8:18 PM Toronto Mike: you logged off for a second
8:18 PM Howard: I didn't mean too. ya ass.
It goes on for quite some time. Longer than you'd think. Check out the rest of this discussion between two 9-year-olds, here.
Amazing. Amazing what we take for granted. The ability to hear and process information in a world that is built for us.
It's a given. When that's taken away it is sobering.
I was only made "pretend deaf" for a short time, an hour or so, but the lessons of the experience will be with me a lot longer.
I had a great day as the Honorary Chair for the CHS the people I met were great, and the VIPs involved were awesome. Singer Michael Burgess, Larry Hyett,- Vice President Retail Sales and Service, TD Bank Financial Group, Bill Stewart-Toronto Fire Chief Dan Duguay-Vice President of CUPE 1750, Joe Sgro-Vice President of Specialized Claims Services Division.
Great guys and very well spoken when it came to the experience. More about that later. Oh yeah Fire Chief Bill has the most powerful handshake I've ever felt. Mines fairly strong, but his is punishing. His says, "I'm the Fire Chief and rest assured, everything will be okay. Now settle down Mister!"
May is hearing awareness month and I urge you to get more information about this astonishing group of people and their organization.
Through the various meetings and correspondence with the people I've met at CHS I'm so glad I got involved. I feel that I'm the one that's benefited. I've been privileged to get a glimpse into a world I knew nothing about and one that is filled with smart, funny and engaging individuals who happened to have an inability to hear but are great listeners!
/
Former RRotD (Regular Reader of the Day for you new peeps) Soccer Mom, seemed to enjoy my "Things I don't care about" piece from yesterday.
She is a funny/cool chick who knows that Daddy likes it when others bring the content.
She wrote her own version called: Who Cares!
Who cares about Scooter Libby and that he told some guy about some chick’s covert job.
What we should care about is the fact his mother hated him enough to call him Scooter
Who cares that Richard Steele told the judge “You just opened up my family to danger you don't understand”. One innocent girl is dead because of you!
Dude’s attitude blows about the whole situation. Like the song says ~ your not so innocent ~ and dude you need to seriously heed those words.
What we should care about is the fact he doesn’t!
Who cares who Anna-Nicole Smith’s baby’s daddy is. It’s all about the cash/possible cash and we can all see it, so baby-daddy ~ don’t step so proud.
Who cares about a picture at City Hall with a bunch of crooks, sorry I mean politicians. If you don’t like where you are sitting/standing or who you are sitting/standing beside, just don’t show up and be listed as an absent, simple problem solved.
Well done Soccer Mom.
As for other potential contributors send your free content to
Youdotheworkforme@Humblehoward.com
Posted by Humble on April 27, 2007 @ 08:12|Permalink
Radio Ratings overview!
I found this article recently about the Radio Ratings in Toronto. (Also a look at Calgary and Montreal)
You might find it interesting. It's from a cool industry site called Cartt.ca.
It's well written, informative and if you're a fan of the business you'll get a good feel for what went down with the recent numbers.
Click and read here.
Enjoy.
Posted by Humble on April 23, 2007 @ 09:50|Permalink
Cho Seung-Hui was one defective unit.
6 Billion plus people on the planet. That's a big factory. Lot's of units and every so often one comes off the assembly line defective.
That's my theory about human beings like Cho Seung-Hui. Defective and poorly wired.
I'm not being flippant. I believe that once in a while our species spits out someone so heinous and awful, what other explanation can there be.
Yesterday's release of the pictures and video showing this guy proved to all of us that he wasn't right in the head, the fact that he'd already been identified as having a mental illness should surprise no one.
This man was known to police, a menace on campus, mentally ill and yet, he could buy a gun.
That's the part that's hard to figure out and will no doubt re-ignite the big American gun debate.
What a sad, sad avoidable tragedy.
I don't know what to say. These things happen with numbing frequency.It's one of the saddest, unexplainable, remarkable phenomenons of the past 40 years.
That's right, this started in 1966 with a shooting on campus in Texas and unfortunately ended for 32 students yesterday at Virginia Tech.
Of course the shooter killed himself. I guess that's what these people want. They want to kill themselves and inflict pain and suffering on others on the way out.
Cowards.
Too bad he didn't have the courage to just end his own life and leave others to live theirs.
I really don't know what to say. Who does?
Don Imus is done.
The 67 year old Shock Jock will be shocking no more and it solves nothing.
His comments, as bizarre and racist as they were, are not the problem.
They merely serve to divert attention from the real racial issues facing America and our society and that's a shame.
The girls on that basketball team should have been offended, but in reality weren't hurt or denied any rights or made to feel like second rate citizens.
Just some stupid comments from an irrelevant old man.
I read an article written by a black journalist who basically said that Don Imus is an easy target for people like Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson. As opposed to addressing the very real and sticky issues that blacks face they get to rally their constituents around an out of touch white guy who said some asinine thing. The journalist made the point that they should be talking about a prison culture that glorifies the Gansta's and makes being educated a bad thing.
I concur.
I also think that watching Matt Lauer get all prickly and indigent grilling Don Imus is a convenient way to divert America's attention away from some other sniggley little concersn. Like the BS war in Iraq, the 60 plus percent of the population that's obese and the environment. Those silly old things.
When a white guy makes a stupid remark it gets overplayed and over-discussed for weeks and in the end changes nothing.
Don Imus is done. For now at least.
Yesterday was David Letterman's 60th birthday and the weird thing is I felt old.
He's been on the air doing his thing for 25 years but for some reason it's his age that's struck me as a gauge of my advancing chronology.
See if he's 60 then I must be getting old too.
Weird huh.
I started watching him a bit on his failed daytime show but I really got into him when he went Late Night in 82. I was hooked.
I loved Carson but this guy was new, fresh and very self-referential.
I was 22 and hosting a kids TV show on CBC Alberta at the time and I ripped him off big-time.
Not so much specific bits but his mannerisms and style. I thought he was the coolest TV dude and I dug whole shows vibe. Larry Bud, The Velcro Wall, Dropping Stuff off Buildings, Paul Shafer and Chris Elliot-the guy who lives under the stairs.
Now he's 60 and I'm 47. I've long given up pretending I was him but I haven't stopped liking his style. I don't watch regularly anymore but when I do I always get a laugh.
David-Freaking-Letterman is 60.
How Freaking -Old Do I Feel?
Here's a classic Letterman interview with Crispin Glover. Years after this I interviewed Crispin and he couldn't have been nicer. Never once tried to kick me in the head.
This is the 90th anniversary of Vimy Ridge.
What?
A place in time, an event, a battle that this country won on our way to a place of prominence and influence on the world stage.
What?
I know a lot of people, myself included, aren't real clear about what exactly Vimy Ridge meant and means for Canadians.
Yesteraday Rudyard Griffiths, (my new favorite columnist named Rudyard) had a great piece in The Star putting it in perspective.
He says, Tomorrow(Today) Canadians celebrate the 90th anniversary of the World War I battle of Vimy Ridge. At Vimy, a 14-kilometre escarpment that sits atop the Douai plain of France, 30,000 Canadian troops achieved not only a stunning military victory over their German adversaries, they also won for Canada the beginning of an independent and influential voice in world affairs.
Who knew.
Read the rest here and then let's not forget this, okay!
While we're at it lets not forget this either. Sad sad day for our country.
Posted by Humble on April 9, 2007 @ 08:31|Permalink
Why does Chris Zelkovich Hate?
CBC's top comic duo just a joke
Chris Zelkovich doesn't like the Don and Ron show. Read the whole mess here.
Well too bad. He thinks that The Corp made a mistake using them to promote HNIC (which they just re-signed) because
A)Ron Maclean is a bad interviewer.
B)Don Cherry is a redneck.
C)A is wrong, B is Duh.
Ron is just the finest guy/broadcaster you could know. So no discussion Chrissy.
Don's act got old a long time ago but Zelko-Man everyone knows that and yet everyone still watches. So of course CBC is going to highlight them to drive more viewers to the program.
I get that they aren't the only reason people tune in, but they're as close to big time stay-at-home TV stars that we have.
"What's your problem?" I wondered.
"What's your problem?" My wife asked me.
Apparently I had wondered out loud.
Chris says, Ron's is a horrible interviewer and Don Cherry is a Right-Wing redneck. No and so what?
Of course Chris writes for the Toronto Tzar and obviously believes that no one should be a star.
I'd like to hear him interview someone or carry 5 minutes of National TV.
Uh, no.
As I was reading I thought CK must have some other agenda in his jeans and sure enough there it was right at the end of the article.
What this was doing on the public network in the year 2007 is something CBC executives should be asking themselves the next time they use this pair to promote their most profitable franchise.
Aw that's it. He doesn't like them (He's left-they're Not) and thinks the CBC should be more careful with the Public Airwaves.(Power to the People-whatever.)
Sure, then explain the Air Farce.
Randee and I are a little on the low side after our big cruise, so I've been trying to look forward to some things on the horizon.
In no particular order.
Randee's off to Vegas for a dirty girls weekend with her friend Carol. I don't know what these chicks do when they're "On the Road" but I imagine it involves a lot of white wine and then some kind of Girl Play and Tongue-Kissing. My wife thinks I'm disgusting but I'm a guy and that's how we think.
My holy week is coming. Not Easter or Passover but The Masters. I love this tournament and of course I will be hoping Tiger wins. Sorry I don't care if you think he's bad/good for the game or not, I just think it's cool when he's in contention and even better when he wins. My Dad liked Tiger too but truthfully he was a bigger Weir fan.
The Slime that Men Do is on the road again. This coming weekend is our last trade show, something called "Life Fest". This is a big chick show at the Metro convention centre and I have a feeling we're going to move lots of Slime. Of course I thought the same about all the Wedding Shows we did, but I think this could be the one. The book is doing okay and we've got some plans to take it to the States, but this will be the last live sales push until the Fall.
Finally, and this is going to be weird, I'm looking forward to bulk collection day. Seriously.
This week we received The Oakville Bulk Collection 2007 Schedule and our day us June 9.
I don't know if you TO people have this but the city let's you put all your crap out on the curb and they take it away. Actually if it's any good, people drive by and grab it themselves.
"Why look Marg there's a lovely pee-stained sofa, let's take it!"
I'm excited for a couple of reasons.
A)We won't have to have a garage sale.(The last one actually cost me money on an effort vs return basis.)
B)I'm in the mood to purge our basement of a bunch of stuff. My wife thinks this is comical because she claims we don't have anything down there to get rid of, but we do.
So there.
Sure nothing in there is actually a job but I know there's one out there in the future for me too.
Maybe I could get a gig with the Oakville Bulk Collection dudes.
The results show last night came with a few surprises. The biggest for me was that Ryan and Simon are pals in Real Life!
I was also shocked, like many of you with who stayed and who goed.
Here are the latest kids kicked off.
Antonella is gone. Yes.
Sabrina Sloan. No.
Sundance Head No.
Jared Cotter. Yes.
Sanjaya Malakar and Haley Scarnato dodged a big one as most sane people would have picked them to go. Haley, cause she's not so much with the singing and Sanjaya because he's mostly about his hair and freaky eyebrows.
Many put Sabrina Sloan in the top six girls, including Randy Jackson. After her elimination, Randy said “Sabrina should be in that top twelve, dog. She definitely put it down. America got that one wrong I think.” I agree Randy, she definitely put it down dog master.
As for the rest of it, it was just okay for me. I would have like the Sundance kid to hang around just to watch him attempt to dance. Also it was cool seeing Carrie Underwood come back.
It's interesting though how when the Idol-Made stars return to sing they no longer talk to the judges. It's almost like the "You judging me days is Ovah!"
As for Antonella, there's quite a controversy raging over questionable photo's of her on the dagnabbit intranet. (Google them up) There's also some crap coming out of Rosie O'Donnells giant gag-hole about how the show is racist and fatist or some other junk.
All I know is sweet Antonella won't be struggling for company anytime soon. Why here's a shot of her and one of her friendlies now.
I get several comments a day that make doing this more than just a break from staring into the abyss.
Oh come on Howard, you say, surely your life is rich, full and brimming with learning, growth and evolution.
To that I say, Yes.
Yes cause Mondays' are Prison Break, Tuesdays-American Idol, Wednesdays-More Idol, Thursday-results show, Friday night, Saturday night-drink to excess, Sunday-watch golf.
That's a full existence is it not?
Sure there are days that I wonder what lessons I can learn from such abject failure but I'm confident those learnings will come. I just hope they hurry the hell up.
The last couple of days the kids coming to HH.com have been liking the funny and that makes a fella feel like changing his pants.
(I just noticed I've been wearing the same pants all week. Changed my gitch, but I've been keeping it real with the same jeans.)
In response to the latest FAQ's Timmy says:
Its humour like this that we NEED back on the radio again. Have you
listened to the crap out there? I almost had an instantaneous bout of
insomnia (in my car...not a good thing) when the JACK FM DJs came on the
air yesterday!
Coconuts mentioned:
Hello Humble,
Nice to still enjoy your humour, even though it's through
your "weeb" site and not on the radio. I appreciate the fact that I can still be kept informed to your where-abouts
so some-day maybe we can enjoy all the hi-jinx on the radio. How 'bout one of those red-neck stations in Hamilton? Wait a minute that won't work your jokes might go over their heads.
And Jackie said:
That was funny! Even in type your timing in the back and forth banter is
bang on - even when you are bantering with yourself! Oh my that comment
could go either way!
In an effort to be inclusive I have decided this site needs to frequently update our FAQ section so that everyone who comes is in on the joke(s)!
I don't know how many program directors sat across from me and chastised me for doing some bit that was too "inside!"
So just like the big web sites here are some more FAQ's.
How many program directors chastised you for being too "inside?" I don't know. What publishing platform do you use and who maintains it? I work with MoveableType and Mike Boon answers any question I may have. Who is Mike Boon? Ask him. Describe a typical day. I wake up, eat some porridge, stare at the computer screen and wait for the phone to ring. Is that it? Some days I nap so I can stay up and watch American Idol. The guys suck and Paula is a retard. Do you have any idea when you will work again? By "work" do you mean, leave the house, go some where and get paid money? Yes. No. Are you worried? No. I find the drinking helps with that. Are you concerned? No. See above. What is your biggest worry or concern? Uh, if the LCBO goes out of business. Any last thoughts? Only that I'm actually asking and answering questions from myself.
This is a great shot. The women is actually using her child as a shield against the sleet and driving ice pellets.
Thanks mom.
I don't blame her. For a while yesterday afternoon is was ACTUALLY SNOWING SIDEWAYS!
(you know I'm serious cause I put on the cap lock.)
I had just finished gorging myself on Dim Sum, (some hargow, sumai, wings, pork ribs in black bean sauce and won ton soup. Yum Mi.) when it started to snow.
At first it was just snow, then it turned to an icy snow/rain/sleet mixture.
What really sucked was the wind. It was blowing the crap sideways and making it almost impossible to be outside.
I of course had to stop for gas, cause G*D knows we're apparently running out of that, and I was out of my car for approximately $35 dollars worth.
Just then the ice shards started to beat down upon my face. I was stumbling wildly as I tried to hang on to the hose.
I lost control and starting spraying gas everywhere when all of a sudden an SUV skidded on the ice bashing into my vehicle causing a spark and igniting the petrol. Both cars exploded and the entire station burst into a giant ball of fire!
Okay, everything from "I lost control to giant ball of fire" is bull. But it was so windy with the sleet and shards of sideways ice I thought it could happen.
Maybe I was just woozy from the Dim Sum.
Posted by Humble on March 2, 2007 @ 09:23|Permalink
Too Close to Home Day 2
Yesterday I wrote about a situation at a High School near me that had an "incident" featuring some ass who wrote threatening messages about harming other kids.
The situation is being handled, the school and the local board are investigating, but I'm telling you it's freaking out a lot of people around here.
This is a very quiet, middle-class neighborhood and the school is reputed to be amongst the 10 best in the country.
My little note got quite a bit of reaction.
One of my pals and a regular commenter here at HH.com is a Brampton teacher named Tim Miller.
He and I have become friends over the last couple of years and he's a smart and thoughtful fellow who loves teaching. I've seen him in the classroom and believe me you'd want your kids to be taught by him.
He says.
Humble...
With regards to the Iroquois incident...
Part of me wants to say "welcome to my world". But that is flippant and only seems to confirm the misguided perception that the media seems bent on portraying that schools are bastions of violence/racsim/drugs/etc and full of Ganstas and ner-do-wells.
The truth of the matter is that they are bastions of learning and full of amazing young people.
I feel absolutely safe in my job. Mind you, I am a teacher so I would probably be the last one to be threatened anyway, so perhaps my view is skewed...?
However,
Come to school messed up.
Home...society is the prob, full of denial
the school IS safe
Handful of idiots...a mass of good and great kids....why not focus on them...not good press.
Another point came from Soccer Mom.
My son went to Iroquois, last year he graduated and is now attending
college, what an amazing school. He still has many friends there and this
news scared me to death. My questions have to be ~ this Grade 9 student who
"found" the message, are they sure he was not the one who wrote the
message? This threat is being taken very serious and now seems to have been
averted from this school but what about other schools in the area, what is
being done to make sure that if this was/is a viable threat and can?t
happen at The Ridge, will this individual(s) choose another school in the
area? I went into my daughters school (which is walking distance due
south) to find out what is being done to protect them. I was assured
precisions were being taken, but I am still really rocked by this. I was
talking to someone who commented "Do you think the Chief of Police will let
anything happen in the area?" Words of little comfort. Sick but reality
are the days when our children have to practice lockdown
Just got a note from my buddy Shane. Check out his perspective here.
Posted by Humble on February 23, 2007 @ 08:44|Permalink
Too Close to Home.
You may heard this story on the news yesterday.
At an Oakville High School a "threatening message" was discovered in one of it's bathrooms. The idiots who wrote it warned that they planned to harm some other students on Friday Feb 23rd.
The school is Iroquois Ridge and is consistently ranked in the top 10 high schools in Canada.
It's located in my neighborhood and my 12 year old will be going there in less than 2 years for grade 9.
Great. Like we're not all worried about kids enough, a couple of dick-heads who I'm sure are just being bigger dick-heads, have got us all stirred up. My kid doesn't even go there yet and I'm concerned, what about the parents of the children who are there now?
When we were young people did stupid crap too. Grafitti, smoking, some drugs, getting girls pregnant..(btw I'm not referring to me...okay I got knocked up in grade 10)
But all of this was in an era before Columbine and other school shootings. So when modern day high school losers write they're going to harm children in a school on a certain day people take them seriously.
Too bad it's come to this but it has.
The police are on it and the school is very very concerned.
Hopefully this just turns out to be a big hoax and that G*d forbid any harm comes to these kids.
But the threat and worry? A little too close to home for me.
Britney Spears has been ridiculed for everything from her 55-hour first marriage to backup-dancer second husband and her recent pantyless partying escapades. Now that she's entered rehab, though, the joke is over.
I agree. This girl is in trouble and on a downward spiral. It's easy to make Britney jokes but since the weekend all I feel is sorry for this kid.
That's what she is. A 25 year-old spoiled child who's got some major problems and is in need of some major help.
Hopefully this will be it.
Maybe I feel this way because of having daughters. Maybe not being on the air gives you a bit of perspective about what is Celebrity Jokey Joke material and what is just pathetic.
I know if I was on the air I'd probably be doing all sorts of "Britney Bits," but as a guy with a couple of girl children, I just feel bad for her.
A guy I really admire Craig Ferguson of the Late Late show said it best.
"For me, comedy should have a certain amount of joy in it," he told viewers Monday. "It should be about attacking the powerful _ the politicians, the Trumps, the blowhards _ going after them. We shouldn't be attacking the vulnerable."
Posted by Humble on February 21, 2007 @ 09:54|Permalink
The Leaf Thing Blew.
I guess the big Leaf 40th anniversary sort of sucked.
I didn't watch it but the Star and a bunch of other sources said it was underwhelming at best.
Mike Boon had a nice perspective on the Suckage.
Myself I didn't watch it. I asked Mike earlier in the day to remind me but then I quickly forgot.
Here's a secret. I could never stand the Leafs. I used to cheer for them somewhat, cause they were the hometown team and it seemed the right thing to do, although I made no bones about really liking the Bruins.
The fact is I grew up a Bruin fan and hated the Habs and the Leafs.
In Western Canada all we ever saw on Saturday nights were the Leafs and Habs and whomever they were playing.
It used to drive my Dad nuts at how the announcers were such homers.
The joke was that anyone could beat the Leafs 8-1 and all 3 stars would be from Toronto.
I miss a lot of things about my old job. Pretending to give a crap about the Leafs isn't one of them.
Now the Argo's. Those guys I really liked.
Posted by Humble on February 19, 2007 @ 08:20|Permalink
Pay Per View on a Cell Phone?
Your kidding, right?
Your not. Okay what up?
Mobile Movies is available to Bell Mobility subscribers as part of Fun Bundles. Subscribers can pick from three packages for their phone, which include text messaging, caller ID and Internet browsing. Subscribers pay $5.99 for each movie download on top of subscription fees for Internet access.
It's only a matter of time before there's an audience for cellphone movies, said Kevin Restivo, a telecom analyst with Toronto-based SeaBoard Group. "As handset screen resolution improves, and screen sizes enlarge, such services will grow dramatically.''
No that won't be too irritating. Forget some Blue Tooth idiot yelling into the air while carrying on a conversation while your trying to eat lunch, how bout Movie Phone Dude. He's staring into his phone and laughing at Anchor Man in the middle of your meal.
I'm sure it'll catch on. The question...how bored have we all become?
Have a long commute on the Go Train, hmmmm no mp3, no movie to watch, ...hey a book?
It won't be long before you'll be able to download that.
Posted by Humble on February 16, 2007 @ 08:12|Permalink
Hey Nice People thanks for the Notes
The Podcast of Love is up and it seem people like it. Why wouldn't they with so much crapola on the Radio these days.
If you haven't heard it...go HERE.
The response has been very nice.
Message: Great job with the last podcast! I liked that you guys got a little serious and thoughtful a bit, balanced perfectly with the right amount of your humour. I get almost saddened whenever one of these podcasts come to an end, not knowing when the next one will be there to listen to.
By the way, I do download it to my iPod, and then dock my iPod with my clock radio next to my pillow. So, listening to you guys is almost the same as when I used to wake up to you.
Cool.
Hey, are you eventually going to have a public event where you present the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation with a big cardboard cheque?
Yes I will be giving them a cheque hopefully by the end of this month or early in March.
Take care.
Riaz
Message: Dear Howard and Fred,
Loved the podcast... I listened to Q107 since you both thought it was a good place to listen in the a.m. NOT EVER CLOSE to how much I enjoy you both. I MISS YOU. Please keep doing the podcasts. Here is wishing you both, funny and talented people great success in 2007.
Lisa (fan since the early 80's)
Your Nice Lisa
Podcasts are great but I agree with the other posters, it just makes me
miss listening to you guys ever more than I already do. When are you coming
back on the air? Heck, they just got a new morning show on Jack, why on
Earth didn't they hire a decent morning team, i.e. you guys!?
Hmmm I don't know. Maybe that's not what they were looking for!
Great Weekend. Signed books, met a bunch of nice people and some old friends dropped by.
At one Chapters Trevor Boris, funny boy and new pal from the Gill Deacon show showed up...at another my Dentist Dr. Eisner. My Sister-in-law was with my beautiful niece, saw me at Indigo YorkDale and made a Pity Purchase. Which was nice.
This writer Steve Liddell dropped by to keep me company and to commiserate about how tough it is to sell a book. His novel is the very funny Honest Lee, ask for it.
The most bizarre encounter was meeting, selling and signing a book for Moses Znaimer, yeah that guy from CityTV now with Classical 96.3
The other people I enjoyed meeting at several signings were the ones who wanted to know where the Biography section was, if the store had a more extensive CD area and I especially enjoyed the encounter with the person who was pissed off that I didn't know where a Pet store was. Ah the joys of being a Canadian Author.
Hey Go to this Website! Seriously, click on the Plane.
My friend Jackie DeKnock, hot wife of Dan Duran and Mother of my amazing godson Colten, has a great site for those looking for a unique culinary/travel experience. It's called Gourmet Safari and not only is it full of great travel opportunities it's also a great resource.
This from her site.
If you are looking for a really unique Valentines Day gift you cannot go wrong with this V-Day Gift.
Forget the traditional roses this year (not that we would mind). What better gift than the gift of food adventure travel for the food and wine lover who has absolutely everything! Gourmet Safari Culinary Discovery Gift Certificates can be purchased in any denomination and can be applied to any culinary vacation or cooking class. Fine food, fine wines, fine times are just an email away, contact us today to purchase your gift certificate -the ultimate gift of food & travel culinary discovery. How romantic is that...
Wishing you a Happy Valentines Day.
Go to GourmetSafari.com. Go. Go now and Go often. Of course, don't forget to come back!
Posted by Humble on February 9, 2007 @ 07:22|Permalink
Some Great feedback
A few entries the past week got a bit of interesting response.
For starters...I referenced these wing-dings again
and got the following.
J Turner definitely has issues. How can you turn around the fact that you're donating money to Breast Cancer (affecting 1 in 9 women) into a bad thing?!?!? Besides, the title is "The Slime that Men Do" not "The Slime that ALL Men Do". Relax, buddy boy, there are plenty of good ones out there-I'm married to one. Similarly, there are many women out there who are equally slimy. This guy's got major issues as Gary said-kind of frightening that there are people out there like this.
I couldn't agree more. But I do like the fact that Men's Activisim are all stirred up.
I posted a review of Little Mosque on the Prairie. I didn't like it that much and a few people chimed in.
Also, while at times funny, I do wonder about how "real" the situation is. I once saw a show about how the Nazis made two propaganda films about the conflict between the British and the Irish. The films, at least according to those who were interviewed who had seen them were quite good. The only problem was that the people in the movies were not Irish. What I mean by that was that the culture of the Irish portrayed in the films in no way reflected actual Irish culture as I guess the Germans who wrote, produced, and acted in the movies never took the time to get to understand the traditions and feel of the Irish people. It just wasn't important to them because in the end it had nothing to do with the Irish. It was as one commentator of the movies said "Germans talking to Germans".
And that is kind of what I am getting with the "Little Mosque" show. In the end it isn't really about small town Saskatchewan or Muslim communities living within small town Saskatchewan. In the end what it comes down to is just Liberal Urbanite Canadians talking to Liberal Urbanite Canadians, with their political message being far more important to them than whether or not the situation portrayed reflects a real situation in the country accurately enough.
By the way, why does "The She Mayor" remind me so much of the mayor on South Park
Finally, I wondered yesterday about the Super Bowl hats that the Bears would have had made. What happens to them? Well several people, including my buddy Bruce Barker gave me the scoop.
Hey pal
Just in case no one sent this info to you
for at least the last 5 years the losing team T-shirts and hats from the super bowl ( as well as world series,Stanley cup final etc) are donated to world vision who send them to 3rd world countries
So just think of how many kids in Africa have BUFFALO BILLS SUPER BOWL CHAMPIONS shirts on !!!!!!!
I'm going to be honest, I'm officially sick of winter. I know the ski people are all giddy now that the resorts are humming and all is cool. But not me. I don't like to be cold or have to shovel or clear snow or any of it.
I can't wait for it to warm up.
Yes I'm from Moose Jaw and I should be used to this but there's a reason I don't live there any more and cold is it.
I'm also sick of flying ice sheets coming off of Suv' and Mini-Vans zooming all over the roads.
You know those people that are too busy too clear off the roof, so once the vehicle warms ups, these great giant sheets of ice go sailing all over the rest of us?
Are you one of those people?
Stop that.
I'm was coming home on the Gardiner and these rectangular ice boards are flying at my car and I'm thinking, "Hey Dickus if this ice-plank comes crashing through my windshield, I'll be killed all because your were too lazy to do a little extra pre-drive scraping!! "
Just another thing that irks me about winter. Can we all try a little harder with the Global Warming?
Remember when it used to be nice and everyone was freaking out, babbling about how we were all doomed and winter wasn't going to come ever again?
I'm guessing those people aren't scraping the ice-decks off their Hybrid Mini-Vans.
Posted by Humble on January 29, 2007 @ 11:52|Permalink
Hey...I'll be blogging it up later
Hi.
It's 7:40 am. I've just spent 24 plus hours at a Bridal Show on the weekend and I'm beat.
I've got to drive the baby(this week turning 9!) to school then I've got some LKTYP meetings this morning.
I'll be back this afternoon and I'll bring you up to date with a few things.
I'm doing some neat stuff with the Canadian Hearing Society, Tiger won on the PGA Tour and the Humble and Fred Podcast is still up and running.
See ya later, have a great Monday!
Posted by Humble on January 29, 2007 @ 07:36|Permalink
Happy Birthday to Me
I'm 47 today. I don't feel it. I feel much older and younger at the same time.
I must be old both of my parents have died. I feel young as well because losing my Father has made me feel a bit like a little kid. You want to cry but then you realize you don't have your parents anymore to make you feel better.
Wow. This is why it takes people a long time to grieve and get over the loss of a loved one.
Isn't this just a fun little blog entry.
It's my birthday but to be honest the only thing I can think about is how my Dad won't be calling me today.
I'm told that as time passes these days won't have the same melancholy feel, that in the years to come this type of pain will ease.
But today's my first birthday without him.
I'm 47 today.
I don't feel it.
Older and Younger.
The Humble and Fred PodCast of Hope 2007 is currently Live and ready to listen to Here.
It went up yesterday and already many people have listened and enjoyed. Many of those nice people wrote:
Oh man, THAT WAS A GREAT SHOW!!! YES I'M SHOUTING!!!
I howled at the #1 in '97 reference!! I still have that cd! I still have the beer. I still have the shares, even the original 102 one on photocopied paper! I should scan that one and send it! I have the puck from the Olympic broadcast. So much great, useless CRAP! I got very nostaligic when you mentioned Capt Phil as well.
I'm very, very glad you are doing this. It is truly great to hear you guys again. I laughed so hard at some of this. Been a long time since that happened...
Later, Larry
great hearing your podcast.
tell Fred the Leafs still suck.
you guys sound great!
your pal, Frank
You guys are the best!!!!!!! I loved listening and can't wait for the next
one. It is bitter sweet though - make me miss you each morning even
more!!!
Love to you all!!! Jackie.
Hi guys,
Nice to hear you guys on air (sort of) again. I have been a fan since back
in the 'edge' years, and have followed you to the other stops in your
careers, and am really happy to be able to still list to you guys. Even if
it is just once a month.
It was so upsetting to find out "all the dj's have been given the summer
off" ... HA... when really, it was a discreet way to dismiss, what I and
many of my friends consider to be the best morning show in town.
But like I said, it was great to hear you guys again, and hopefully some
radio station has the sense to bring you back on air. If not, you two,
along with Bob, Dan, Pete and whomever else joins your list of "Hopeful
jobseekers" should pool together and start your own satellite station. I
really believe it would do well.
The podcast's were great, I look forward to February's... just miss the
Humble report... please bring back the humble report. I am sure there are
some comments to be made about the Rosie vs Donald or Rosie vs. Paula crap.
I turned the AFC Championship game on last night and a funny thing happened. A CFL game broke out. Exciting, lots of turnovers, interceptions, very un-NFL-like.
I don't watch a lot of NFL football, okay almost none. But I love the playoffs in almost any sport and last night I decided to give this one a shot.
Here's why. Earlier in the day I read that Peyton Manning, who has already had a Hall of Fame career, had never made it to the SuperBowl. I love sports stories like that. This is all it took for me to immediately want to cheer for the Colts.
Of course because of this they suck in the first half, horrible, especially #18. At one point it looked like Peyton Manning was going to cry.
Then the come back. That was cool. 18 points down to even to back and and forth to Peyton with his head down at the end cause he can't watch and see if Brady is going to pull it out to....Interception and the game is over and the Colts win and Peyton Manning is going to the Superbowl.
I've been a Colts fan at this point for less than 12 hours.
The only problem is I know the The Big Game at The End won't be anywhere near this good.
Posted by Humble on January 22, 2007 @ 08:22|Permalink
Farting in Public-revisited.
Yes I'm sick..I'm sweating like I'm coming off Heroin. Am I? You all would tell me wouldn't you?
Some dude name Lukenstien sent me this as at tribute to me farting at a grown ups dinner party.
Posted by Humble on January 17, 2007 @ 14:15|Permalink
You can't Fart at a dinner Party?
The only thing I like about Malls is you can fart at will. Just let them go as your walking along. I think everybody farts in Malls...don't you?
You can fart at a Mall.
You can not fart at a dinner party.
I did, now I'm The Guy who Farted at our Dinner Party.
I was at our very good friends The Lumby's on Saturday night and we were having a lovely time talking about this and that and the other thing. The food was good and the wine did flow and at one point I may have lifted my right cheek and squeezed out some air.
I said may have because I'm trying to maintain a degree of denial.
I thought there was a sufficient level of covering noise and that no one could possibly hear my toot.
Plus, there were three large dogs should any smell visit upon us and several children I could blame.
But nooooooo. All conversation stopped.
All except my wife. "Did you fart?" she inquired?
I looked horrified.
"What are you talking about? I would never fart at a dinner party! It must be the dogs/children."
At this point the party goers all ganged up on me and berated me for my foul behavior.
I continued to deny like OJ and tried to change the subject.
"I'm telling you I didn't fart..now who made this delicious cous cous?"
We didn't actually have any cous cous but I thought that might throw them off!
The discussion moved on to girls tongue-kissing ( a particular favorite of many boys) but a barrier had been broken. Some social covenant had been breached.
I may or may not have Farted at a grown up Dinner Party. Too bad we weren't eating at a Mall.
Yeahhhhhhhh Ice pellets.
Yaaaaaaaaaa Freezing rain.
Yaaaaaaaaaa Traffic/2hours on the QEW/Go train stopped/Cars in Ditches.
Is this what we've all been pining for?
Not me. Sorry. I know... BUT WHAT ABOUT THE SKIING?
Yes I'm happy for winter North of Highway 7, but it can go suck itself in my neighborhood!
I liked the old Winter we were having. Remember that one. Where you could go outside in your pajama's and get the newspaper and sip your coffee and wave at passersby.
(BTW I don't wear pajamas but if I did the old Winter was warm enough to wear them outdoors. As everyone knows I sleep in a spider man thong and hockey shin pads.)
The good news is traditionally the apex of the Winter weather is around the 30th of January, after that it typically starts to trend warmer. So really we only have about 2 more weeks of this shite and we're home free.
But for those of you that have already forgotten please enjoy the following illustration.
Old Winter vs New Winter.
Old Winter New Winter
Posted by Humble on January 16, 2007 @ 07:46|Permalink
When Did the Raptors STop Sucking?
I'm going to a Raptors game on Sunday for the first time this year, in fact for the first time in many years. I must admit I was shocked to look at the standings today and see that they are in fact no longer sucking the big one.
Is this new?
I know I've been a bit preoccupied, but have they been "not sucking" for some time now.
Weren't they like almost winless last year?
I see they have won 15 and lost 19 so the other teams in their division must be crap too, but still it's cool to see that they've turned things around after many suck-filled years.
Funny how being unemployed allows certain aspects of the culture to just drift by without notice.
The Leafs still suck don't they?
Greetings, Terrans:
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.
I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that Canada is necessarily great, or greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
Disclaimer: No tree or animal was harmed in the sending of this message; however, a significant number of electrons were slightly inconvenienced.
Posted by Humble on December 22, 2006 @ 08:10|Permalink
Things to say/not to say when people die.
I was answering an e-mail today from a friend who's Father just died. I know how she feels and so I wrote,"Sorry to hear about your Dad."
I am sorry to hear about your father is I think a nice way to say what you know is tough to express.
I know everyone says that and it's because we/they don't know what else to say.
I don't mind "I'm sorry to hear about your father...."
I like it better than "Sorry about your father..." You'll hear that a lot, as if the person had something to do with it..
Whenever I hear this I always feel like saying, "Why are you sorry, did you kill him?"
Also I'm not big on.."I hear you lost your father." No we didn't lose him, we know where he is, he's just not alive anymore!
It's all part of the whole loved one is dead/now your grieving package. I know it well.
As I said to my friend, "I hope your pain/sorrow/ect passes easily, even though I know there will be times when it won't."
Posted by Humble on December 20, 2006 @ 07:29|Permalink
Chick Mags
I realize I don't know much about Women. I don't think any man does...how could we when there's so much information and most of us don't read Chick magazines.
I was looking through some of Randee's mags' recently and holy crap there's a lot of stuff going on.
"Lengthen the life of new panty hose!"
"Snack on Pineapple to soothe sore muscles!"
"Ease earaches by pouring warm table salt into a gym sock!"
These are just from one page. Women have so many secrets and they love to share little tid-bits amongst themselves. That's why their pantyhose last so long and their gym clothes aren't stinky.
("reader tip-No more stinky gym clothes!")
My wife also has O. The Oprah Magazine. Fred has made this point to me on several occasions-Oprah's make-up person should be the highest paid member of her staff.
Man she looks good. Perfect skin, eyes and lips. Then you see the odd shot of her on her show without make-up and she looks more like Fred than Oprah.
(I just occurred to me that this is the second entry today that contains Oprah references...Oh well, you should know, I dig her and would give part of my left nut to get my book on her little chat show.)
Her Chick-Mag is full of info.
"Perfect presents....NO more Diets!...The Little Haircut That Could!" (that could what, would be my question)
The big focus seems to be "We've got answers to life's stickiest situations!"
Really. Like what you may ask?
What to do if someone...
-Flirts with your husband.(Please flirt with me.)
-Never pays you back.(Steal their car.)
-Gives you a hideous gift.(Sell it.)
-Takes credit for your idea.(Give them a hideous gift.)
I think I'll go back to my golf magazines where the articles deal with much more vital issues like getting 20 more yards off the tee and curing my slice.
Posted by Humble on December 17, 2006 @ 09:52|Permalink
Fast Food in the News
Just finished reading a good article in Macleans mag about the City of New York banning the use of trans fatty acids in restaurant food by July 1 2008. As they say it's part of a fundamental shift in the way fast-food chains do business-one of the biggest transformations the industry has ever seen.
Apparently McDonalds is having a tough time replicating their unique French Fry taste arguably the most craved fast food on the planet. No kidding. I haven't eaten Mcfood for a while but I can clearly remember the salty taste and shape.
Freddie has an interesting bit about fast food places on his site today.
Strangely enough my daughter Charlie and I went to Harveys for lunch today. I had the double-bacon cheeseburger and poutine. I know it's no good for me but dam it tasted great.
French fries, gravy and melted cheese are like crazy comfort food. I think I've added on some "grieving pounds" in the last few weeks for sure.
I don't know what the trans-fatty acid count for that lunch was but it was way worth it.
Posted by Humble on December 15, 2006 @ 19:12|Permalink
This Week Xmas seems to be on your minds
I thought I'd show you a couple of comments that have come in recently, hmmmm a theme seems to be developing.
Howard: You and Fred should get together and have another Humble and Fred Christmas party. You both must have a lot of contacts who can arrange for a location. Word would get out quickly over both your websites, as well as having a few of your on-air buddies direct people to your sites. Imagine the number of books you would sell. Think of the networking possibilities, if you get people in the industry to help. Something to think about quickly.
Which got this response.
What a great idea to reunite the famous HUMBLE AND FRED for another great
christmas party. Do it!!!! Do it now!!!!
More of the same!
Message: Hi Howard: I still hate the fact that you and Fred are not on the radio!! I do miss the CFNY days especially. I listened to your December 5th postings of the old Christmas jingles. That brought back great memories!! Christmas Eve day always started off listening to you and Fred while lounging in bed. There was never a real hurry to get into work since that day was mostly about going in and wishing your co workers a Merry Christmas and maybe having a beer at 11AM!!! Thanks for bringing back those gr
eat memories. Now with three children Christmas is a little more hectic(and more fun) and lounging around in bed is no longer an option but I will always have the fond memories. I would love to hear more!!!
I look forward to hearing you and Fred on the air soon.
Cheers,
Stephen
Finally this suggestion.
I never made it to a Xmas show but loved listening to it. Maybe a bunch of
us can just meet at a restaurant at some un-godly time in the morning and
re-create it? See if BNL will come kay?
Thanks for all your comments and suggestions. I will only answer by saying this. You never know, you just never know.
Dec 8 1980. I'm doing my show prep for the all night show at CKLG in Vancouver. I'm in the newsroom getting ready for the show when I hear the news.
John Lennon is dead.
I don't know what to do.
The news director calls and I hear some shouting between the news guy and him.
I get a call from our music director.
I'm to play nothing but Beatles songs all night long.
Okay. Nothing but 2 to 2.5 minutes songs for 6 hours and no sweeps.
I learned more about the Beatles that night than I had in the 20 years prior. BTW I was 20 years old.
All night long 18 songs an hour, I talked about John Lennon and took calls about the Beatles, Lennon and how this was affecting the listeners.
It was one of those "Where were you" nights that I'll never forget.
Dec 8, 1980 All night Show CKLG Vancouver.
Years later I was in New York with a women I had met on holidays. (long story, before I was married.)
We arranged to meet and she picked me up late one night at LaGaurdia. We went to bed at her place on the Upper West side. The next morning I looked out her window and across the street.
It gave me chills. I said, "How come I know that aprartment"
"Because that's The Dakota," she replied.
It was eerie. Like being at the grassy knoll for another generation.
Every time I go back to New York I invariably find some reason to go up and pass by the building.
Addicted to the spotlight. That's OJ's thing. That and the fact that he hacked up his wife and her pal and can't seem to remember that HE DID IT!
So now he's going to be releasing a book where he is going to give us his version of the killing, if he did it???
Is this not the most bizarre thing you've heard in a long time?
"Yes, OJ is going to reveal what he would have done had he actually killed his wife which as we all know he didn't but if he had he'll tell us how!"
How does this get made and then made into a Television Event?
Oh yeah it's America and it's the Fox Network. We're just as guilty, this book will sell millions and more than that will watch. It's our society and our fascination with all things macabre.
But just this once it would be nice for a mass F-U OJ and nobody buy any of it.
Just in case you've forgotten that OJ really did do it. Check this out.
Posted by Humble on November 19, 2006 @ 11:28|Permalink
Radio People I Like...Part 3
I admit I have a bad memory and yes there are Radio People I LIke that I've forgotten. But let me tell you bub, yes I said bub, these Radio People let you know when you've left them off the list. This dude I hung out with in New Orleans at a convention last year Chad Martin from Vibe98.5 in Calgary, is a Radio People I Like, I just forgot about him. Sorry Chad. Here's Chad's picture.
Yesterday I forgot Jessica Baker. I like her and now she's on the list where she belongs.
I had some interesting response to my little bit.
Kyle said, "What about a section for former radio people that wised-up and got out of
the biz and teach high school now? That would be a great section. Hope all
is well Humble!"
Well maybe, but that would be a different list. That wouldn't be Radio People I Liked, that would be Radio People That Wise-up and Got Out of The Business.
Anyway here is today's entry for Radio People I Like (except the ones that I've forgotten that will surely e-mail me and say, hey how come I'm not on your list?)
General.
Gord Robson-talked to him yesterday, real pro.
Dan Williamson, Voice-over G*D!
Pat Holiday, Gm. Hal Blackadar-former Gm now VP.
Great news people/Hot Co-Workers: Silvana Aceto/Jane Brown/Tera Lynne Joe(Cfox 1981-82)
Just Hot Co-Workers-Colleen Rusholme(yes your hot too stu, but in a different way!)
Grace the sales-chick(smoking hot) Andrea from the Edge and this other hot Sales Women from LG way back, who's name I can't remember but who's other stuff is crystal clear.
Cool Jocks
Jeremy Smith, Audie Lyndes, Chris Sheppard,
Mae Potts
Interns
Stupid Stupid, Danger Boy, Shwarma, Scary-Bald-Headed-Pete,
Bingo Bob, Hawk-Lick(his off air name rhymed with that!)
Mike Sullivan(not really an intern just a good guy who hung around a lot)
Chinee Man(long story)
and lots of others who I'm sure I'm gonna hear about but right now I'm drawing a blank.
Today's first oversite not one hour after I posted this.
CFRB's Peter Sherman. I forgot him but now I remembered.
Today's 2nd oversite ....I just received this note, "SNIFF SNIFF
YOU FORGOT YOUR PAL BARKS ON YOUR RADIO LIST !!!!!!"
Yes, you see I can't remember everyone..
Bruce Barker, is not a Radio People I Like
He is a Radio People I Like A LOT!!!
Yesterday I was talking about how I get visits from some very interesting places, Toronto, Guelph and Wilayah Persekutuan, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.
A few people said hey and id-ed themselves.
"Great blog, keep up the good work!
Longtime Humble & Fred listener (from Toronto, eh) Posted by: Richard"
"Humble, keep up the good work it's good to know you're still around
Greetings from Wasaga Beach Posted by: Moose"
"Hey there Howard. I live in Grimsby which just as well be Kuala Lumpur! Great place to setlle, but lousy if you're a bachelor. Love ya man..all the best! (& you, my dad & Bill Shatner are the only men I'm comfortable saying"love ya man"to.
Posted by: Chris K"
David Miller win TO!
This was the shot in the Star today of Mayor Dave smooching Mrs. Mayor.
Here's the shot that Fred usually uses of Mayor Dave smooching something else!
Fred cares more about this stuff than I do and usually has some funny stuff about Mayor Dave and other politicians. Check it out. I agree with a lot of what FP has to say except when he spouts that junk about how Tiger Woods isn't the greatest athlete of all time and how I'm starting to get Golfer's Ass.
When I first saw your book photo I thought, "not bad, I've met Humble, and he looks pretty good in this photo." Then, you post your shot alongside that of a soap star, and now you just look a little dorky. Dude, you're not doing yourself any favours!
The funny thing about that? I agree with him.
Strange how we all have a sense of how we look. I'm not really sure of how I appear to others but when I put my shot up next to Soap Guy I could see that he did not look dorky.
You know what, given all I've been up to lately, dorky isn't bad.
Posted by Humble on October 26, 2006 @ 15:19|Permalink
Funny Comments From YOU!
This week has been a huge learning curve for me with this site. Thanks to my wife Randee and Web Genius Mike Boon, I'm becoming more agile in manipulating stuff on this page. See I just put that hyper-link thingy where Mike Boon's name is. I didn't know how to do that before. That's some cool Shite!
Anyway, this week I've also recieved some nice/funny/odd comments from some of you so here's a few highlights.
Former morning show producer and Markham Mayor Andy wilson writes...
This site may be the greatest website in the world history of websites. I'm giddy just thinking about it. It tickles me where it counts.
Love u and miss u.
PS - Why is your head and Dans head stretched to look the width of Stewie?
Another former morning show producer and Large-Skulled Dan Duran says...
Yes I really enjoyed my flight with Howard.......but this new wide screen effect you have going really doesn't capture the drama. While it looks ok on you maybe...it just makes me look wide.
And finally Val, not a former morning show producer who isn't freaked out by the Wide-Screen Picture Effect (which I learned how to do!) comments...
Humble!!! I thought I'd take a chance and do a google on your ass! I'm so glad you have a blog. Now I'm so up to date on you as well as Freddie P! Sorry to hear about your departure.. I was definitely a fan.
Looking forward to the Slime that Men Do. Had put in an entry for it and was contacted, so I hope to see my feeble life displayed for all to see!!!
All the best....
Weird. Having one's ass Googled! I thought it would hurt more.
Leave your comments in the comment section and if I highlight yours you could win an all expense paid coffee with me some afternoon as I usually start to get a little bored around 1:30-2.
Posted by Humble on September 28, 2006 @ 09:12|Permalink