Oh my goodness.
Want to know what MU is all about? Hot chicks bending over and guys stuffing cocktail weenies in Borat bathing suits.
No I'm not kidding.
Enjoy.
Hey peeps. You've probably noticed that Twitter has taken over my blogging life. I just find it easier to throw up a 140 character update then to go on and on about the minutiae of my ridiculous existence.
I am having a riot though writing nonsensical things little bits a a time and I would encourage you to follow me at www.twitter.com/humhow. Oh the fun we'll have.
Having said that.
I'll be spending this weekend taping the 2nd season of ManUP and if you'd like to be part of the audience e-mail and I'll set you up with the details.
Also this weekend it's Tiger and the U.S. Open and Fathers day.
Here is a little FD funny that I found on the Utoob.
Enjoy.
Posted by Humble on June 17, 2009 @ 16:46|Permalink
The Podcast of Memories couldn't have been better.
Except if we'd have taken a group picture.
Dang it all. Yes I said "dang!" We had all of H+F pals and former work-mates and we didn't' get that great group shot that says, " Hey we were all here with these two old guys who we use to work with..."
Other than that it was pretty cool as you'll hear in the next few weeks when the actual Podcast goes up.
I admit that I was curious as to how it would all go and how we'd fill the time but it was a breeze.
Freddy and I fell into the old rhythm as though we'd been doing it forever, which of course we had. It was funny and at times poignant(Scary Pete's song) and bitter sweet. It made us both realize that doing that silly old show was one of the great experiences of our lives and it all went by too quickly and maybe we didn't appreciate it when we were doing it every day.
There was so much that I could relate but It'll make more sense when you hear it.
In no particular order here are some random thoughts.
-Dan Duran is one funny bastard and I'd forgotten how funny the "Tote Bag" bit was.
-Fred and I can still make each other laugh.
-All the guys that showed up Andy, Pete, Shwarma, Bingo, Lil Spanky, Nicki, Nick and Tyler really made this thing work.
-Boon is an official member of the H+F family.
-Seeing our kids and families watching us do the show made me nostalgic for the H+F Christmas shows at the Horseshoe.
-My soccer Dad buddies showed up and I'm glad they got to sample the Old Show.
-One of my current Radio Partners (I have 19) Colleen Rusholme was there and all my soccer Dad buddies thought she was hot. They are right. She's also a good shit and I was thrilled to have her in the crowd witnessing the nonsense.
-One of my best mates Lou Schizas showed support as always and told a great tale.
-My boss and friends from ACME pictures hung out and Ric R even videoed it for a companion to the Podcast. My freind Kelly E can really really drink.
All in all I loved it and was sad when it ended. FP can still bring it and it just seems a shame that we may never be able to assemble that feeling again.
No I don't know why we're not on the Radio somewhere, but sometime in the next few weeks the H+F Podcast of Memories will be availble for you to listen to and reminisce with.
I don't think you'll be disappointed.
Here's a bit of the fun with me and FP and Lil Spanky.
Mike Boon will be publishing a little Q+A on his wildly popular blog/twitter/whatever 'feast of the senses' on Monday. He sent me an intrusive list of questions that I tried to answer honestly and somewhat wittily (with mixed results of both clarity and comedy) and you can read all about it when it goes live on Boons Blog.
In the meantime his inquisition got me thinking about a few H+F nuggets and if time permits this week I'll expand on a memory or two that may be of some slight interest to friends/fans of the old show.
Fred touched me with his Dink. No I'm not kidding.
Not sure if this will make it onto the Podcast or if Fred related this story to Mike(as he was asked a similar list of soft-ball ???'s) but it was in the early days of our show and the legend goes like this:
Fred and I knew we were on to something in the first few years on the air because we cracked each other up so much. And not just Radio funny like you hear on a lot of the shows but some really funny/comedic moments and at times some hysterical stuff that got both of us laughing so hard we couldn't speak.
This was exciting stuff. Very often we would do things off the air just to get a reaction out of the other guy and then we'd push it further and then we'd mock each other on the air about the stupid thing we did off the air. With me so far? BTW. Our bosses hated this. They thought our show was too "inside" and that we weren't including the listener. Which was of course bullshit because H+F people listened for that very reason, they felt like they were in on the joke and that's what made it special. Our bosses never understood this because they weren't in on the joke, ironically enough. It's what made Howard Stern so successful. He created a world unto himself with a cast of characters and unique characteristics and then spent an inordinate amount of time talking about it and themselves.
Anyway back to Fred's Wang.
One day early on we were having a particularly giddy show where lots of funny/goofy/infantile stuff was going in the studio and on the air and Fred, in a fit of childishness, took out his dinky and a)shook it at me b)touched me on the arm with it.
Why you ask?
Who can really say.
To get my reaction.
To make me laugh.
To see if I would vomit.
All of the above.
For the record my reaction was a mixed bag. I laughed till I puked.
The point being that we were both so into this new show and it's new, often bizarre sense of humor, that on this particular day Fred felt the need to shake his thing at me and slap it against my arm.
I wonder if Roger ever did that to Marylin?
Only 19 more sleeps!
Yes hhdotcom peeps the big show is now being planned and sorted and who knows, by May 2nd we may even have a clue as to what we're going to do.
But I doubt it.
The banner at the top say it all...the Podcast of Memories is a go and we'd love to have you drop by for a beer and witness the show in person. Of course the place only holds 90 people so get there early to avoid disappointment. (Of course once you're there we can't guarantee you won't be disappointed as well but that's the nature of the H+F brand!)
Freddy wrote a nice thing yesterday that explains what we're up to so have a look.
I'd just like to let you know that since that was penned I've spoken to Nick Kypreos a long-time Humble and Fred regular, and he's agreed to appear for old times sake. Wow, a real live celebrity guest!
We'll have all sorts of friend and nonsense and it'd be great to have you join us.
I know I know but I've been busy.
No I don't have someone else. No, seriously.
Okay, okay maybe once in a while I blog over at EZRock.com but that's just for work, it doesn't mean anything.
Your the blog I love!
Hi again Hhdotcom. I've missed you and if any of you still come over here once in a while, I'd like to say "Hello!"
Here are some thoughts in no particular order.
Slum Dog Millionaire. Loved it and wasn't surprised it did well.
The Wrestler. Loved it and wasn't surprised it didn't do much. Mickey Rourke is amazing in it and still bat-shit crazy off camera.
This may sound weak -sauce but I was happy Maple Leaf fans didn't' boo Captain Mats, even though they would have been justified.
Tiger came back last week which was cool for me. Then he begins birdie-eagle after an 8 month lay-off and then craps the bed for the most part after that. Still it's great he's back and that the golf season has begun again.
I have gone Snowboarding over 10 times this Winter and it's made a real difference in my hate-on for cold weather. It' also F-ed up my shoulder, re-broke my thumb and bruised my right knee. Dang it all but it sucks to be old sometimes!
Life at home is all Girls and Momma and high-school drama and laughs and tears and the whole 9 yards. (And that's just me...) Also we've been renovating our basement which has now stretched into month 7 but hey we're saving money by having a great guy name Rick S do the work. (I'd recommend him in a second but of course you can't hire him now because I've adopted him.)
Life at the Radio Station/TV show/Video Production company is great but busy. This is the reason I don't blog much here anymore. Too many other non-blog related items to tick off in a day. No excuse I know but that's my reality.
Finally Fred and are cooking up something cool for H+F fans and we'll have the announcement here and at Freddiep.com in the next couple of weeks.
Hopefully you'll hear from me before that!
Okay in no particular order.
Merry Xmas. I mean that. I hope you got what you wanted from Santa and that you had a chance to relax with family and friends.
I did.
I got exactly what I wanted. Socks. I'm serious. I love cushy, comfortable socks and this year I got a crap load of them.
I also got some nice booze. I very much enjoyed this orange-fused Vodka that my pal Colleen Rusholme got me . It's gone now but it was satisfying and delicious.
The various Vaginas that I manage all seemed to enjoy the presents I gave them and that made me feel very festive indeed.
This year, as always I made the SantaMass bird and it was my yummiest to date. (Or so said the aforementioned VJ's!)
On Boxing Day we all went up North to Collingwood for 2 days of boarding and 2 days of sitting round waiting for the Rain storm to end not to be confused with the Gale-force winds that pretty much shut down most of the hills.
One day we all went to see the movie "Marley and Me" and bawled our frickin eyes out.
I kid you not. Me, my buddy Dave, his son and my girls and my wife, all of us just crying like babies. I promise you if you like dogs or sentimental dog-movies then bring lots of snot-rags.
Another day Randee and I went to see the Curious Case of Benjamin Button and a curious thing happened. Just as we had settled in to this amazing little Brad Pitt/Kate Blanchett flick, the power went out. Not just in the theatre but in all of Collingwood. Shit on a stick.
We had to "evacuate" (that's what the usher said...dude relax it's just a power failure.)
and we saw the other 2 hours that was left a couple night later. Excellent film and I say go see this when you want to watch something sweet and you've got 167 mintues to kill. (Long but doesn't feel like it.)
Finally tonight is our annual New Years Eve thing at our house. We've been doing this for nearly 15 years and it's a nice way to celebrate the beginning of another 365 days. We started this when our girls were babies and now the older one is off to a friends and the little one is far too grown up for me. We have a bunch of peeps for dinner and then we watch the tube at midnight, do the champagne thing and then by 1:30 or so it's all over.
So to all you nice people that drop by from time to time still...I would like to wish you all the very best and a healthy happy 2009!
Douche-Nozzle!
We'll excuse me.
You see it snowed a bunch round here the last few days, case you hadn't noticed and I foolishly thought that I might be able to purchase a snow-blower.
After Friday's Snow-mageddon, I officially had enough of shoveling snow. As did my neighbor Bob. (I have three neighbor Bob's!)
Anyway, Bob and I both got fed up and decided to go halfsies on a machine. I was authorized by our newly formed company, complete with share-holders agreement(Thkis Bob a lawyer) and off I went the next day to Can Tire, Home Depot and Wal-Mart.
"I would like to purchase a snow-blowing machine, please," I said.
"Are you out of your mind?" Was the universal response. "We have no more left!"
Imagine expecting them to actually have them in stock after the biggest snow-fall this year.
I know I should have bought one sooner but don't you think they would have enough to sell in the two purchasing cycles?
Those are: 1) Before it snows and the smart people who think these things through and buy their F**king machines in October.
2) And the rest of us who finally say enough is enough I've shoveled my last driveway and I'm going to buy a snow-blower.
Apparently there are no provisions for guys like me who are motivated by a recent dumping of snow and run out to buy the thing in response.
Seriously they could have sold a thousand machines yesterday. Didn't anyone think about that...and forget about having to offer discounts I would have gladly paid full-price.
The funny thing is by the time they have any for sale again my snow-anger may have subsided and I may not want one.
For now I have to go shovel my driveway again and think about the machine I could have bought. Maybe I'll make snow-blower noises and pretend.
On another subject we did our EZ Morning Gift of XMas on Friday and it was amazing. Strange to be doing it without Fred after all these years and apparently he felt the same. Have a look here.
people.
Where has the time gone?
I am very sorry we've lost touch with one another but I thought if there was anyone left that still drops in here, I'd say hello.
Hello.
Have you been following the Coalition of the Dammed? Strange and fascinating at the same time. Worrisome too because as we've been treated to Canadian political theatre at it's very best, the economy has been continuing it's tank-a-thon.
Just today Bob Rae stepped aside to let Michael Ignatieff take over as Liberal leader and maybe cooler heads will prevail. Yes I'm on the Anti side of this mess but it doesn't mean I'm pro Harper. He may have miscalculated (badly) but that doesn't mean I'm in favor of the other 3 parties forming their own little combo and taking over the government.
The uncertainty isn't helping my RRSP or yours and of course there's that sniggly little detail about them not being elected.
Yah that's where I get off the short bus. We had an election, the PC's won, the douche-nozzle's gave them about 2 weeks, then decided a) my vote didn't count and b) they knew better and c) my vote didn't count.
We have a lot to be proud of though. We could be seeing a coup in the making and other than a few "rallies" no blood has been shed and the biggest reaction is "outrage!" Very Canadian.
I've been a busy bastard the last 4 months but it looks like I'll be able to slow down a bit prior to and including Chanukah-Mass. I am in pre-production for a new cooking show I'm hosting(long story) and I'm still working in the video world at ACME and uh oh yeah, I'm getting up everyday at 3:30 and making ha ha on the Radio. Yet I do feel like things are slowing down or maybe I'm just getting used to the pace.
I'd love to hear how you all are doing. I keep in touch with a few Hhdotcom peeps, I read the Boon Blog every day and I have had a nice chat or two with Freddie P lately. I worked with his son Danny on 4 episodes of ManUp. Not only has he turned out to be a great kid, but he is a fine camera man and all around good dude to have on the set.
I'll try and update things a little more regularly.
Happy Pre-Xmas and all that festive hoo ha.
I wish I would have put this up yesterday. I did remember and I hope you did too.
Strange how sometimes it takes the perspective of outsiders to make us feel so proud about who we are and just how there is a "Canadian" way to do things.
Good luck trying to watch this without a tear.
(Thanks to Colleen Rusholme for the heads up on this.)
(I could only find this on NBC's site hence the non Youtube look.)
Like a lot of things in my life lately Mike Boon is there to chronicle them.
He was part of the nonsense this past weekend when we taped our first 4 episodes of ManUp Canada. It was a riot, just pure and simple guy immaturity and fun. Read about some of Mike's highlights here.
And if that won't convince you maybe this shot will.
This is me, our RHG(Random Hot Girl) and my buddy Dave. Like a lot of my friends he's asked to come back and watch another show this coming weekend. If you'd like to be part of the show I can give you all the details if you e-mail me....Hhoward@EZRock.com.
This is the very strange show I've been working on. Strange and funny.
We shot the first 2 episodes today and it went very well. I've been prepping with a young, talented crew on this thing for the past month or so and this was our first chance to get it up in front of a camera and for our first day it couldn't have gone better.
It features guys doing bizarre challenges...paint ball duels, lard sculptures, obstacle courses, a Random Hot Girl in a bikini and me asking silly questions. How can this miss?
I'd love for you to come to a taping. If you want to be part of the audience e-mail me-Hhoward@EZRock.com and I'll get you in.
Here is the official press release.
Are You Humble Enough to Man Up on National TV?
We live in volatile times. It is important that we find humour and solace
in the human condition. And there is no better way to do that than to watch
grown men act like idiots.
Who doesn't love watching that?
RedFish Entertainment and Fingerprint Communications are proud to present an
idea that's time has come. ManUp Canada is now in production and will be on
MenTV in January 2009.
Host Humble Howard Glassman says that ManUp Canada will answer the age old
question; "Can a man sculpt a block of lard with a hacksaw? And more
importantly, why would he want to?"
As a radio, television and stage veteran, Humble Howard has seen it all and
adds that ManUp Canada is "the show that will have people running to their
local big box store to buy super high definition TV's just so they can watch
men smack each other with pool noodles while jousting in shopping carts."
RedFish founding partner, executive producer and director of ManUp Canada,
Mike Wixson says; "We're going to test guys' mental and physical limitations
right in front of a national television audience. This is going to be
sweet!"
ManUp Canada is more than a game show. It is a test of endurance, brain
cells and the ability to step up to the challenge. Pitting three
contestants against each other, this half-hour show will push men's limits.
Humble Howard adds "ManUp Canada is more than a game show; it's an
examination of man's ability to make a total idiot of himself for prizes."
Kneale Mann, RedFish partner and executive producer says "This gives us the
chance to fully integrate our clients into the creative process and be a
part of the show. Plus the plunger wall is gonna be hilarious!"
Producer Tim Juvet reminds us that these stunts should not be tried at home.
Rather, he says; "Call us and perhaps become a contestant on the show!"
Juvet, a drama student and director of more serious projects jumped at the
chance to produce ManUp Canada because "I get to be the guy who starts the
pier pressure and taunting". The only other information he is sharing at
this point is that contestants will need to sign a waiver. Enough said.
The final word goes to host Humble Howard; "ManUp Canada is the show this
country's been waiting for because watching men try to change a tire while
being pelted with paint balls is the type of thing that will finally turn
this economy around."
Production begins now. Look for ManUp Canada on MenTV in January 2009.
Posted by Humble on October 18, 2008 @ 20:50|Permalink
Live Music and entertianment
This has been quite a summer for me. I mean besides getting back into Radio and working at ACME and starting a new TV show. Those are all great but I'm talking about the fact that I have seen more live entertainment since July than I had in the last couple of years.
I know part of it is being back on the air and being invited to stuff but I paid for some shows myself before my new gig started.
Starting in early July I saw Steely Dan at Casino Rama. Great show and a big thrill for me and fellow Dan-fans, Stinky, Dan and Freddie P.
Also in that month we took our kids to the Stratford Festival to see The Music Man. Great old-school play where people just break into song for no reason. Kids loved it and I was happy to expose them to it. I nodded off a bit but those theatre seats are so cozy.
Then I was invited to the opening of Jersey Boys, very cool, great singing and one of the best of these musical play types of things that I've seen. People break into song but actually have a reason.
Once the little Radio Show started I got to host the red carpet at Canada's Walk of Fame ceremonies. Extremely cool. Got to meet and shake hands with James Cameron, Michael J.Fox, Steve Nash, Brian Adams and KD Lang. That night I also got to see Adams and KD perform live and they were awesome.
A couple of weeks ago Randee and me got to see my other favorite Randy, perform at Convocation Hall. Randy Newman isn't everyone's thing but some of you may know that I've been a fan for many years and it was very cool for me to see him perform live for the first time. I bought these tickets but I did get to go backstage and meet him. Strange dude but couldn't have been nicer.
Finally last night i was at Let it Be a tribute to the music of Lennon and McCartney featuring Rik Emmitt of Triumph, Fergus Hambleton from the Satellites, Russell DeCarte from Prairie Oyster, Andrew Craig and Damhnait Doyle. Absolutely amazing. I love this music and these folks and this 9 piece band just blew me away. Of course I'm sort of stalking Damhnait now after having her on the show this week. She is Kim Stockwood's besty and former mate from Shaye but I'm pretty sure the 2 of us have something going. Of course Damhnait may not know it yet. She is not only one of the most talented artists but one of the nicest as well....and a bit of a Vagenius(Patent Pending)
So there you have it. It's been fun reconnecting with live entertainment again. I'm always amazed and fascinated by people who are good at anything whether it's watching Tiger play golf or musicians and actors perform.
It's one of the reason I don't watch our local hockey team.
Posted by Humble on October 5, 2008 @ 08:26|Permalink
Hi, I'm Howard, how are you?
I know it's been a little dry around here lately and I apologize. I don't know what to tell you.
I feel like I've lost touch with you Hhdotcomers and it bugs me.
Hi. How ya been?
Happy Rosh Hashana!
It's the Jewish New Year and I'm pretty excited for the year 5769. ( I think that's what it is...I'm a bad Jew)
My wife has made TWBCS. The Worlds Best Chicken Soup. We're also having chicken, this stuff called Lockshencoogle (noodles and raisins) and other Hebrew delectables.
I enjoy this holiday because in our house it's about family as well as religion.
Oh yeah, today I also held a penguin!
No I'm not crapping ya.
On the Big Broadcast we had some people from Sea World in Orlando on and they brought a whole bunch of creatures including a baby crocodile and 2 Penguins. Penguins are cool.
They're feathers are very soft and hair-like and I was struck by the fact that I'm nearly 50 years old and today was my first Penguin encounter.
The new gig is full of days like this. Tomorrow we're interviewing Rick Mercer. I wonder what his feathers are like?
Hey the US team didn't suck too much at the Ryder Cup and actually won for a change. In case you have no idea what I'm talking about(and trust me I'm used to that!) that last sentence referred to a big Bi-Annual golf event between a bunch of golf dudes from the USA and continental Europe. This is the first time the Americans have won this thing since 99, although I quite enjoy watching them having their butts kicked.
It's been a few weeks since hurricane Ike hit Galveston and it may not be top of mind but this picture shows just how devastated the area was. This homeowner told his contractor to build him a house that could withstand a category 5 hurricane and I guess it turned out okay. At least for them.
And finally apparently William Shatner is a tad upset that JJ Abrams, the creator of Lost and new Star Trek director, left him out of the picture...so to speak. Here's William talking bout it from his new Youtube channel called The Shatner Project. Yes that's what it's really called. Yikes.
I had a "Lou" moment yesterday. Ron Lancaster died and it made me feel sorta sad all day.
A "Lou" moment, is the sudden, unexpected bit of melancholy that hits me when something reminds me of my Dad. This definitely qualified.
Ron Lancaster was the Tom Brady of the Roughriders. My Dad loved the Riders and when I was a kid Lancaster handing off to Reed was a staple of the team.
All day I thought of my Dad and what would he have thought of Ron's passing. Of course I felt bad for Lancaster family and what #23 meant to so many football fans but to be honest I mostly thought of Lou. Weird huh?
There are lot's of times in a day or week when I'll wish that I could call my pop and share something with him but not all of those occasions leave me blue.
Long ago people told me that every once in a while I'd experience the sadness of my Fathers death and yesterday's Lou moment proved them right.
Posted by Humble on September 19, 2008 @ 17:42|Permalink
The Men Commandments...revisited
I' know this thing has been around for a bit but it's dang funny and you may want to check it out again.
I was reminded of the "The Things a man should and should never do" when I read about a Radio dude in the States who is actually turning these into a book. (Wow I hate when Radio guys do books, don't you?)
Here are a few of the Men Commandments. -Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his friends.
-Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
-If you've known a Man for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you actually marry her.
-Moaning about the brand of free beer in a friend's fridge is forbidden. Complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
-No Man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another Man. In fact, even remembering your friend's birthday is strictly optional.
Here's the rest here. Enjoy.
Posted by Humble on September 10, 2008 @ 19:24|Permalink
Blogging here and there and...
It might get a bit confusing but I hope it all works out.
I will be blogging it up at EZRock.com and I invite all you fine Hhdotcom peeps to check that out when you get a chance.
Today I met Suzanne Somers and her husband Alan Hamel, former Canadian talk show dude and it was cool.
She's a lot smarter than you'd think and very nice.
Have a look at the weird pic of me with Alan and check out the video of Suzanne on the show.
Here's the entry.
Yes all these entries are going to refer back and forth for a while until I can come up with a rhythm for it all.
The Bloggage has been light lately and I'm sorry. Busy, the Boon was working on some site-repair and it's been a few days since I checked in.
So here I am.
My pal Toni, aka Soccer Mom, aka MeOnlydifferent, has given me an award. She's nice that way and I invite you to view this honor at her site. I did.
Thanks Soccer Mommy.
The thing about doing the Radio Show again every day is a bunch of leftover stuff that I prepped for the show but may or may not have gotten to.
So let's begin with: Many predict top-12 finish in London's 2012 Olympic Games. -75% of respondents are satisfied with the performance of the Canadian team in Beijing
-Albertans are most dissatisfied (19%) with the team's results
-50% say 18 medals won show Canadian sport is improving
-42% think Canada will be able to finish in top-12 in the London 2012 Olympic Games
We love these types of things in morning Radio.
Also today we did a thing we call "Three Takes" where we give our take on any particular subject...this morning it was all about Back to School. Can you imagine.
My take was:
"About a minute ago my girls were born, we cried and wondered,"How the hell we were going to figure this all out?" Well like most parents, we muddled through, they grew up nicely and then went school. Then they grew some more, one of them even grew some boobies and now that one starts grade 9. Here's the way I look at things. If she's in grade 9 that means I must be a lot older than I was when she was born and that means one day she'll be finished school and that means soon I'll be dead!"
And finally have a crack at this Morning Show Mind Teaser.
THE MORNING SHOW DOES MATH!!
Since school is starting up, we brought up this classic math brain teaser.
Three men go into a motel. The man behind the desk said the room is $30, so each man paid $10 and went to the room. A while later the man behind the desk realized the room was only $25, so he sent the bellboy to the three guys' room with $5.
On the way, the bellboy couldn't figure out how to split $5 evenly between three men, so he gave each man a $1 bill and kept the other $2 for himself.
This meant that the three men each paid $9 for the room, which is a total of $27. Add the $2 that the bellboy kept = $29.
Where is the other dollar?
The answer is on the internet...just google Motel Math Problem. The answer will surprise you.
Just winding down from the week and I thought I'd hit a site I have in my favorites called Boing Boing (" A directory of wonderful things!") It's one of those great internet time-wasters that I land on every now and then. Check it out and it may make it into one of your bookmarks.
On Boing Boing I found this cool interactive map called Wanderlust, tracing the most famous journeys from Lindbergh to Kerouac.
Pretty interesting and educational stuff and of course a way to while a way a few spare minutes.
Posted by Humble on August 24, 2008 @ 10:02|Permalink
Day one is over and now...
Day two.
The reality sets in and it's on to the next 750 or shows. A guy named Doc Harris in Vancouver once told that mornings are a marathon not a sprint and he was absolutely right. You have to show up and do solid stuff every day, day in day out and then after about 3 years or so (750 shows) you start to become the listener's habit.
I'm not saying that we won't make an impact before that-at least I hope we do. It's just that I know that a lot of the magic of mornings is being there for someone every day.
Day two of that "every day" starts Tuesday.
Day one recap.
Dang it all I was nervous. Excited as hell but pretty freaked out and then I turned on the Mic and I was fine.
So were the women. Colleen Rusholme is just a great broadcaster. Quick, smart and way underrated. Kim Stockwood is amazing. Such a neat, intelligent, funny, grounded chick and both are way too good looking to be in Radio.
I can't tell you how many of my buddies want to come down and "check out" the show.
Sure there were some problems but over all it was a great first effort and by the time you read this Day two will be well underway.
Hey ya wanna see a scary picture of me on FreddiP's site. Check this ridonkulous vision out!
I'll be back on the Radio.
Right now it's Sunday night. I've spent the day watching my youngest play soccer, keeping track of the propane fire, checking out the Olympics, watching the final round of the PGA, doing hours of show prep and getting more and more nervous.
Yes I've had butterflies all day and it's weird.
I've been a Radio announcer since July of 1977 and I can't remember the last time I was nervous before I went to work. Sure this is different because as many of you know I haven't "Radio Announced" for some 25 months.
The last time I was on the Air was the end of June, 2006. I listened to a little bit of that show the other night and it was a surreal. I had known for some time that I was in danger of losing my job and on my last break, I said,"Steve Anthony will be here Monday and we'll be back on the 17th after our 2 week break." Then I paused and both Bingo Bob and I said in unison,"...but you NEVER KNOW!"
Well that holiday lasted just a bit longer than I planned. Now I'm ready to get back to the one thing I love doing more than anything else. Don't get me wrong, I have dug all the amazing opportunities and jobs I've been part of these past 25 months, but I guess there's a reason I'm still doing this after 31 years. I really missed it and I'm glad to get the chance to be part of Broadcasting again.
The new program is called The EZ Morning Show with Humble, Kim and Colleen.
I would love for you to give it a chance. It's going to be a whole new experience for me and I'm very lucky to get to work with these 2 amazing(and extremely attractive) women. I'll be writing about them and the new show in the coming weeks but in the meantime if you'd like to check out some of the EZ Rock music go to TheBoon's site.
And for a little interview I did with my pal Shane, go here.
Also, and I'll touch on this some more later thanks very much to all the Radio and non-Radio people that e-mailed me with congratulations. It was very touching and nice to hear from some of my pals and old Radio peeps from days gone by.
Well I'm going to stop now because it's nearly bed-time...or at least trying to go to bed-time.
I know one thing I haven't forgotten and that's just how early 3:15 am is.
Hello and welcome to my first entry using a Mac. My brother Stevie G got one a couple of years ago and I've been jealous ever since.
Well now I have one too.
I've had the machine now for 4 days and I love it. It's sleek and cool and easy to use. Of course I have only used it sparingly but from what I've seen so far I'm hooked. My kids are pretty Mac-friendly and have been all over this thing. They have made movies, songs, distorted pictures and have had several mini-fights about who gets daddy's laptop next.
My favorite thing they've played with so far is Garage Band.
Both of my little genius's have created decent tracks from a menu of loops and I must say they're not bad. Best of all it kept them quiet at our friends cottage and during that dreadful 3.5 hour drive home.
I used a Mac back in the 80's when I lived in LA. My roommates worked a production company and they brought home one of the original Macintosh's. Big, boxy thing but pretty cool even back then. That was the last time I touched a Mac and I've spent the last 20 plus years plugging away on a PC.
I'm not ready to jump on the Mac bandwagon hardcore just yet, but I will say so far the kool-aid tastes pretty good.
Oh well that was pretty excruciating to watch. But predictable.
First hole, nice drive, just slightly wonky second, blast from the bunker into a hurricane and then the putt. The putt that just grazes the edge. Could have easily have dropped and given some momentum, but no. The Golf Gods hate Greg Norman so it stayed out. And somehow you knew that was it.
Bogeys on hole 1, 2 and 3 and then it was off to the races.
I still dug it though. I actually yelled out loud at the TV several time during the morning/mid-afternoon.
"Great, yeah just lip out again Greg!"
"Sure, why wouldn't you hit driver into the crap. You go big boy!"
"No kidding you made bogey, that's what you do..."
And other such drivel. At one point Randee asked me if the guy I was talking to would like something to eat.
At any rate this was another Greg Normand missed opportunity. I don't care that he's 53, newly married, doesn't play much golf or that Paddy Harrington played out of his freaking skull. This was Greg's last and best chance. Once again he ripped out the guts of anyone who was pulling for him.
"Hey Greg, why don't you just rip out more of my guts!" I yelled.
Too bad. Now he just has to go hang out on one of his 2 yachts or 2 jets with his famous still sort of hot tennis-legend wife and see if he can't spend some of his nearly 500 million net worth, all the while being ruggedly handsome and in great shape.
Maybe that's the reason the Golf Gods hate Greg Norman.
Easily.
This summer is the 5th year anniversary of us putting in our pool and it is by far my best purchase ever.
We don't have a cottage and despite renting one for a week each year our backyard is where we spend most of our summer days.
When we dug the hole my kids were 5 and 8 and for the first couple of summers, all day ever day, all we did was swim together.
While my wife watched of course. The set of circumstances that will get her to actually enter the water, are so complex and diverse that they really only occur a couple of times a year. She does love to lounge though.
The girls and I love to swim. And throw a football. Or whack each other with pool-noodles. Or try and find things on the bottom. Or pretend to throw their mother in.
Even now that they are 5 years older we still spend a lot of time in the pool...together.
That's why it's been such a great investment. For many summers, I have spent an inordinate amount of time within a few swim-strokes away from my kids.
I wouldn't have missed this for anything.
I feel bad for Steven Page.
I have always liked him and he has never been anything but a decent, stand-up guy where I am concerned.
Years ago we(CFNY and Fred and I) did him and BNL a little solid and he and the lads never forgot us.
Anytime, no matter how big they'd gotten, they always answered our call and for many years- passed the point of payback, they played our annual Christmas party.
Now Steven P is in a spot of trouble.
Who knows the real story but I feel terrible that he'll be dragged through the mud no matter what this turns out to be.
I heard he left his wife about a year ago and he's been running at it pretty hard for a while.
Doesn't matter to me, all I know is he's a good guy who will hopefully get some help and get his business straightened out.
One of my fondest Steven Page memories is of playing the song Brian Wilson on the guitar while he sang it at one of our H+F Xmas shows while we were at MOJO. Ed and the rest of the guys couldn't make it that year, but Fred and I promised to join the NDP if Steve would play our show.
We did(much to our chagrin...I think Freddie is still scarred!) and he came through.
I remember talking to him on the phone about the chords and thinking, "Wow, the guy who wrote one of my favorite songs is actually teaching me how to play it!"
Needless to say, playing it with him live was a huge buzz for me.
Thats why I'll give him the benefit of the doubt.
He's a good, solid, decent guy who's in some trouble and for that I am sorry.
I wish him nothing but well.
Dokee.
I read this morning that Sean Cullen has made it to the semi-finals of Last Comic Standing season 6.
I had no idea that a) the show was still on and 2) that Sean was on it, but good on him.
Very talented cat who has done it all including a stint in The Producers. (Which he might like to forget but hey, he did it.)
I have fond memories of him in Corky and the Juice PIgs when they'd stop by the Humble and Fred show and sing.....
Last night I was at a going away party for a friend who'd been fired but never got to say goodbye. I know how she feels.
Karen Steele was my boss at the Mix for my last couple of years and a few months ago she got canned.
When that happens in Radio and you're on the air...you never get to come back and say goodbye to the listeners.
When you are a PD and you get the gate, you don't get the "Hey it was great to work with you party" no matter how long you were on staff. Last night Karen got that party.
For me it was great to see her and her husband Blair Bartrem, who is the PD of Q107 and also my former boss. He's also the only guy that's flown with me and heard me get bitch-slapped by Air Traffic Control. (Long story but it involved almost flying into a parachuter. Apparently frowned upon.)
I also got to see Mix Music Director Wayne Webster, the lovely Maura Grierson, Jim Richards from CFRB (who is just real funny), my pal Andy Wilson(who is also very funny), EZ Rock afternoon guy KJ( who is a freaky good Jock) and so many more. Including the guy that fired me Gary S.
He and I have a good relationship despite the fact that he's responsible for me not being on the Radio for the past 24 months. Which as some of you have gleaned has been a pretty great time in my life. I'm not saying that it wouldn't have been good to be a broadcaster for the past couple of years but by stepping away from it I've had so many other amazing opportunities and experiences.
I will say this though, hanging with those Radio people last night I realized what I missed about doing the gig. Just like any job, it's the people.
It was nice to get a chance to say hello and goodbye for me too.
My buddy Dave White sent me this from one of my favorite writers Dave Barry. I don't care if you think Dave is unhip or old school(Barry not White-although White is pretty hip.) I have always liked Dave Barry cause his writing makes me laugh out loud. Which is rare when it comes to something I've read. Anyway this is dang funny and good information for those us who will one day be over 50 years old. For me that is 569 days away but who's counting. Me that's who.
This colonoscopy story was first printed in the Miami Herald back in February but through the magic of Web 2.0 I bring it to you today.
Enjoy.
Dave Barry: A journey into my colon -- and yours OK. You turned 50. You know you're supposed to get a colonoscopy. But you haven't. Here are your reasons:
1. You've been busy.
2. You don't have a history of cancer in your family.
3. You haven't noticed any problems.
4. You don't want a doctor to stick a tube 17,000 feet up your butt.
Yes I am virtually powerless when it comes to my girls. They are my favorite things in the world by far and when I'm not with them I practice saying "No!"
"No honey, you can't have a sleepover. Oh well maybe you can."
"No sweetheart, we're not going to get a dog. On second thought, sure."
"No baby, daddy can't give you a ride to the mall. Aw, why not, come hop in the car."
Recently my pal Dean from Hamilton sent me an article that says that all this Daddy/Daughter love is actually good for the girls. I know it's good for me. Attentive, loving fathers mean confident daughters She went on to give her theory that women in healthy relationships -- the kind built on trust and love and mutual commitment, as opposed to the kind built on drama and need and jealousy and greed -- are often those who had very attentive, loving dads. Dads who went to the soccer games and the piano recitals. Dads who were always watching, constantly validating. Dads who said: "You're smart. You're pretty. You're amazing. Your heart is big."
Posted by Humble on July 1, 2008 @ 11:56|Permalink
Happy Canada Day to all and to all...
...a Good Day Eh!
Is this not one of the strangest long/not long weekends ever. Very Canadian though. Some of us got the Monday off so we had a 3 day weekend, some worked yesterday and are off today and some of us took all four days off and had long long weekend. Yes something for everyone in that quirky Canuck way.
Today is the stat though and I'm going in to work. I'm posting a couple of videos for a Microsoft conference and in Seattle neither of these days is a holiday.
At least I'll get a break on the traffic.
So Happy Canada Day and heres hoping that it doesn't rain like it did almost every freakin day in June.
And here's hoping we figure out the Canada day stat before next year when it falls on a Wednesday!
Posted by Humble on July 1, 2008 @ 08:10|Permalink
Just an Hhdotcom Update.
I'm sure most of you have noticed production around here has dropped considerably. I'm sorry, it's just that the real world has conspired to interrupt my drivel production.
The drivel just don't flow like it once did.
I thought I'd just give you a quick update as to what is keeping me busy these days.
In the last week I've...
Spent 14 hours over three days recording an audio book. Kinda cool.
Worked on, met with, wrote and performed for a companies AGM. Very cool.
Worked at my Producing/Directing job and prepped for a shoot.
Spent endless hours driving back and forth.
Spent many joyful hours watching my girls play soccer.
(Watched a little golf. Just a little.)
Put the finishing touches on 6 months of prepping and helping to organize the LKTYP golf tournament.
And to top it all off, my oldest has a soccer tourney this week in Bowmanville, the youngest has her drama recital thingy, I'm going to Seattle Thursday and back Friday (hanging at Microsoft headquarters....very freaking cool)...I'm hosting the Kids theatre golf on Monday, Tuesday I may be going to Austin Texas and back in the same day and Wednesday it's Charlie's grade 8 grad.
So I'm having a hard time squeezing in time for the Hhdotcom.
I promise this though, things are going to calm down this summer in some ways and I should have more time to jot down the odd inane thought. I know one thing, I'm going to have lots to write about.
This is my 14th Fathers' Day.
I have 2 girls with boys names and they are both Daddy's girls.
I know this will sound sucky but I always tell them that because they are so sweet and kind and beautiful, everyday is Fathers Day. (Awwww.)
This is also my 2nd Father-less Fathers Day and I must admit the sadness of it has subsided.
When I first lost my Dad it was a sharp, constant pain that I wasn't sure was ever going to go away but now, not quite 2 years later, it's faded.
Every once in a while I get a bit of pain that comes out of nowhere and catches me by surprise but for the most part I'm okay with it.
I connect with my Dad through golf. So many of my memories of him have to do with learning, watching and talking golf that I can't even pick up a club without thinking about some tip my Father gave me over the years.
Watching Tiger is part of that. My Dad was a big Tiger fan and I know he would have loved seeing him play this weekend.
So today, I'll sit and watch the Open, the girls will leave me in peace (my Fathers day gift!) and I'll think of my Father and all the Golf we used to share.
Happy Fathers Day.
I've never seen anything like it.
I've been watching Tiger Woods play since the 1995 US Amateur, seen some remarkable things but this was definitely one for the highlight reel.
He's hobbling on a bad knee that even he admits is getting worse every day, he hasn't played in 2 months and he's leading the US Open. Are you kidding me?
That's what they were saying last night when he sank a 60 foot putt for eagle, not to be confused with the goofy chip-in for birdie and then another eagle on the last hole.
He has never lost with the lead in a major but I'll tell you something, I don't care if he wins anymore.
I don't.
He has already provided me with enough thrills and excitement and if he coughs it up or can't close today I won't care.
He is without a doubt a the best player to come along in forever and I will be watching him until he can't play anymore.
He not only has more heart and more stones than any other golfer but he's among the most phenomenal athletes of our time. Don't believe me, ask Michael Jordan or Roger Federer.
If you watched the prime time coverage you have to agree.
He starts by making a double and a bogey in the first 4 holes and instead of quiting he fights back.
Then he starts to put pressure on his knee and almost collapses in pain but finishes 4 under the last 6 holes.
Finally with the whole golf-world waiting he drains 2 ridiculous putts and once again meets and exceeds the already high expectations.
Anyone but Tiger would have thrown in the towel but today he has a chance to win major number 14.
I saw the new Indiana Jones movie this weekend when I needed a break from swimming and puttering and drinking and more swimming.
The Crystal Skull deal was more than okay it was in a word, satisfying. I liked it just fine thank you because it had all the elements that I was expecting and it delivered all the Indian Jones moments I knew were coming.
Thanks George Lucas and Stevie Ray Speilberg for not letting me down. Now I wasn't blown away by any means but if you loved Jones 1-3 you'll like this one too.
Last night I watched The Natural for about the umpteenth time (No pun intended) and I still dug it. For a movie that was produced in 1984 it holds up nicely and is still in my top 15 sports movies of all time. It was directed by Barry Levinson and features a young, somewhat hot Glenn Close, a really hot and young Barbara Hershey(80's Vagenius!) and a cast of heavies including Robert Redford before he got his weird chicken neck, Wilfred Brimly, Richard Farnsworth, Joe Don Baker and a young Michael Madsen before he was in Reservoir Dogs.
If you haven't seen it or haven't for a while check it out.
Strange that Raiders of the lost Ark was released in the early 80's just before The Natural and here we are nearly 30 years later and Indian Jones is still going strong. Although I couldn't imagine revisiting Roy Hobbs in any incarnation other than the time portrayed in The Natural.
Yes I get that one is cartoon and one is a fantasy but it just struck me how The Natural is still watchable and the only way I'm going to watch Raiders/Indiana Jones again is an updated 2008 version.
A supplement to Wired magazine. Geekipedia is a must-read for those of us who are on the outskirts of Geek/technology. By that I mean, we have a computer, we use the internet, but we aren't really that aware of all the people, places, trends and ideas that are floating around in the Geek-world. And there are plenty.
Most of the stuff we've all heard of but may not know many details about. I've heard of Nick Denton but didn't realize all the sites he was responsible for. He's runs a blogger empire even bigger than Toronto Mike!
I had however not heard of Dark Matter, DRM's or Darknet.(Check out all the D's.)
I found this entry on internet Radio particularly interesting. The Net lets even the smallest broadcaster stream audio to listeners anywhere on earth — hence, the flowering of garage DJs, global megastations, and next-gen music outlets like Pandora and Last.fm. But Internet radio also runs squarely into one of the most barnacle-encrusted bastions of old media: copyright law. The latest point of contention: Should webcasters — like their antenna-wielding cousins — be required to pay song-by-song, listener-by-listener royalties in every country they reach? In the US, fees are set by the federal Copyright Royalty Board. Earlier this year, the three-judge panel helpfully tripled the rates, setting off protests and legal battles. Internet radio may not use transmitters, but it still causes static.
Check out the rest of Geekipedia and then come on back. (This is called Crowdsourcing. Basically tapping the hive mentality of the net to work on a project or problem.)
Posted by Humble on June 6, 2008 @ 06:55|Permalink
The Humble One Is Resting
Hey gang, it's your friendly neighbourhood Toronto Mike here.
The Humble One is sunning at an undisclosed location (it's not Moose Jaw) and he will return to his semi-regular blogging schedule next week.
In the meantime, might I suggest you wander over to my Humble & Fred category page where you'll find dozens and dozens of very interesting Humble and Fred-related blog entries by yours truly. Read about the recording of the podcasts, the day I flew Humble's plane and other timeless and priceless gems.
Last week I shot and prepped 2 videos including the biggest studio shoot I've ever directed.
4 actors, big crew, big studio, lots of clients.
This week we're posting this thing and it's long hours and all hands on deck.
I'm sorry I haven't been able to stay in touch.
Have a look at the ACME site and check out our new blog and take a gander at the ACME demo.
Spencer has a pink water-proof cast.
Last week she broker her wrist and now, after the swelling went down, she's got a cast. Thankfully it's not going to be more than a couple of weeks before she can go back to soccer.
Which is both good news and bad.
Finally.
Very few TV things are a surprising as this.
I was as shocked as The Cook man. I was sure Archasquinta was going to win because he was going to suck in the granny vote. As in "Aw he's so cute and harmless and tiny..."
But David Cook was always going to be a star and is in fact what the show is all about.
Finding the American Idol.
Archie will have a fine career cause he's an amazing singer but I must tell you I was blown away.
Watch DC's eyes as they announce his name.
Funny, no one was more surprised than Cook himself.
are talking about?
What the hell?
How can that be?
I thought that Right Wing commentators weren't just blow-hards who think they have the moral high ground just because they are louder than everybody.
This Right-Wing ass walked into a buzz saw on hardball the other night and it was pathetic.
Pleasantly pathetic.
Really really busy.
I would love to drop you all a line but I've been the Running Man.
We've bid and won a big job at ACME recently and I'm in the middle of prepping that while shooting another.
Video that is.
In case some of you don't know I direct and produce Corporate videos. Some TV stuff too.
Anyway I know I've been lax in the Blog-Babble department but it's been ridonkulous around my life lately.
Yesterday I was in Brampton shooting at one location by 7:30 then off to Barrie for the rest of the day, followed by several hours of prep for this gig that we're shooting Friday.
Dang this having a real job is like work! And this is a job I love.
I'll post a few tid-bits if I can.
I've said this before I (nor most Radio nitwits) had no idea how lucky I was to intro records for a living.
My pal Mitch L sent me this bit of blubbering-inducing material.
It's a great story of sportsmanship and an insight into why athletics are so good for all kids.
Stay with the video for the whole thing and make sure you tell your co-workers you've got something in your eye.
I'm directing a video this morning, then I'm in the office, then I'm on the road for a couple of days.
I know I know, what will you do with out my insightful postings and YouTube videos?
You will cope.
As Moses says Stay Calm, Carry On.
I'll check in Wednesday afternoon if I can.
Drive safe and let's be careful out there.
I am Soccer Dad.
I basically exist to drive my girls to and from Soccer.
It has taken the place of Flying and Golfing.
I will get back to those things someday but in the meantime I give you my Soccer Dad weekend. Friday night: Race home pick up youngest Daughter and race to exhibition game in the wind and the rain. Other Soccer Dad tells me, "Only sissies use umbrellas!"
I'm bewildered by the use of the term "sissies!"
Game ends we head home to get some sleep. Saturday morning: Wake up at 6:15 to get youngest Daughter to 7am practice. I have to leave early so I can drive oldest Daughter to a tournament.
Other Soccer Dad says, "What are you a part-timer?" I'm not even sure what he means but I say, "Umbrellas are for sissies" in an effort to confuse him. Saturday: Drive oldest Daughter to Oshawa for tournament. Watch 2 games and then drive home in tsunami. Sunday: Wake up at 6:15 to drive oldest Daughter back to Oshawa for one game and then back home. Other Soccer Dad yells so loudly he short-circuits my central nervous system.
All in all it was a fine time filled with too many Tim Hortons visits a lot of laughs and some interesting new information.
Apparently Real Men are impervious to the rain, only sissies use umbrellas and the above schedule only qualifies me for "Part-Time" Soccer Dad status.
This began in Colorado as a schools project to start conversations about students futures and to begin looking at shaping a vision for the years to come.
It has since started millions of conversations around the world.
It was originally called Shift Happens and this is version 3. Did you know?
Interesting. For more go here.
Lorraine Kimsa Theatre for Young People is a group that I volunteer with.
(Used to be called YPT. Ah now you know what I'm talking about!)
I've been on the board of directors for three year and I must say it's been an amazing experience.
The staff, the people and the work.
They do amazing theatre for young people and we're getting some nice press for a play about Meth addiction called Cranked.
This is from a recent article in the Globe and Mail. As Cranked opens, Stan, a young hip-hop MC, is comparing the slow, lumbering zombies of old movies to the speedier ones of today's horror flicks. To him, the modern running undead seem more realistic: "When you crave flesh ... When it is the sole thing in the universe that you can focus on and you want it as bad as your next breath of air? Oh yeah, you will run."
LKTYP does plays for kids of all ages and obviously Cranked isn't for your 5 years-old. But it's perfect for your teen or soon to be.
Check out the rest of the article here and for more info and tickets go here.
Thank you.
Al Wilson was an 70's R+B singer who had a hit with Show and Tell. He was 68.
A lot of people wouldn't remember it but for me it was a tune that I played a lot when I first got into Radio. (1977-CHAB Moose Jaw).
It was part of bunch of tunes that were particular to that decade that I never hear much anymore.
Boz Scaggs-Dirty Lowdown, Leo Sayer, Heart-DreamBoat Annie, Doobie Brothers-Blackwater and On and On -STepheh Bishop.
So here's a little show and tell and after a bonus 70's blast from The Brothers Johnson.
Posted by Humble on April 23, 2008 @ 08:37|Permalink
Shadenfraud gone Wild.
Shadenfraud is a German word to describe "enjoying the suffering of others..."
Leave it to them to have just the right word for that.
I bring it up because that's all Leaf Fans seem to have left. Shadenfraud over the Senators loss and subsequent ousting from the Stanly Cup playoffs.
That's too bad.
Yesterday I wasn't able to blog here but I was a busy commenter over at Mike Boons joint and his entry Happiness is a Sweep of the Sens!
How sad I thought. If ever there was a fan base that couldn't afford to throw stones at anyone it would be the Leaf Nation.
But there they are talking all sorts of trash.
This was from Mikes original entry:.....It's a fantastic feeling, but it makes me nostalgic for the days we used to knock the Sens out of the playoffs. It seems like yesterday I wrote this entry after we ousted the Senators in 7 back in 2004. We met the Sens in the playoffs 4 times in 5 years and took 'em out every single damn time. Sweet, sweet memories...
I wrote back: Are you high?
Sweet sweet memories?
Please.
At least Ottawa has done something the Leafs haven't in 4 years- make the playoffs and uh weren't they in the Stanly Cup finals last year?
Sure they sucked and lost but at least they were there, the Leafs just sucked and lost and went back for more sucking and losing.
Trish then chimed in:Last year I went to a few ottawa blogs and heckled them. This year I'm going to spare them the embarrassment. So the Leafs didn't make the playoffs, but there's nothing worse than going down in four straight... :D :D :D :D
I countered:"There's nothing worse than going down in 4 straight!"
Yes there is. It's not making the playoffs for 4 years and not being in the Stanly Cup finals since Sargent Pepper was a new release.
Holy crap. Figure it out Leaf fans Toronto is the laughing stock,not Ottawa. Why? Because your team is so God awful that all you have left is hating another team and the sweet memories of beating them in the playoffs. The playoffs you haven't been in sine the early part of this century.
And on and on it went. Frightening really if it wasn't so hysterical. I just don't get how Leaf Fans are so blind to the fact that Ottawa, as sucky as losing four straight and crapping out in the regular season after a great start is, it's still better than not making the playoffs and not making it to the Cup Finals since 1967!
But try as I might I can't get through.
This was from the last comment: We've only been reminded by the likes of howard that the team's performance has been lousy. But those proud of their team's under achievement are laughable, because evidently they don't grasp the goal of hockey, which is an ultimate one. There is no trophy for second place, or sixteenth after all.
Funny huh? A Leaf Fan talking about the "Under-achieving" and the "Ultimate goal!" Christ in a hand-basket don't these people hear themselves? Shadenfraud gone wild.
Since I introduced this word a couple of weeks ago I've had quite the reaction.
Vagenius a word I coined to describe smart, hot women who have that "librarian" look has been taking off.
Tina Fey, Lisa Loeb, Mary Louise Parker. Mike Boon wrote about it and changed the spelling. I like it. Originally I spelled it Vag-i-nius...but Mike
spells it Vag-enius and I liked that better.
Makes sense? Hot chicks/smart. Vag-Genius. VaGenius.
So there you have it.
Today's VaGenius-Pamela Adlon.
She's a tiny, hot, smart, little number with a filthy mouth. She was in that clip of Lucky Louie I posted yesterday (check it out below) and recently she was in the show Californication and was most excellent-and a little dirty.(Not such a bad thing.)
Posted by Humble on April 15, 2008 @ 07:29|Permalink
Introducing...Lucky Louie.
This is a cool sitcom that aired on HBO for a while and is now on The Movie Network.
It's stars comic Louise C.K. and is not only funny but dirty-funny.
Heres some Wiki-info... Lucky Louie is an American television sitcom about a family headed by Louie, starring Louis C.K., and Pamela Adlon. It premiered in the United States on HBO on June 11, 2006. HBO ordered 12 episodes of the series which aired during the 2006 summer season. In addition, eight scripts for a second season were ordered.[1] In September 2006, however, HBO announced that the show had been cancelled.[2] This cancellation was unusual because it was not related to ratings, as the show steadily built in ratings, and had a supportive fan-base. More likely, it was the result of a poor response by critics and press, which HBO feels are important to its image. In Canada, Lucky Louie can be seen on Movie Central on Sunday evenings at 9:30pm PT and on The Movie Network at 10:30pm CST.
Yes I know-Tiger's sucking but it's only Saturday...
Okay, I get it. Thanks Thom R for the e-mails updates yesterday as Brandt SnerdlyRacket or whatever his name is, beat Tiger and is in second after 2 rounds. Yes I have the internet and TV too!
It's hard to explain but the simple version is this. Tiger hit it crap, got some bad bounces and anyone else would have shot 76-76 and missed the cut.
TW is -1 and is only a halfway' decent round away from being in contention. Don't bet against it.
Also the leaders Trever Immelman( who's got a ridonkulously good swing) and Brandt SnidelyCracker are going to be feeling a little tightness today that they are unfamiliar with.
It's supposed to be cool,windy and chokey out there today so a Tiger Woods 69 or better could go a long way. We'll see.
Good on Mike Weir, he's hanging in and if not TW then it's always cool seeing Mikey play well.
Here were my predictions from Thursday and the (actual #)
Prediction-first round score
Tiger 71(72)
Weir 73(73)
Phil 69(71)
Guyyou'veneverheard of 68(68+69) (That would be Trever My Swings too-Freaking good for words and Brandon SneakerCaller!)
Favorite Masters e-mail from Alison. I'm pretty sure you won't see this for days but...love watching the Masters every year, I also am a huge Tiger fan, really, how can you not be? Just remember when your girls are older to not let them have their weddings on Masters weekend...I had unknowingly booked my Dad's golf club for my wedding on Masters weekend and my Dad said if I still wanted him to pay the bill I had better pick another date...I think of that and laugh every year at this time...
Now a little Golf fun for everyone.
Happy Masters.
Posted by Humble on April 12, 2008 @ 09:01|Permalink
Super Vaginius...Tina Fey.
....declares April Tina Fey month. Check out this article from Rob Salem. I am telling you this chick is funny and sexy and cool. Her show 30 Rock is the can't miss Thursday night comedy for a variety of reasons-the writing, the cast and the guest stars. Seems like a familiar formula that most shows can't get right.
If you've never seen 30 Rock you won't believe how good Alec Baldwin is in it and after a couple of weeks and you'll be hooked.
I also figured out why a lot of guys dig Vaginius Tina Fey. It's the glasses. We think aw, yeah she's all prim and proper but when those glasses come off....
Don't pretend you don't know what I mean.
This past week I caught up with a few flicks. Some good, some the Dewy Cox story.
Let's begin then shall we.
I was in London, Ont earlier in the week and I watched a flick on the Spank-0-Vision. I wasn't in the mood for Hotel porn which is pretty expensive when you figure you only need like 5 minutes of the movie.
So I ordered Walk Hard, The Dewey Cox story. I wanted to like it. Really I did. I like a good stupid movie, probably more than the next guy, but this wasn't funny-stupid, it was just stupid-stupid.
Although I will say John C. Reily was good as always but that was it. Oh yeah the chick from The Office played his wife and she has nice boobs. This was produced and co-written by Judd Apatow, the guy who's done the funny-stupid movies, Talladega Night and Knocked-up so I was expecting more. All I can say is give it a miss when it comes out on DVD and Blue Ray tomorrow.
This weekend I took my daughter Spencer, (Aka-SpenJamin Franklin, Spengi, Spen-Francisco)
to Horton Hears a Who and dang it all it was pretty good. This Horton fellow is one remarkable Elephant who can not only act up a storm but apparently does his own stunts!
Lots of laffs and merry-making from Jim Carey and Steve Carell and Carol Burnett. (She is an evil Kangaroo. Yes she is.) If your an 6-11 year old or the parent of one them critters, I would highly recommend it. Or if your high, it might be fun too.
Finally Lou Schizas and myself hung out like men and went to a Guy-Movie. First we ate raw fish and drank scotch and beer and then we saw The Bank Job. I liked it pretty well. It stars Jason Stathom and it had that cool English Snatch/2 Smoking Guns feel with a little Heist thrown in for good measure.
Jason Stathom has quickly become the U.K. Bruce Willis without the smirk. He's been good in a lot of great movies as well as decent in some stinky ones.
The Bank Job is based on a true story and it's definitely the kind of movie your girlfriend or wife won't want to see. Although it's not super-violent, it's got a pretty good plot and the accents aren't so thick you need subtitles. (Snatch?) I also recommend Scotch and Beer as a way to make any movie better.
Please enjoy responsibly.
Posted by Humble on April 7, 2008 @ 08:11|Permalink
David Spade is funny. I forgot but now....
...I remember.
I was thinking about David Spade the other day but I can't remember why.
This happens a lot when you start getting older.
"Uh, I think I'm hungry, but maybe I should wait for supper, I'm not sure what I'm in the mood for...oh yeah, I wonder what David Spade is doing these days?"
He's hosting something on Comedy Central called The ShowBiz Show and he' s still really funny. And short. But tall when it comes to the funny.
Have a look.
This bit is called "BlackBerry Intervention"
Just a couple of things that have been rattling around inside my big empty head.
Tim Hortons is selling roast beef sandwiches. I don't know but something seems wrong about that.
Yes I like their egg-salad and chicken wrap offerings but roast beef doesn't seem like the kind of thing that Timmies should be messing with.
I mean egg-salad can be made by some part time kid in grade 12 but roast beef isn't the type of thing that should be handled by someone in a hair net between drive through orders.
While I'm talking Tim's- I should confess that I can't stand the TH coffee. I know that' s un-Canadian of me. But it's the truth. The Java is weak, thin and fairly bland. I don't drink coffee anymore but when I did I would go to Hortons and order half french vanilla-half coffee. Made it almost drinkable.
I was in London Ontario on a little business the other day and I spent a night in a Hotel. Everything was fine until about 12:30 when the fire alarm went off. BWHOOOP! BWHOOP! BWHOOP!.
Scared the crap out me. Then a voice comes on a speaker and says, "Folks an alarm has been set off on the third floor and we're investigating it."
Great, they're looking into it.
Meanwhile I look down from my 18th floor room and I see the fire department arrive.
This can't be good.
The alarm is still sounding BWHOOOP! BWHOOP! BWHOOP!. This goes on for 15 minutes and then just stops.
No announcement. Now what, I think.
What if the Hotel guy who made the original announcement was over-come by smoke and can't tell me to evacuate.
Needless to say it took me a while to get back to sleep. (Yes I looked down and say the fire department leave-but not for a few groggy moments. Still who knows maybe they missed something and even now the smoke was rising up and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz)
I was back on my board, The Burton Baronthis past weekend with my pal Marc G.
Awesome Spring-snow conditions and I like it more every time I do it. It's a different type of vibe than skiing and I think part of why I like it is it makes me feel like a cool young guy instead the un-cool old guy I really am.
Marc G took a little digital camera video of me. Yes now you can watch 40 second of Hhdotcom on a snowboard. Yikes.
I will say that he did a fine job but I think his camera was running a bit slow!
Fred Patterson's Father died on Friday morning. He was 83. He was also one of the nicest, kindest people you could ever meet.
I know the family is saddened but relieved as well as Richard "Big Dick" wasn't having the best time of it these last few months and its hard to watch someone you love suffer.
I spoke with Fred last night and he seems fine. Sad but fine and he'll take care of things the way he always does for his family.
He wrote a very compelling piece on his blog. Take a second and read it here.
I met Fred's parents when I first moved to Toronto in 1989 and I always enjoyed any encounter I had with them. During the Humble and Fred show we talked about them a great deal. Fred's mom Junie, the funny, outspoken one and Dickie the quieter, gentle-man who would do anything for anybody.
I feel bad for Fred because I know what he's going through. It will take time to stop stinging and there will be a lot of sad days ahead. He will get through it because he has a lot of support from friends and family, but it will still be hard.
For me hearing about Dick made me think about my Dad all over again. I was curious to see what I wrote just after he died. It still hurts to read it today these 17 months later.
Chris "Punch" Andrews passed away on the weekend. After his 7 month battle with lung cancer he died. He was one terrific guy.
only worked him for a couple of years and even then only saw him once in a while, but he was one hell of a human being and a very positive person to be around.
A few weeks ago I spoke to him and posted this and even though he was having trouble breathing, he told me how much my call meant. That was Punch. Always trying to make others feel good.
Now all I can think of is: too young, too bad.
For those you who never got to meet or hear Punch have a look at this. He put on a real "Show" when he was on the Radio, it was meant to be fun and of course to make others feel good!
RIP Punch.
Posted by Humble on March 31, 2008 @ 07:46|Permalink
Dan Duran is 50 Today!
(Sung vaguely to the tune of "Happy Anniversary" the Flintstones version.) Dan Duran is 50, Dan Duran is 50, Dan Duran is 50. DanDuran is Fi-if-Tee.
Dan DuranDuranDuranDuranDuran is 50. Dan DuranDuranDuranDuranDuran is Fi-if-Teeeeee! (Repeat until exhausted.)
I have known Dan Duran, man and boy 30 years. He has been the best man at both of my weddings(-The first was a marriage of "convenience"). He is the Godfather of my oldest and his boy is my Godson.
He is about the finest guy you'd ever want to know.
We've lived in Moose Jaw, Calgary, California and Toronto at the same time. We've been roommates, work-mates and pals. We have ingested copious amounts of legal and non-legal substances together and very few other humans make me laugh the way he does. No other human finds me as funny.
We've been through the good and bad times that come from being around one another for 3 decades. When we first met both of our parents were still alive, now only his Father is.
He stood by as one of my first serious relationships ended and I was there when one of his psycho girlfriends threw all his stuff on the lawn and then stalked him for months after. (Much funnier than it sounds.)
He is incredibly honorable, reliable, honest and clumsy.
He has almost chain-sawed his own face off among a lifetime of dropping things, smacking himself in the head and walking into stuff.
He and I and our friend Jeff have been lucky enough to be life-long friends and end up living in the same place. It's a rare luxury for guys in our business.
Tonight we'll head out together, drink responsibly and tell Dan Duran stories and believe me there are many.
Mainly though it'll be about saying...Dan Duran is 50, Dan Duran is 50, Dan Duran is 50. DanDuran is Fi-if-Tee.
Dan DuranDuranDuranDuranDuran is 50. Dan DuranDuranDuranDuranDuran is Fi-if-Teeeeee!
Prior to the weekend I shot 3 cat-training videos. Again, I'm not kidding.
It was an interesting experience. Interesting in "The cat is tired and needs another break so let's just shut down the production again" type of interesting.
In the end we got it done but let's just say even trained cats are cats, if you know what I mean. "You want me to do what and eat the treat. Maybe. Or maybe I'll just sit here while you humans chew through some more money!"
Friday night DW and I flew to Kingston. Great flight, smooth air-25 knot tail wind and rocking the Cardinal to the tune of 180mph. Winter flying can give you some great speed.
We ate a place my buddy Marc recommended called Chez Piggy and if you're ever in the K-town do it. It has a nice vibe and great food. One of the founding members of the Lovin Spoonful Zal Yanofski started it years ago and it's a local fav.
Then, full of Piggy food, we flew back to Toronto with the clearest night sky you can imagine.
Saturday-Boarded.(See below) Sunday-Watched Tiger suck.(See below) Sunday night we took the girls to 10,000 BC. It didn't totally suck. But I would caution you this way. If you're not bringing your kids or some nieces or nephews I'd save it for a rental or PPV.
I was rolling my eyes a lot and Randee and I were mocking it throughout but the girls dug it so I can't hate it.
I give it 2.7 Fake-looking Woolly Mamouth's out of 6.
Today I'm back to work and facing several days of looking at cat-training footage.(See above) I'm the Peter Jackson of cat-training videos and this is my trilogy.
Now if we could only have gotten the cat to eat one of the sponsors treats!
Posted by Humble on March 24, 2008 @ 08:17|Permalink
I came, I saw, I shredded.
Early in January I wrote about my adventures learning to ride a snowboard.
Quite painful and at times I wasn't sure I wanted to persevere.
Well I did and it was worth it.
In the last three months I've boarded 10 times and I can't believe:
A)How much fun it is.
B)How much more fun it is than skiing.
Sorry skiers. It is.
Also I've gotten pretty good. Considering how much I sucked to begin with.
This past weekend Charlie and I went to Blue Mountain with MG(buddy and former Team Gold soccer coach) and his kids and we had a blast.(Make sure to order the Litre of beer at Skool!)
I also bought my first new board. Well almost new, but mine. A Burton Baron.
Burton is the big name in Snow Boarding and mine is cool.
Blue was having an end of season sale and I got if for half.
The freedom, the connection to the hill, the thrill. Way different than on ski's and I can't get enough. Usually at this time I year I'd be all itching to play golf but for the next few weeks I'm going to find any snow I can and go.
Dang these short Canadian Winters!
I'm working this week on a series of cat-training videos.
Yes I am and you can't stop me.
The amount of prep that goes into shooting cat-training videos would blow your mind.
Seriously.
Studio, sets, designers, cameras, sound-guy, make-up, catering, production-assistants all go into this huge production that will end up being 3-5 minutes videos of cat-training magic.
I love doing this stuff. The prep is interesting. "Hmmmm how should I frame the cat jumping through a hoop? What would Spielberg do?"
I especially like the shoot day.
I say, "Quiet on the set."
Then, "Roll camera!"
And "Action."
It's cool.
Later I say "Cut," but I like "Action" better.
The greatest thing about working on a set is the food. It's non-stop. Breakfast, snacks, lunch, snacks, break, snacks and then more snacks.
Snacks are the life-blood of the shoot and heaven forbid that everyone isn't stuffing their pie-holes for even a minute.
Every time I yell "Cut" I lose half the crew to eating.
I'll let you know when this epic will be available to view.
Maybe someday I'll get a call from Amblin. "Is this Howard Glassman?" "Steven just loved what you did with the Cat training picture!"
My wife and girlfriend Randee is off to learn more about Web 2.O and digital marketing today and this dude Mitch Joel is one of the speakers at her forum.
She is looking to upgrade her skill set(which is vast to begin with. Hire her for chrissake!) and this is a great avenue to do that.
She sent me MJ's site TwistImage and I dug it. So will you.
He recently posted something called 15 Reasons Why Blogging Matters and it's an interesting read.
I liked reason #14. Legacy -
Google has a very long tail. Whatever you Blog about becomes part of our global and collective history. It's there (in some form or another) forever. While that will scare some, I think it's one of the coolest things ever. It forces me to think long and hard about what I'm going to post and, more importantly, how that post is going to look in two-three years time. Whatever you Blog about is going to be there forever.
Hmm.Forever?
I may have to rethink my position on the Monkey Videos.
For a few years I worked at the Mix with a guy named Punch Andrews. He did weekends and filled in on our show doing traffic.
I won't say that we were best friends, just a good dude you'd see in the halls who was always smiling and upbeat.
Punch isn't doing so well these days. He has incurable lung cancer and is in the final stages.
Yet he's still the most positive guy.
Last week, wheezing on oxygen, he dropped in on the Jim Richards show on CFRB and it was amazing Radio. Riveting, compelling and authentic. All the things that most Radio isn't.
Have a listen here.
I spoke with Jim on the weekend and told him what a great broadcast I thought this was.
I also talked to Punch.
For the last 5 months or so he and I have been trading voice messages and Sunday we finally talked.
He sounds like a guy who has just finished a 100 yard dash and is gasping for breath.
Yet he is the most positive guy.
He told me my call made his day. I didn't know what to say. No one does really.
I told him he was on my mind and that I know everyone is pulling for him.
He had a smile in his voice even though I knew he was in pain.
Kind of puts things into perspective doesn't it? If you know him reach out, if you don't and you're looking to direct a prayer or just good wishes somewhere the Punch-Man could use it.
You won't find a more deserving or positive guy.
I've been working on a new commercial voice demo and it's finally done. I had a lot of help from my pal Jeff Lumby in terms of direction(Julie too!) and my buddy Ric Randmaa did the music and editing.
It will soon be up on the Fountainhead Talent website, but here's an early listen.
It's a very different approach for me and I was trying to showcase a less "announcer-ish" vibe, as that style is no longer in demand. Much like myself.
Soccer. Three times on Saturday. I drive, watch, pick-up, feign interest and then we go home.
I shouldn't say feign interest. I enjoy the games and endure the practices but I'm a Dad and there's not where I'd rather be than watching my kids play a sport.
After last week's American Idol, Spencer's been obsessed with Your so Vain the song the girl with the long blond hair sang and Simon and the other nitwits loved.
Spenny sings all the time anyway but it was kind of surreal on Saturday, sitting around playing that song for her on the guitar while she warbled a tune that is 3 times older than her.
Strange.
My brudda Steve is in town to cook up more CBC business that will eventually not involve me.
It's also his 62nd birthday soon so we had him over for dinner and some cake. We sang happy birthday to him and the girls made sure not to disturb him when he dozed off after dinner.
Old people are so cute.
I finally flew a plane for the first time since December. This is the longest layoff I've had since I got my license 4 years ago.
A combination of work and weather. One has been great and the other has sucked-ass.
We flew to Hanover, near Owen Sound, had a massive breakfast of bacon, ham and sausages(all kosher) and flew home.
Anyway it's not quite like riding a bike. Well it is I guess, if the bike had wings, was going 160 miles an hour and if you lose your balance you end up a smoking hole in some farmers field.
I was a little rusty on some systems stuff and my landing was on the clunkier side but I did remember how much I loved being in the air.
Happy Friday. Hey at least it's not -400 anymore...
Even though it was -400 yesterday I had a very enjoyable time hosting the Big Brothers and Big Sisters ski day out in Caledon.
Strange how it can be cold as the moon but if you're dressed properly and doing something fun you can spend hours outside.
This is my second time hosting this day and it was a blast. Nice people, great organization and a tidy hundred G's raised.
I got back on a snowboard for the first time since I learned during the Christmas break and it was a success. In so much as I didn't break anything or hobble myself.
I wrote about my calamitous time at the beginning of my boarding career and to be honest I was a little nervous about going back. After I wrote that entry I found out I really did break my thumb and my arse bone is still a bit tender.
Nevertheless I was much more comfortable and I really dig the sport. It's way more fun when you're not falling constantly. Yesterday I only fell a couple of times-mainly getting off the chairlift. Dang that contraption to hell.
I'm doing the same thing I do most weekends. Taking my kids to soccer practice, to soccer games and home from said practices and games. Also I'm going to hang with my pal Lou Schizas, (tied for smartest guy I know-yes DW with you!) my Bro Steve is coming in and I may actually get back in a plane for the first time in 2 and half months.
I hope you all have a great weekend and if we're all lucky it'll warm up to -200!
Posted by Humble on February 29, 2008 @ 07:30|Permalink
Stuff White people like...
You may have already heard of the site stuffwhitepeoplelike.com, I think MB may have had something on it or even me...to tell you the truth I have more and more trouble keeping track of stuff like this lately and I'm too lazy to go look it up.
Never the less. Stuffwhitepeoplelike.com is very clever little site started only a couple of months ago by former Toronto guy Christian Lander and its filled with little bon mots about well, stuff white people like.
Stuff like Asian girls, bicycles, Barack Obama, knowing what's best for poor people, threatening to move to Canada and other such ironic, internet giggles.
The thing that caught my attention is the hits.
The SWPL blog started January 18, 2008 and has so far been hit 4.3 million times! Wow. Those are Mike Boon numbers.
In contrast Hhdotcom started September 2006 and has so far had nearly 4.3 hits.
Maybe Hhdotcom is not Stuffwhitepeoplelike enough!
TSFA. WTF?
Well kids here's the Federal budget explained. We got a bunch of extra dough, nearly 13 Billion, and our Guys in Charge are going to give us back about 5 million of it.
This year.
Sure the TSFA will cost the Feds nearly 400 million by 2013 but in the meantime they kick us back sweet F-All and the only real benefit will be to financial planners.
That and the blithering Liberals aren't going to topple the Government...again.(Frankly I'm so sick of hearing that threat I wish they'd go ahead and do so they could have their asses handed to them for real in a general election which they know they'd lose which is why they only threaten a non-confidence vote.)
What about the TSFA already?
Tax-Free Savings Account is what that is and you know it's not a bad thing. Basically you get to put away 5 grand a year, have it grow and compound without the interest being taxed. Plus you get to access it, that is withdraw and re-invest, in a way that is less penile and clunky than an RRSP. Speaking of Penile and Clunky for the entire TSFA scoop have a look here and try and decipher it on your own.
Posted by Humble on February 27, 2008 @ 07:27|Permalink
Some number's for Crunching.
Thanks to Marketing mag for these...
Writers Strike..........................15 weeks. US DVD Sales 2997................$24.4 Billion. Writers residuals per DVD........$00.4 to $00.8 cents per DVD. Ratings increase CBC Fall 07...23%. Ratings decline Hockey Night...11%. Canadian average sports participation per day........30 minutes. Canadian average TV watching per day..................79 minutes. (Dam you two hour American Idol!)
For reason I can't really explain "I drink your milkshake!" has been a huge viral buzz-phrase.
It's from the movie There Will Be Blood and it's spoken by over-actor extrodinaire Daniel Day Lewis.
I haven't seen this flick yet but I have heard of this.
Here's the scene from the movie.
Here is some YouTube-Dood with his version. Just one of many.
Here's another version from a YouTuber who I guess is a Jimmy Kimmel regular.
At least now when the kids at the office start talking about "drinking peoples milkshakes" at least you'll have clue one what they're talking about.
Your welcome.
Posted by Humble on February 24, 2008 @ 18:59|Permalink
Old People are so Sweet.
A fuzzy story about a couple of sweet old gals.
Someone who teaches at a middle school in Safety Harbour , Florida , forwarded the following letter.The letter was sent to the principal's office after the school had sponsored
a luncheon for the elderly. An old lady received a new radio at the lunch
as a door prize and was writing to say thank you.
God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior
citizens luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at the Safety Harbour
Assisted Home for the Aged. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone and I
want to thank you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady. My roommate is
95 and has always had her own radio; but before I received one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping. The other day her radio fell off the night stand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. She asked if she could listen to mine, and I told her to fuck off.
Thank you for that opportunity.
Sincerely, Edna
Posted by Humble on February 19, 2008 @ 11:00|Permalink
Happy Weekend. I gotta go.
I'm back downtown to ACME Pics today for more commuting/fun-grown-up work.
I had a great time yesterday recording some VO for my pal Mike Boon and his software company.
Check it out here.
This weekend it's just me and the girls as Momma is in FLA celebrating her mother's 50th birthday!
(Okay, maybe the Mother-in-law is just a bit older, but why waste a perfectly good opportunity to suck up to her?)
It's soccer practice, maybe a game, a movie or two, endless take-out food and then the girls go skiing. Monday it's all about the family day, which for my daughters means they are looking for some friends to hang out with! You know this is one I have to give to the Dalty. Finally a well deserved day off for winter-worn Canooks in the bleakest stretch of crappy weather I can remember.
Sure there are people against this because of the economic implications. But those aside, (and those will be absorbed and accounted for in the years to come) it's nice to have a long weekend between Christmas and the next Super Christian Holiday.
Enjoy the extra day with or without your family.
h
Isn't that what we used to say as kids.
Happy Valen-"Times" day.
I have three women in my life that own my heart. Randee, Charlie and Spencer. Yes they all have boys names and vagines.
Like most guys I will wait till the last minute and run out to Dominion, grab a few cards, a rose or three and run home to greet my gals.
Tonight we'll do the V-Day dinner together. I wouldn't trade it for anything.
I thought you might like to read some of my Valentines thing I wrote for the CBC Radio show that just ran.
ST.VALENTINE WAS THE ORIGINAL MAN LOOKING FOR SOME WAY TO WOO WOMEN AND LIKE THE REST OF US HE NEEDED THE HELP OF A PRE-WRITTEN CARD, SOME CHOCOLATE AND A BOUQUET OF 60 DOLLAR ROSES THAT WERE JUST 15.95 A MERE 24 HOURS BEFORE.
VALENTINE’S DAY A ROMANTIC ROAD MAP FOR MEN AND YOU KNOW HOW WE LOVE ASKING FOR DIRECTIONS… BUT ONCE A YEAR WE’LL PULL OVER, ROLL DOWN THE WINDOW AND SAY TO CUPID,”HEY LITTLE FAT DUDE WITH THE BOW, I’M LOST… HOW THE HELL DO I GET TO THE CORNER OF LOVE AND ROMANCE OR AT LEAST GET LAID!”
MEN ARE CLUELESS RIGHT FROM THE START, MY 13 YEAR OLD HAD A LITTLE BOYFRIEND LAST YEAR..HE KNEW NOTHING…THEY BARELY SPOKE, HARDLY ACKNOWLEDGED EACH OTHER IN PUBLIC , NEVER HAD SEX AND ONLY COMMUNICATED BY TEXTING ON MSN… I THOUGHT WHAT A ROMANTIC LOSER..THEN I REALIZED “HEY THEY COULD HAVE BEEN MARRIED!”
IT’S ABOUT EXPECTATION AND FULFILLMENT.
WOMEN EXPECT US TO DO SOMETHING AND WE EXPECT THAT IF WE DO,
AT LEAST WE WON’T BE GANG-SHUNNED FOR NOT FULFILLING OUR VALENTINES DAY DUTIES.
IT’S LIKE THOSE PEOPLE WHO HOST A PARTY AND SAY “OH DON’T BRING A THING”
TRY SHOWING UP WITH OUT A BOTTLE OF WINE OR SOMETHING AND SEE WHAT AN ASS EVERYONE THINKS YOU ARE.
NO VALENTINE PRESENT IS LIKE THAT ONLY TIMES A THOUSAND.
HEY IF YOU WANT TO BE THE GUY THAT SAYS “OH SORRY HONEY I THINK THAT VALENTINES THING IS TOO CRASS AND COMMERCIAL AND THEREFORE I’LL BE GIVING YOU NOTHING THIS YEAR!”
WELL GOOD ON YOU MATE. ENJOY LIFE ON NEVER-GETTING-LAID-ISLAND.
IT’LL BE QUIET JUST YOU, THE DUDE THAT BROUGHT NO WINE AND THAT OTHER WEIRD GUY THAT ALWAYS GIVES PEOPLE SOMETHING HE MADE FOR CHRISTMAS.
Speaking of Radio. For those H+F fans who are still around, Mike Boon has posted the PodCast of Love. Maybe this is what you really need to warm your Valentimes Heart today.
Too Cold.
I'm now officially sick of Winter.
Winter can suck me.
Immature?
Maybe. But I'm tired of trying to be optimistic and upbeat about the weather.
"Hey, it's great outside. It's a Winter Wonderland!"
That got old the first week of January.
Hey Winter thanks for coming by now F-away.
Posted by Humble on February 12, 2008 @ 07:51|Permalink
Just to catch up...
I'm directing a video Friday so I will be up and out at first light.
I'm hating the commute but loving the work. Sound familiar?
My pal Dave White made an excellent point the other night about how I'm just not used to the traffic nightmare that I face everyday. Most people my age, he said, would be more adjusted to the grind than I am. (I believe most people my age or any other age are more adjusted than I am period. )
He's right. I've been excempted from having to slug it out every day on the QEW/Gardiner roadway of nonsense.
Again, not complaining, just reporting. Okay maybe complaining a little bit. Hey anyone know any good bathroom guys? I've got a leaky shower and the floor is rotting and the kitchen ceiling is leaking and I've got to have the whole shower stall replace and re-tiled.
Problem is I don't have a "Guy!" You know the Guy you call to do this type of stuff or at least he knows a Guy.
So if you have a bathroom/shower Guy that would be great. We are hanging with two of my best mates this weekend. Dan D and Jeff L. We're all getting together with our wives for a grown-up dinner type party. Can't wait. The strange thing is this will be the third time including New Years that I've hung with Dan and only the first time since early December that I even seen Lumby. I guess that happens to everyone. The ebb and flow of freindship.
No matter. Minutes after we see each other we'll be laughing at the same stupid crap we have been for years. And our chicks still won't know why. Saturday night I'm going over to the Boon Man's home for dinner. This is our first foray into the heart of the Mad Genius and it should be great. Mike has become a good pal of mine and he's got a sweet family as well. I just hope the Leafs don't have an off night and put MB into a funk. Wait a second that's all the Leafs have. He should be used to it by now. So it's eating/drinking/driving kids to soccer(not after drinking of course!)/boarding/ and a 5 year olds birthday party. (My buddy Lou S's daughter is celebrating #5 with a skating party. Congrats Louis.)
You all have a good weekend too.
Bewell
h
Posted by Humble on February 7, 2008 @ 17:29|Permalink
The Great (CBC) Debaters.
The Debaters is on this weekend.
I had a blast taping this with my longtime pal Judy Croon and getting to hang with some of the best standups in the country.
I had never seen host Steve Patterson work but he is the real deal and a very nice dood.
If you miss it I'll try and post it on Hhdotcom next week.
This entry is from the Debaters Blog.
Till Death do us part??
Posted by Tod Elvidge on February 05 at 03:09 PM
In the spring a young man's fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love... but how about the young women?
Romantic realist Judy Croon tries to convince author and comedian "Humble" Howard Glassman that Valentine's Day does nothing to promote love.
Next up on our hearts and flowers episode, surprisingly romantic Al Rae does his best to prove to newly single Deborah Kimmett that "till death do us part" is still relevant.
Life is like a box of chocolates, and so is The Debaters -- it's sometimes sweet, sometimes bitter and occasionally filled with nuts. Tune in with your sweetheart and fall in love with The Debaters all over again.
Airs Saturday, February 9th at 6:30 PM and Monday, February 11th at 8:30 PM on Radio One
This is the dying professor. He is all over the YouTube and recently guested on Oprah.
This is from his Last Lecture.
Watch it all and try not to choke up at the end.
The Best of Both Worlds. Well at least for my kids...
This Hannah Montana. Her Dad is Billy Ray Cyrus. She is a sweet, talented singer/actress and
your 10 year old loves her.
At least mine does.
We took Spenny to the Hanna Montana in 3-D movie and she loved it.
I, like a lot of other Dad's, snoozed through parts of it.
The concert film made nearly 30 million on the weekend. That's a lot of 10 year olds and their parents.
The best part was the 3-D previews. There are going to be more and more 3-D flicks on the way and I can't wait.
The effects look amazing. Not to mention getting to rock the cool Roy Orbison sun-glasses.
Posted by Humble on February 4, 2008 @ 08:45|Permalink
You want money? Open up an Pet Emerg...
Saturday night. Come home, dogs eaten some chocolate chip cookies. Maybe 4 or 5.
No biggy right?
Uh, yes.
Dog's acting all excited,(high) and his heart rate is up.(Chocolate toxicity.)
Off to Pet Emergency. (Music up and sirens blaring...cut away of Dad, Daughter and Dog rushing through the slushy streets of Oakville.)
Arrive at PE where my money turns to liquid and starts to flow out of my pocket.
ER fee/ER exam/ER induce Vomiting-$272.42!
Now I want to vomit.
But it gets better. Way better.Or worse.
After an hour of watching the DVD of Air Bud in the waiting room, ( Not kidding. Nice TV too. Of course it is, they're charging nearly 300 bucks to make dogs puke.) the Vet tells me they want to keep the Chocolate addict over night.
No probs I say. Then they give me an estimate of costs. $537.08. They do this with a straight face and I get woozy.
But I'm screwed. If I take him home and he croaks then I will be the Shit of of my family and face a life-time of grief. "Oh yeah, if only Daddy would have coughed up the 537 then Tucker would still be with us....!"
$272, plus $537 is $800 freaking bucks.
Of course I say yes and Tucker gets better the next day and all is well.
All is well except I can't stop thinking about what 800 dollars buys you nowadays. So every time I look at him all I can see is Snowblower, skiing in Whistler, decent Lap Top, (lots of Lap Dances), great bottles of wine, flights ect.
I do know this.
Now I want my Daughters to either become Pet Emergency Doctors or marry one.
My pal Tim M sent me this a while back. Playing computer games such as the Nintendo Wii can improve a surgeon's performance in the operating theatre, a US study shows.
Only certain games are effective - those requiring delicate movements.
The fine hand control required to play these games acts as a warm up and hones scalpel skills...
Finally the kind of Doctor training I've been waiting for. I have been looking to hone my scalpel skills for a while, you know without having actually scalpel anything.
Read the rest of the story here.
Boon has been helping me make some changes around here.
I dig the bare bones vibe and lack of green slime-ish coloring. (You can still buy the book, perfect for Valentines Day!...just click on the thingy over on the right.)
Any thoughts or feedback? I'm going back to Vancouver. Weird.
I lived there for a couple of years, worked between La, Seattle and Vancouver for years doing stand-up including appearing at EXPO 86 and then after 87 I never returned until last week.
Now I'm going back for work. I can't wait. I'd forgotten how beautiful the city(and the Lady-People) were. I was constantly having strange echo-memories.
"I used to live there." "I once got high there..." "A girl who lived there gave me crabs..."
Okay maybe I've reminisced too much. American Idol last night. Ryan and Simon just pretend to hate each other. You can tell. They both smirk a bit whenever they are giving each other crap. The one that Simon really doesn't respect is Randy. My youngest will be 10 this weekend. How the hell did that happen. She's the baby of the family and so her getting to double-digits is particularly vexing.
If she's 10, I must be REALLY F-IN OLD!
I had a dream about my Dad last night. This happens quite often and I actually like it.
In it he and I where walking and SMOKING together. I guess my sub-conscience defaulted back to an activity we had done quite often with each other.
It's been a year and 4 months and I miss him every day. I enjoy these nocturnal visits and am always a little bid sad when I wake up after and realize he's not around anymore. I watched American Idol with the girls last night. I've mentioned that I dig A. I. and it's one of the few shows that my whole family watches together.
This season: Simon is softer, Paula's not quite as drugged-out-stupid and Randy hasn't changed. He is so out-witted by Simon that he sometimes just resorts to noises and funny hand-gestures.
Ryan is good. Solid. And tiny. Guitar Hero 3 fever has gripped our family. Even my wife has tried it. My 13 year old rules, my 9 year is most improved and I'm getting better. Last night I had my highest score ever.
When you were young by The Killers. Great song and I ROCKED out at 149,000 points on Medium, including a note-streak of 150. You GHIII people know what I mean.
WE love the Wii. We're having some plumbing problems. By problems I mean that our upstairs shower is leaking and water is bubbling under the kitchen-ceiling and dripping.
We tried super-caulking. I can caulk but my efforts were pitiful compared to Chris the Super Caulker. Today we're going to Def Con 2 and calling in the plumber. Hopefully this is the solution although not as fun as running around talking about having to go upstairs and Caulk like a banshee.
Not really sure what that means either.
I have to start editing the TV spot I directed last week. It's a PSA actually and once it goes to air I'll let you know.
Also this week some cool stuff is happening surrounding another TV thing that I've been working on for a long time. I can't say anything about it either, yet. But it's one of those deals that's a long shot but if it happens it'll be a home run. It seems to be gathering momentum but you never know. I am looking for all the positive vibes I can get so if you have any to spare send them over. I'm going to watch the New England Patriots/Giants game this weekend.
Yes I jumped on the bandwagon a couple of weeks ago. But it's hard to not be fascinated by a team that has a chance to go un-beaten for an entire season.
They're like the anti-Leafs. Speaking of which. I invite all Leaf fans to cheer for Tiger Woods this year. Just to get a break from all the futility.
You see Tiger wins a lot. Last week for instance in his first event of the year he won by 8 shots.
So cheering for him will give Leaf fans a chance to experience success. Finally, Team Red, my new U14/15 indoor soccer team bounced back from a tough loss to win an entertaining game 12-10. A real goaltenders dual!
Hat tricks from Taylor and DD plus doubles from Shelby and Olivia and a single from Rhianna and Charlie G helped Team Red to a nice win.
In case you're keeping track(and I am.) my indoor coaching record is 11-1-2. Yes Cliff Fletcher I am available.
Posted by Humble on January 29, 2008 @ 09:11|Permalink
Skiing, drinking...repeat.
I went to Whistler last Thursday.(My 65th birthday!)
I can't believe it's been nearly 20 years since I skied there.
Amazing. Spectacular and breathtaking.
Not to mention boozy.
I went with a couple of my Soccer Dad buddies and we had a great time.
Here was our itinerary.
Arrive. Drink Beer, Eat. Laugh like idiots.
Wakeup. Ski. Drink beer. Eat. Laugh. Ski. Hot-tub. Drink. Make fun of stuff. Laugh. Drink.
(Also had the best sushi of my life at a place called Sushi Village...tell them Mickey D sent you!)
That was pretty much it.
We spent part of Sunday in Vancouver and it was cool to be back in a city that I used to live in but haven't visited for a long time.
We found a bar, watched some golf (more beer, food and laffs) and then flew home.
It was a lot of fun and part of me kept wondering, "Exactly why did I leave here?"
If I had any transferable skills I'd seriously consider moving back. Of course if I had any transferable skills I'd be working here.
Have a look at the type of skiing and terrain that I'd forgotten about.
Posted by Humble on January 28, 2008 @ 12:42|Permalink
Another day more work on the way.
I have to get out early today. Up first, I have to record a in-flight Radio show featuring today's most exciting Pop music for Oman Air.
I'm not kidding.
Up Second. I'm directing a TV spot with a very well-known Canadian skating superstar. I'm not at liberty to say but his names rhymes with Fnurt Crowning.
It's a full set of crew-camera, lighting, production, make-up, on-set food and I get to yell Action and Cut.
It's a very simple job. A monkey could do it.
I'm surprised more movies and tv shows aren't directed by Monkeys.
I suspect a lot are and we're just not made aware of it.
If we knew we'd be less inclined to spend $8.50(senior price) on a moving picture show.
"This piece of crap was directed by a monkey! I want my $8.50 back!"
This is a work in progress. I'm just feeling out the minimalistic "vibe" for a few days.
I was getting tired of the Slime Green and I had to move on.
Michael Boon is working with me on a different design so we'll see.
In the meantime, the walls are bare and it's time to pick a few new colors.
Check back 3,4, 5 times a day and listen for Traffic and Weather and Plummeting Markets on the "ones."
I came across this while I was searching for "1st Soccer loss" pictures and I couldn't resist throwing it on. It is so true it's too true.
It's truth overload.
The phrase kids use is, "I powned that(game, test, person, ect)" just in case you don't get the reference. It's spelled without the "O". I don't get that either. I'll have to ask Charlie.
Posted by Humble on January 22, 2008 @ 08:31|Permalink
All about Tom C.
Interesting article about Tom Cruise in today National Post.
Actually a quick look at a new book about the actor/Sceintologist.
If you're craving the inside (and blatantly unsubstantiated) scoop on Tom's private life, follow this handy guide straight to the good parts. INSIDE THE ACTOR'S CLOSET
Ever since that homoerotic volleyball scene in Top Gun, the world has wondered about Tom Cruise's sexuality. But Andrew Morton's Tom is a heterosexual.
Page 68 Remember the sex-on-a-train scene in Risky Business? Morton alleges that "while Tom and Rebecca [De Mornay] were nervous before playing the scene, those who snuck onto the closed set are convinced that the answer to the question of 'did they, didn't they' really get it on on camera is a firm yes."
Posted by Humble on January 17, 2008 @ 08:27|Permalink
Gotta.Work. Some. More.
Got some more work downtown today so here's a few things I've been looking over lately. Blue Rodeo.
When I was in Edmonton, my brother Steve and I jammed on guitars to Lost Together by BR.
I forgot how much I like a few of their tunes.
Like this one.
Bullet Proof.
(Note to Steve. Not as easy as Lost Together!)
Posted by Humble on January 16, 2008 @ 08:32|Permalink
Trying to buy the Wii...and GH3.
We want Wii.
We're getting a Wii.
We have ordered Wii.
Be we no get Wii. Yet.
Can't get the Wii for Xmas, tried, failed. Ordered it.
Now the Wii is easy compared to Guitar Hero 3.
Buying GH3 for the Wii is a nightmare and the kind of thing that parents do for their kids that borders on psychotic.
But we must GH3.
Must have GH3 for Wii.
If you play it you will see, why we need GH3 for Wii.
A story, by Dr. Jewz.
Posted by Humble on January 11, 2008 @ 08:38|Permalink
Work. The sequal.
I have a shoot I'm directing today and the call is 7:30.
Good news, the location is out here in the O-dot.
Bad news. No bad news, just this is really the first job I've ever had.
I mean that.
This is real work. Client meetings, endless phone calls, lots of details and long hours.
I love it.
But it really is the first time I've had to be this responsible.
As I said in an earlier post, I used to just wake up make some stupid comments into a
mic and then go home and nap.
Seeya.
Posted by Humble on January 10, 2008 @ 07:05|Permalink
Master Cleanse part 2, day 4.
No food.
No coffee.
No booze.
No nothing.
Lemons, organic maple syrup and cayenne pepper in 10 oz of water.
That's it.
I feel great and this time no headaches on day 2-3. The reason is I haven't had a coffee since late September and so no caffeine withdrawal.
The strangest thing about not eating is not doing anything at meal times. Other than that it's quite easy. Having said that last night I dreamt about sticky rice covered in teriyaki sauce and grilled sweet potatoes.
Weird.
6 more days to go.
Posted by Humble on January 9, 2008 @ 08:37|Permalink
Hey here's something you don't see everday.
This dude had a wedding cake made to look like his wife. Yes he did.
I guess he gets to have his "cake" and eat it too.
Not to mention the bizarre shot of him about to knife his new bride.
Very strange.
The cake looks a lot like Tracy Morgan.
Posted by Humble on January 9, 2008 @ 08:01|Permalink
This is Al Gore's site. Go there. It's very hard to leave.
We all know that Al Gore invented the internet and the environment and florching but I still dig this site. It's called Current...Your World View and whenever I drop by the time she flies.
Have a look and let me know what you think. Or better let Al know. Chance are he already does.
Posted by Humble on January 7, 2008 @ 21:24|Permalink
Grown up work.
I've been working a lot for a couple of different clients lately and it's exciting, challenging and way different than my old job.
My old job didn't require me to talk "Corp-Speak."
I'm sure some of you other grown-ups know what I mean.
I "care-take" the "stake-holders" and make sure the client knows I'm "mindful" of the various points along the "critical-path" all the while keeping the "C-suite" apprised of our progress on the project which will conclude with a big "win-win" for all concerned.
Geez Loo-eez.
In my old job I just had to wake up in the middle of the night and tell a few fart jokes.
This is an excerpt from an e-mail I just wrote. "....Thanks for the help, I appreciate it.
I spoke with our client and she's up to speed on the proposed schedule.
She is available Wednesday which will give us plenty of time
to get the stuff ready to fine tune."
Holy crap..."up to speed" and "fine tune" were never part of my communication before, unless it was let's get those fart jokes up to speed and fine tune our stupid noises!
Posted by Humble on January 7, 2008 @ 20:34|Permalink
I should have read this first...then got on a SnowBoard.
How to avoid SnowBoarding injuries.
I should have read this first.
See the guy with the numbers above. I hurt in many of those places.
So far it's been nearly 2 weeks since I learned to "Ride" and I still can't bend my left thumb cause it's pretty much broken and I have severely bruised my tail-bone which apparently takes forever to heal.
I do however have the use of my right arm again, so you know, I've got that going for me.
I love this sport, I just wish I were 27 instead of 67.
Posted by Humble on January 7, 2008 @ 08:59|Permalink
Happy 08 the year of Short Entries.
Hi nice people.
Hi Howard.
This is going to be the "Year of Short Entries" and lots of "Quotes."
I am going to keep doing this blog but with shorter entries.
This way I can write the same amount but it will seem like I'm doing more.
That is all.
This entry is "finished."
Posted by Humble on January 7, 2008 @ 08:42|Permalink
Happy New Year. Happy nice Bums!
Let's start the New Year with some nice bums!
Hi nice bums.
Hi Hhdotcom.
I thought I'd better do a quick update for you RR's. (Regular Readers.)
Christmakah.
Great time, just me, the mama and the girls. Nice tree, Star of David paper plate on top. Very traditional.
Spent all Xmas day trying to hook up Guitar Hero III on my PC. Found out a lot about video cards and that fact that neither of my computers have the right ones. Sucks. The Wi is on order and I'm trying to get the GH3 unit for that. Any ideas? Btw, I love that dang Guitar Hero like one of my children.
Best game ever, hands down.
Went boarding for 3 days. See below.
New Years Eve.
Party at the Glassmans. We had nearly 25 adults and children at our house and it was a great time.
Some old, some new, some sober, some hammered. My sweet wife worked hard to make every thing look great and I just did what I was told.
We had a wonderful time and at 2am I was asleep. My 13 year and her pal on the other hand were still up and had to be shushed until about 3.
I was just happy to have all the kids and friends there because I know the day is coming when both of my daughters will be spending New Years Eve with their "boyfriends!"
That will be a sad day indeed. Oh well that's why they invented booze.
I'm on the road again.
I have to fly to Calgary today and then Edmonton to do some more work interviewing and directing some corporate videos.
It's pretty sweet as I'll get to visit both of my much-older brothers while I'm there.
Sorry I won't be able to flip too much drivel but next week it's biz as usual and I promise to thrown down the usual junk then.
Happy 2008 and all the best to you and yours.
Posted by Humble on January 2, 2008 @ 08:19|Permalink
1st Entry in a while...YouTube/OPC and Poopy.
My bud Mitch L sent me this bit of OPC 2008!
It's a very bizarre take on toilet-training Japanese style.
Enjoy and Happy Poop Year.
Posted by Humble on January 1, 2008 @ 14:11|Permalink
MERRY CHRISTMAS HHDOTCOMPEEPS.
Hello Nice People.
I'm back from my road trip and I'm ready for a rest.
Last week I was in 4 cities, doing 18 interviews over 5 days. It was great but for the first time in a long time, I'm looking forward to a few days off.
We have our tree up. Yes the CLJ's strike again.(Christmas-Loving-Jews!) We are scaling back on the avalanche of presents but we have some good stuff for the girls including one thing they really want but don't think they're getting. Don't say anything, okay?
This week we'll be heading up to Collingwood for a couple days of skiing. Well, actually I'll be taking snow-boarding lessons. Yes another middle-aged bastard trying to look cool. I've always wanted to try it I just hope I don't end up in traction.
I'm back at work Friday posting some stuff I shot last week and I should be able to throw some drivel up then. Maybe on the weekend too.
I just wanted to thank you all for dropping by here the odd time. I appreciate keeping in touch with you in this way and having an outlet to relate the day to day mundane goings on of my life.
Be well this Holiday Season.
Merry Christmas...Happy Jesus's Birthday and have a great New Year.
H
Posted by Humble on December 24, 2007 @ 10:23|Permalink
Some stuff and then more work.
Hey Hhdotcom peeps. Daddy has to go back downtown for work today which as you know, means less drivel for you kids.
Sorry but these lights don't stay on for free.
Before I forget. You folks that are nostalgic for the old Humble and Fred junk may want to wander over to The Boon for a little taste of the H+F Christmas joy. Check this out and then come back.
I have to scout locations for a shoot I'm directing next week. I like the way that sounds. "Oooh, Mr. "I have to scout locations-director. Don't you have people for that?"
No. I am my own people.
I don't think we'll be talking much next week as I'm going to be in Montreal, Ottawa and Winnipeg for work. I'll tell you about it Monday morning but I just wanted to give you the heads up. I'm also going to be doing some more stuff for Oman Air(Yes I'm not done announcing just yet!) and I've booked on to do some stand-up at a club in Winnipeg next Friday night.
Have a great 2nd last weekend before Jesus' birthday and for crying out loud don't drink and drive. Leave some of that booze for me.
Posted by Humble on December 14, 2007 @ 09:25|Permalink
There's a long winter on its way....
' WINTER '
a poem by Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre
Winter,
F*CK! IT'S COLD.
Posted by Humble on December 14, 2007 @ 09:14|Permalink
Canook Cartoonist Captures aCColades.(Yes a stretch....)
Gary Clement is an editorial cartoonist for the National Post and has been recognized this past year by Time magazine for the cartoon above.
Pretty cool. Read the whole story here.
Posted by Humble on December 13, 2007 @ 10:25|Permalink
Led Zeppelin. Not so much with the caring.
I get that a lot of people were excited about the Zep reunion. Nearly 2 million tried for 20 thousand tickets so it must be a big deal to many folk.
I'm just not one of them.
Other than slow-dancing to Stairway to Heaven in high school, (and rubbing my adolescent boner on Pam Finlayson for 7 and half minutes. Well 5 cause it breaks into that crappy fast part at the end.) I've never really found LZ anything but tuneless and screechy.
Sorry.
I know that's just the type of attitude that could get me an ass-kicking from the Classic Rockers but I'm not too worried. Most of them are in their 60's and too slow to catch me.
Good on you Zeppelin fans, I'm happy your guys got back together. You know, minus the dead drummer. Not to be confused with the Who's dead drummer or the many dead drummers in Spinal Tap.
That's really it, actually.
Whenever I think of the Who, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd or even Aerosmith all I see are Nigel Tuffnel and the rest of Spinal Tap pathetically playing their ear-splitting songs in front of a styro-foam Stonehenge. Too funny.
Posted by Humble on December 11, 2007 @ 10:00|Permalink
Leafs win yet the bashing continues...
Yes, I know the Leafers have won 5 of 6 and aren't sucking as much as before but I keep finding Maple-Bashing in my inbox. Just fun, that's all.
What does Toronto have that Montreal doesn't? Black and white photographs of their last Stanley Cup.
Where do Toronto players get their wives?
Canadian Tire, where else do you get a leaf blower.
What do the Leafs and The Titanic have in common?
They both look good until they hit the ice.
Why don't the Maple Leafs drink tea?
Because the Canadiens have all the cups.
What's the difference between the Leafs and a cigarette machine?
The cigarette machine has PLAYER'S.
Posted by Humble on December 11, 2007 @ 09:54|Permalink
Uh, I gotta go but first...
I have to head downtown again today. I'll be editing a video I directed on Friday, I have a client-call and I have to arrange a 7 city shoot/road trip for me and a camera man. Dang working is fun, but it's like I don't know, having a job or something.
Anyway just a couple of things.
Randee pulled this from the National Post on Friday. It was a contest called "Canada in 6 words or less," to find our countries new unofficial motto.
Some pretty good entries.
"Life, liberty and the pursuit of Hockey-ness!"
"Dominating sports no one else plays!"
"From sea to whining sea."
And the winner, fairly bland-"Canada. A home for the world!"
Sheesh. How bout Canada, we suck, but we suck less than most countries.
I watched about 6 minutes of the Pats-Steelers game. Just long enough to see Brady throw a 60 yard TD. Those fellers seem like a pretty good football squad.
I watched about 6 minutes of the Merril Lynch golf shootout. Just long enough to see Greg Norman lose another tournament by someone else pulling off an amazing shot. Woody Austin(Aqua-man), sank about a 55 foot putt to eliminate Norman from a possible playoff. Golfers will know what I'm talking about.
Ok, I really have to go. I have an hour and 15 minute drive ahead of me. Ooh I wonder what funny bits Mike and Erin will be up to? Or maybe today I'll listen to Andy Barrie. He is earnest and has about 60 people working on his show.
Some days I just turn the Radio off and watch the guy next to me pick his nose till his head caves in.
Posted by Humble on December 10, 2007 @ 08:03|Permalink
Hannukah means Ham and other drivel!
I love this shot.Hey just in time for the Festival of Lights...Ham. Yummy Jewish Ham!
ML tossed this shot my way, apparently he has even more down time than me.
Actually I'm a busy Hannukah Hebe this week. I directed a voice session yesterday and I'm posting it today, then prepping for a video shoot that I'm directing Friday. Oh so this is what it feels like to have a job...yes I remember. This is the first week since I got sh*t-canned that I've had work to do every day of the week. Weird.
I am still working on my little project with Insight Productions and that is moving forward nicely.
By nicely I mean I'm learning lots and I hope to be pitching it soon. After that, who knows.
I am vaguely aware that the Leafs have put an end to their suckk-age for now and that Pinball became CEO or something for the Argos. I know the writers strike continues in Hollywood and that there is some shooting going on in various parts of our city. I say somewhat aware because mostly I drive downtown, work the new gig and then drive back home. This takes up most of my time and therefore the Drivel production may be light today and Friday.
By light I mean a bit today and probably not much tomorrow. (Sniff) I'm going to miss you guys.
I'll try and scribble down some crap later today.
Quick note. My wife made latkes last night and they were awesome. I would like to have a "Win Randee's-Latke" contest where one lucky Hhdotcom person would get to eat one of these potato-filled treats. Too bad I can't e-mail them to you.
Maybe we could all meet for coffee on Saturday and I'll bring you one.
Dang they are satisfying and delicious.
Posted by Humble on December 6, 2007 @ 08:34|Permalink
The CBC Debaters, the Delays and Oman Air.
I spent Sunday, Monday in Regina debating Judy Croon about the very contentious issue of "Does Valentines Day further the cause of Love and Romance?" Ooooh, sparks did fly.
It was fun hanging with comics and doing something completely different on the Radio in front a live studio audience.
Yes we got laughs, no I didn't win-it was a tie!
Saw my Brother Steve, drank with Dan Redican, Judy, the very funny Steve Patterson, Simon Rakoff and Carie Gaetz. Nice way to pass a day or two and the Regina crowds were unbelievable. I think they were just happy to be somewhere warm.
My episode will air in February. I'll let you know.
The flights were delayed there and back because of uh THE SNOW!. Yes the whole thing was backed up due to the Storm and the de-icing and then some ass decided to get off the plane on the way back which slowed things down even more.
I didn't mind too much. Sat next to some funny people, read a mag, chewed some cashews.
We were all a little freaked out that we might have to spend another day in The Queen city (Regina) but we ended up getting back just in time for me to hit the rush-hour crawl going home. Fun.
Finally speaking of flying . I did one of those in-flight Radio shows for an airline on the weekend.
It was weird, this was the first song-introducing I'd done in quite some time. (Oh there's a skill that never wanes...)
So if you're flying Oman Air some time in the near future you might hear a young prairie boy named Howard Glassman introducing songs he's never heard of. Kind of like the early days at CFNY.
Posted by Humble on December 4, 2007 @ 09:44|Permalink
Sad news about an old friend.
Some of you are already aware that a very nice guy named Bain Arnold died suddenly last Friday night from some bizarre allergic reaction.
He was a guy I got to know by hosting golf tournaments at Angus Glen and then later he had me host the first of several Golf-A-Paloozas that he organized featuring Canadian rock bands and golfers raising money for Charity.
I hadn't seen him for a while but when Mojo first went on the air he and I and Ripken would play the odd round on a Sunday morning before the course opened for tournament play. He was fun to be around and was good to me and Rick no matter how many times Ripken bothered him for free rounds.
Bain was a great guy who died way too young. He leaves behind a wife and 6 month old baby.
There are a lot of people in the golf business, not to mention the Radio/TV and corporate world who were shocked by the news.
He was was easy to hang with and loved by his staff and friends.
It's sad and a shame and he will be missed.
Visitation is at the Nixon Garland Funeral home at 166 Markham rd. (Hwy 48) at 2-4 and at 7-9 Wednesday.
Posted by Humble on December 4, 2007 @ 09:14|Permalink
Couple of quick things for a friday.
I've gotten quite a few e-mails about Freddyp's site being down. Don't know what is going on but this guy is on the case and I'm sure things will be solved soon.
Hey Leafs way not to suck last night.
Congrats Leaf Fans on a nice victory. The first in nearly 2 weeks.
These days a Leaf win is like finding change underneath your couch cushions. Unexpected, delightful and rare and you're never sure when it'll happen again.
I'm going to be on CBC Radio in Regina this afternoon doing some promo for The CBC national Radio show The Debaters.
It's so weird to me that in the past 13 months I've done more Radio, print and live performances in Saskatchewan than in all the previous 25 years combined.
My Dad would have loved all of this stuff and I guess he's getting a kick out of it somewhere.
The Debaters line-up is pretty cool.
Judy Croon, Neil Crone and Manoj Sood from Little Mosque, Al Rae, Dan Redican, Simon Rakoff, Carrie Gaetz (funny chick I worked with last night.) and Big Daddy Tazz from Winnipeg who is like some Prairie stand-up legend.
Also my Brother Steve will be there to hang-out and see what it looks like when someone from CBC actually hires me.
Basically it's like 20 minutes of work surrounded by 2 days of drinking and freezing our asses off.
One of the producers said, "You'd better dress warmly it's nearly minus 35!"
I said it wouldn't matter cause I'm sure it's not minus 35 in the cab, the Hotel and the Studio. I don't see myself going for any long, leisurely walks on the frozen tundra.
Have a great couple of days and I'll try and check back in when I return.
Posted by Humble on November 30, 2007 @ 12:24|Permalink
In my House. The quick and dirty edition.
By quick and dirty I'm not talking about my sex life. I would like to but Randella reads this once in a while and she wouldn't be amused. Not that she's all that amused when she does read it.
I've got a script to revise for one of my little TV projects so I can't play much bloggy blog today. Sorry.
I have tried to toss out some extra drivel this week hoping that you drivel-fans will be satiated.
Item #1.
I am doing some more stand-up tonight at Absolute Comedy. I am a little sick and a bit hung over but I'm eager to try out some new stuff and a couple of things I'll be doing on CBC's The Debaters. (It's a show that features comics doing a mock debate. Just an excuse to fling jokes back and forth.)
I'll try and post one of the jokes tomorrow. In the meantime here's an report on my act from an actual audience member. Hey Howard,
Funny set at Absolute Comedy on Friday. I was the guy (Mike) in the front row who's birthday it was. I know you're a good friend of Mike Boon's, and he's a teammate of mine on our softball team. So it was good to see you do so well.
Thanks.
Mike Kic
Item #2.
I've been working a couple days this week at my new gig at ACME pictures. No I didn't make that up. I'm learning to direct and produce corporate video, commercials and some broadcast TV stuff. I've done one job already and now I've just started a second one.
Going to work is fun. The driving to work sucks ass.
Item #3.
I went to that Gary Slaight thing last night and ran into almost every dude I ever worked for. JJ, Blair, Stu, Gary R, Jeff V, Bob H, Rob B and so on. Lots of Radio people although only one other "on air" person, Maureen Holloway. She's nice and smells good.
It was quite the evening with lots of food and booze and making fun of Gary. He was genuinely touched by some of the remarks. The highlight had to be when Jim Cuddy and Greg Keelor got up and played a few songs (Yes Blue-freakin Rodeo inside a small restaurant.)
They, like a lot of Canadian artists benefited greatly from Gary's support over the years and just wanted to be part of the big tribute and say thanks.
Yes I was a bit drunk but still I got chills when the two of them did Lost Together.
Very cool.
Okay that's it. No YouTube or funny pictures or making fun of the Leafs. You'll have to do that for yourself.
Bewell,
hHdotcom.
Posted by Humble on November 29, 2007 @ 09:54|Permalink
A tribute to Gary Slaight. Yes the guy that fired me.
The first time I worked for Gary was 1989 in Montreal, he hired me again in 1991 and then again in 2003. I've no doubt that if he still had Radio stations he'd hire me again.
Oh yeah he also fired me a couple of years ago but I still like him.
He's a smart smart guy, a sharp broadcaster and a unique individual. By unique I also mean very bizarre at times and not everyone digs him.
I always did and firing aside, I have had a pretty good relationship with him for a long time.
Even after he gassed me we continued to have lunch every so often and talk on the phone.
He always has some good advice and insight. Hey, as my buddy Lou says, there's nothing wrong with having a Billionaire return your calls.
Tonight I'm going to an exclusive tribute dinner and when the invitation came I said yes right away.
I figure he could pack the place with just people that he's fired and hired back.
Who knows maybe he'll give me a job as his personal pilot.
Or butler. Or butler/pilot/funny-Hebrew guy.
Posted by Humble on November 28, 2007 @ 09:26|Permalink
Steve Martin's new book "Born Standing Up!"
I was 17 in 1977 and Steve Martin was the hottest thing in comedy.
I walked around doing his bits and talking like him all the time. My friend Danny K and I would "get small" and listen to Steve Martin records and howl.
By howl I of course mean laugh like the high chimps we were.
The first time I did stand-up at a real comedy club was Punchlines in Vancouver and I walked on stage with a tennis racket cover on my head.
It was because I wanted to be Steve Martin.
(The tennis racket cover bit has since been retired. Btw I was pretending I was the Pope playing Tennis. Hilarious right?)
Anyway in 1981 Steve Martin stopped doing stand-up and never went back again.
The book Born Standing Up is about his life leading up to and including that amazing time in the late 70's when he was playing arenas and selling millions of albums.
I read it in two days.
If you remember Steve Martin as more than the dad in the Cheaper by the Dozen movies you will love this book.
For those of you who have never heard him do his act have a listen.
Posted by Humble on November 26, 2007 @ 09:26|Permalink
Check out this story and then watch the video.
Randee sent me the link to this cool Blockbuster spot.
The article is from something called "Marketing Daily" ...
Blockbuster Canada has launched a TV spot for the holiday season that features famous lines of dialogue from popular films.
The spot depicts a family’s Christmas dinner. As the camera pans from room to room, characters young and old spout lines from movies such as The Godfather, Forrest Gump and Crocodile Dundee in the context of their ordinary interaction.
I've tried searching the YouTube for the spot but it's not up yet. In the meantime click here, then click on the thing that says Click to play ad, then come back here.
Posted by Humble on November 22, 2007 @ 09:50|Permalink
Go see this with your kiddies. Do it.
Some of you know I'm involved with The Lorraine Kimsa Theatre for Young People.(used to be YPT.)
I'm on the Board of Directors and have enjoyed my time volunteering for the past couple of years.
I just wanted to give you heads up on a play for you and your chiluns aged 4-14.
The Wizard of Oz.
Yes that show.
Your little peeps will love it and I suspect you will too. Check out the site for more info.
It runs through the Xmas holidays.
Posted by Humble on November 22, 2007 @ 09:33|Permalink
Stand up on the weekend. Again.
I'll be working out this weekend again and trying to build more minutes.
Actually I'll be at Absolute Comedy a new club in the old Yuks location at Yonge an Egg Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights.
I'll be just doing a short spot-10 minutes or so- but as I say I'm trying to keep getting some time so that I can work on new stuff.
Years ago when I did this comedy thing full time I could do nearly an hour. The thing is I'm trying to write all new stuff so that I can do some corporate gigs as a comic again.
No I can't do much from my old act...those Reagan jokes just don't seem as fresh anymore.
I'll be working with my old pal Lou Eisen, a comic that I've done many shows with over the years and even spent a few laugh-less months working on the Puppet Show together. (Other people call it Ed's Night Party. To me it will always be "That Not funny Puppet Show!")
I'll let you know if I get anything thrown at me.
Here's a piece that I have been doing for a while and it's working pretty well.
When my wife was pregnant with our first kid, we found out the sex of the baby and one of her friends thought that was horrible.
OY, she said, you'll RUIN THE SURPRISE!
Trust me..when I observe a miniature human life-form crawling out of my wifes yahimba..i’ll be surprised. Believe me I was surprised...and slightly horrified and a bit nauseous.
Ruin the surprise…How big a surprise can their be???it’s either a boy or a girl.
It’s not like, Oh, you've given birth to a Squid! Oh my God that is a surpries.
You've got a beautiful baby squid...congratulations Aqua Dad.
Ha ha, then I do some more pee pee and poo poo jokes and sculk off the stage.
Posted by Humble on November 21, 2007 @ 08:12|Permalink
What the Hell?
What the hell is going on?
At the American Music Awards it was all Idol all the time.
Chris Daughtery, Carrie Underwood, (who is so freaking delicious I would like to let her use me in inappropriate ways.) even stunned Kelly Pickler won something. Amazing and just goes to show you what a boost that show is to whoever wins or competes on it. Sangria excepted.
What the Hell?
The Leafs stole the Argo's win.
That's my theory.
The Leafs beat the Senators- a much superior team- and thus got the "Big Win" that should have gone to the Argos. Then come Sunday when the Boatmen face the Blue Bombers, they come up sucking (which was supposed to be the Leafs vs Sens scenario) and now will just be watching the Grey Cup.
Thanks Leafs, way to go and steal more moments of joy from a deserving town.
What the Hell?
Hey next time let's try and schedule more crap on a Sunday in the big city.
Argos/Raptors/Santa Parade. Why not throw in Carabana and the CNE?
When the plans are being made somebody has to be mindful that the Jolly fat guy comes to town the 3rd Sunday in November and that's in stone.
Yes I know the Argos don't know if they're going to make the playoffs or what, but the Raptors don't have to play that day.
Apparently another accident on the DVP ground things to a halt and along with all of the above created another Perfect Storm of gridlock. It's a wonder we don't have more people on horseback. It'd be faster and cause less sh*t!
What the Hell?
Hey Hhdotcom what's with all the new drivel? Well I'm working at home today and Tuesday so I thought I'd fire a bunch of junk your way just in case the drivel dries up again later in the week.
Enjoy.
Posted by Humble on November 19, 2007 @ 09:33|Permalink
In my House-The Anniversary Edition.
Randee and I had our 18th wedding anniversary yesterday. Yes 18 years. We were married when we were teenagers. Okay, maybe slightly older.
We went out for dinner Saturday night and had a great time. Lot's of laugh and romantic canoodling including some off-color behavior by my bride in a dance club that I just know she'd be pissed if I told you. So I won't.
That's how long I've been married. I really don't want to do anything to upset my wife's equilibrium-if she's happy then I'm happy.
I'm like a lot of guys who've been "in-country" this long. I've learned that all the day to day operations are out of my hands and that I really only need to be part of the big-picture strategic planning. In other words I don't care if we buy organic or not but my wife does so I do too.
But I really don't.
Is there anything more futile than 2 married men trying to make plans to get together.
"Should we try and meet for dinner?"
"Sure, but I'll have to check with my wife first."
"Me too. Why don't we have them call and they can work it out!"
Our girls gave us some nice cards. Actually Charlie gave us a card, Spencer put on a "Spoken Word" performance and wrote me a song. Very strange, those children. Must come from their mothers side.
Charlie's card began....."It's been a long 18 years but let's be serious, it was worth it..." and ended...."I love you people!"
Very sweet. Definitely like their mom.
Yesterday we spent the afternoon with my Godson Colton Lee Duran for his birthday. What a fine and special kid who is now 5 freaking years old!
How the hell did that happen? That means I must be nearly 60 and his father Dan is pushing a 100.
Posted by Humble on November 19, 2007 @ 08:58|Permalink
Mobile Phone to monitor your Spending...
This a story bout a cell phone that tracks your spending. How bout a cell phone that tracks your cell-use and then shuts down when you go over your limit.
Here's part of the story.... Users enter their target maximum weekly spend, which can be broken down into categories such as lunch, clothes and alcohol.
Any money spent is then entered by category and the Spendometer sends a text message alert if the user goes over their spending limits.
Malcolm Hurlston, chairman of the charity Credit Action, said: "By making money management easy with mobile phones, we hope to help millions to keep better control of their money."
Posted by Humble on November 19, 2007 @ 08:37|Permalink
One of my Fav Stories of 07.
JackAss Guy lights his doink on fire!
I was going over some notes recently and came across something I heard this on the news earlier this year.
This guy trying to be like the JackAss movie-dudes lights his private area on fire.
Wow. Way to go. Oh you're a JackAss alright-mission accomplished.
Love the newscaster....."Apparently they young man performed the stunt while he was intoxicated!"
Isn't that obvious? I mean isn't being hammered implicit in the act of lighting one's own junk on fire?
I just want to know...What exactly are you drinking and how much, that setting your clank on fire seems like a good idea? What is the magical booze to blazing sack formula?
"I'm hammered, and Curious! I wonder what would happen if I poured gas on my nuts and lit them on fire?"
Ouch.
Posted by Humble on November 14, 2007 @ 08:36|Permalink
No Drivel Toay. I repeat No Drivel.
Hi.
I have to be downtown all day and then for supper too.
So the drivel production will be delayed by at least 24 hours.
Sorry.
I can say that Team Gold is still undefeated. I will have full game stats and notes Wednesday.
I can also mention I'll be appearing at the Laugh Resort Friday night.
My Champagne Anniversary is coming up too and I'll explain what that is.
I just found out myself.
In the meantime enjoy this Drivel-Free Day.
Bewell.
h
Posted by Humble on November 13, 2007 @ 08:28|Permalink
Me and You and a Blog named Boon...
(Boon with Jim Peplinski, Nick Kypreos and Stew Gavin in the Alumni lounge.)
The Boon and I went to the Leaf game Saturday night, courtesy of my pal Stew Gavin.
It was quite the entertaining affair.
Pre-game skate brawl almost breaks out, the hall of fame ceremonies, then a fairly decent game and then the shoot-out overtime loss then a scrap in our section among some of the patrons.
Cool. Just a few questions.
Hey Leaf Talk, why not start the guy who got the shut-out the night before.
Hey Leaf Talk, what kind of cancer only requires a pill a day to remedy?
Hey Leaf Talk, how come your voice is so fake and crappy?
It was fun hanging out at Maple Sucks game with an actual fan who not has drank the kool-aid but is sweater-wearing member of the cult. For Mikes report go here.
Posted by Humble on November 12, 2007 @ 08:27|Permalink
A bunch of different junk then I'm downtown again.
I was going to put up a thing about how Avril Lavigne was fighting back against this internet gossip-douche Perez Hilton but then I just went and looked at it and it's crap.
Sorry for anyone who saw the posting and wasted their time by visiting the hyper-links.
My time in the morning now is limited and I thought I'd blog about it and it might be interesting.
In my haste (yes, haste) I didn't thoroughly check it out. Then I did and I decided it was all crap and I wouldn't bother you with it.
Okay now let's move on.
Apparently the Star had some issues after our Prime Minister's chat with Dalton yesterday. Fine but the headline? PM to Cities: Drop Dead! Oh come on kids try and tone your biases down just a tad.
Yeah that's the message the Evil Harper was sending.
Here's what he was probably thinking. "Dang this Dalton guy is really a dolt. I wonder how often he had his ass-kicked in school"
Finally good news for Leaf fans. Boon and me are going to the Hall of Fame game Saturday night, Maple Sucks vs The Rangers.
Why is this good news?
For the past several years every time I go to a game the Leafs win. Seriously.
I think they do it just to annoy me.
Hey yall, I've got to go downtown...again.
Have a great weekend and I'll see you back here Monday.
H
Posted by Humble on November 9, 2007 @ 07:28|Permalink
Charlie's last Halloween. Dang it.
Well that's that.
This was the transition year for me and my former "Baby."
I just know that's all.
For the first time she invited a friend (Natalie) along and a Boy! Great. Nice kid, told him I was a spy with a license for violence.
He told me he was Polish and didn't need a jacket. (True story, still don't know what he meant.)
So me, Charlie, her friend, the Polish Boy and Spencer went out.
After about 30 minutes Charlie said, "This isn't as fun as it used to be." Ouch.
I remember when she thought it was the funnest. I remember carrying her from house to house in a bear costume.
After about 45 minutes she asked if she and her buds could go on their own. And that was it.
Me and the 9 year-old went across the street and they disappeared into the night.
The transition was complete.
Next year it'll just be me and Spenny and Charlie will be one of those "big kids" that show up at your door after the little ones have turned in.
I knew this day was coming but now that it's here I wish it was still a few years away.
My favorite parent/kid quote goes something like..."The days are long but the years are short.."
And getting shorter.
Posted by Humble on November 1, 2007 @ 07:10|Permalink
Howard the LapTop Hunter!
I've been pining over this for some time.
I want a Mac.
I've mentioned this before and now I'm getting closer...again.
Yes I've had this discussion previously and now I'm about to pull the trigger on a purchase.
Anybody have a Mac Laptop and anyone know anything about them?
I know I like them and they're pretty.
I know they are cheaper in the States (Big surprise) by about 250 bucks and I know the Macbook Pro is too much for me.
So the question which one to get.
I've been on the phone with a good dude named Neal who is trying to help me out but it's all 80 GB or 160 GB and accessories.
But if you actually own one let me know if it's any good.
In the meantime I'll keep looking but it's something I really want but I'm only marginally sure I need.
Posted by Humble on October 30, 2007 @ 09:23|Permalink
Ha Ha That's Funny.
(Inconceivable! You bested my Giant so you must be strong...)
DEER MEAT A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner.
Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat
it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess.
The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they
begged their dad for the clue.
Well, he said, 'It's what mommy calls me sometimes'.
The little girl screams to her brother
'Don't eat it, it's an asshole..
Posted by Humble on October 30, 2007 @ 08:27|Permalink
Sorry the Drivel production has been delayed due to some technical junk...
My sites been down all day. Sorry.
I just got to post something that I wrote this morning and now I have to go coach Team Gold to another non-loss.
So far we are 3-0-1 and one tko.
(Read all about last weeks tussle here.)
Later we're going to carve pumpkins and roast seeds. Halloween fun.
I finally saw Death Proof. That joint Rocks. Quentin Taratino is the man and then there's everyone else.
I also saw Knocked Up. Laughed my N*ts off. Yes I did. If you see them please put them in an envelope and drop them in the mail.
Gotta run, thanks for the nice comments on my Dad entry recap.
Much appreciated.
h
Posted by Humble on October 29, 2007 @ 16:25|Permalink
One year, one day ago.
Some of you know my Dad, Lou Glassman, died last year. October 27, 2006 to be exact.
I wanted to look back at some of the stuff I wrote around that time and I thought you might like to peruse it again as well.
I miss my Father very much and last night I raised a glass to him with a Martini, one of his favorite drinks.
When I read some of the entries it brought me back to that painful time and in way helped remind me of what I lost and how time is starting to make it hurt less.
I was blogging from this nice cafe on Main street and I was trying to keep things going.
I'm in Moose Jaw. Some of you may know that this is where I'm from. Some of you may already have guessed that I'm here on less than happy circumstances. My father, Lou has a serious health issue, and my brothers and I are here to give him some comfort. It hasn't been an easy time for my family. It's pretty sad and scary and weird. But mostly it's sad.
I haven't spent much time here over the years so it's kind of strange getting around town and living at the house I was born in. I don't have much time to blog as I spend most of the day at the hospital. My dad has moments of lucidity and he has a wicked good sense of humour.
The other day we were in Regina to see a specialist and we were being attended to by a couple of cute, very sweet nurses.
I said to him, "These nurses here in Regina are really cute!"
He comes back with, "Yeah the nurses are nice, but their football team still sucks!"
Funny that the patient is the one who seems to be breaking the tension.
I wrote this a couple of days before he died and the last day he was awake before he became comatose.
Many of you know I'm in Moose Jaw visiting my dad. He had a great day yesterday, I got him out of his bed and outside in the sun. Amazing that as sick as he is, all he really wants to do is smoke! Anyway, thanks to everybody who has left such nice comments. We all know that we're going to have to go through this...many of you already have, and now it's my turn.
We're not sure what's going on in terms of his prognosis, but it's not good and it's day to day.
So that's all I know.
I was supposed to go back to Toronto for a couple of appearances and I stopped by the hospital on the way to the airport with my Brothers and the nurses to me it looked very bad. They said if I was leaving I'd best say my goodbyes. I wasn't ready to do that so I canceled my trip back East.
My dad isn't doing too well so I decided to stay with him in Moose Jaw. I won't be at the Womens show tonight, but my book will be. My publishing partner Jason will have 100 books to give away at the main stage at 5:30. After those are gone he'll be taking orders.
I'm sorry I can't be there but If some of you were making plans because of me, I'd like to offer you a free book instead. Believe me it's less annoying and funnier! I don't know when I'm coming back to Toronto but I'll try and update you on things here in the Jaw when I can.
Oh yeah I won't be on the CH TV thing tonight either. Take care and I'll check back with you all soon.
Finally, Friday October 27. Randee came to Moose Jaw and she and I sat with Lou for a bit before all of us went out for dinner. He died while we were away cause that's the type of man he was.
I wrote this the next day.
I'll make this brief because it hurts too much to type.
My dad died last night around 8:30 pm Moose Jaw time.
After spending all day surrounded by his sons, their wives and some grand-kids he finally passed away in the one hour when we were all out of the room. He was like that. He didn't like to be fussed over and when he was finally alone he slipped peacefully away.
He would have been 84 in December.
I have been choked up gusting to in-tears off and on for the last few days but over all I'm relieved.
I got to spend a few great days with him and my brothers, and now I'm doing what all sons and daughters do, I'm grieving and taking care of his business.
Thanks for your thougths and comments.
I'm not coming back to Toronto for another week but I'll be in touch here whenever I can.
This last piece was from my Dad's birthday, December 5.
I wrote:
My Dad died 39 days ago. October 27th. 5 weeks, 4 days shy of his 84th birthday.
I thought of this last night during my normal 2 hour toss and turn session between 3-5am. You know, it's not bad when you think of it in the abstract. I mean nearly 84 fairly healthy years and then a quick passing is pretty good when you think of it applied to someone else, someone you don't know, someone who's not your father.
It would have been Lou's 84th birthday today and I thought for the first time since this all began I'd show you a picture of him.
Nearly 84 years is pretty good when you think of it, except when it comes to someone who was your Dad, someone you miss very badly every day.
Happy Birthday Lou!
Posted by Humble on October 28, 2007 @ 01:48|Permalink
Some good, some weird and My Movie!
I got this note about a little girl from Hamilton who can't get back in the country. I don't normally put this stuff up but this won't take much of your time. Have a look and do what you think you should. LittleGirlThing
My pal Toni (aka Soccer Mom-looking good at the ToFC game I might add!) sent me this link called "Cubicle Freak Out!" Fun, entertaining and weird. You will enjoy hours of I-should-be-working time playing this.
CubicleFreakOut!!!
And finally, Pam sent me a link to the movie Repo The Genetic Opera which I played a very minor role in earlier this week.
Have a look at this strange looking little film. It's definitely going to be different. Very ghoulish and Halloweenie.(I guess that's why I'm not a movie critic.)
Have a look, courtesy of Pam.
Holy Crap!
Posted by Humble on October 26, 2007 @ 08:37|Permalink
More Controversy? Well sort of...
Early this week I was playing golf with my buddy Jeff Lumby and my best half-Mexican Carlos Benevides from the Giant Afternoon Radio Show on Dave Fm and Lumby got hit in the nuts by a golf ball. Twice.
I've never seen such a thing. The group behind seemed oblivious to waiting for us to clear the green and just hammered Lumby in the nut-sack on two separate occasions.
Very dangerous and highly amusing. Read all about it here.
And don't forget to listen to Carlos on the Mammoth Later Afternoon-Early evening Wireless Broadcast. Do it, especially you South Americans!
Posted by Humble on October 26, 2007 @ 08:34|Permalink
Meetings, Meetings, Meetings. Repeat.
The next few days Hhdotcom may be a bit lean. I am downtown every day and I may not have time to fully serve you peeps the way I like to. The way you deserve to be served. The type of service that says, "I care about you and I'm not just doing this blog until I get a real job!"
A few highlights.
I'll finally be sitting down with one of the great icons of Canook media. I can't tell you his name but it rhymes with Toeziz Finer. He has agreed to meet with me and I can't wait. I dig this guy and I'd love to work with/for/around him.
I'd fetch his coffee if it meant I could soak up some of the savvy dripping from his jam-packed cranium.
I have 3 LKTYP meetings with prospective grown-up board of directors. These are people who do real things for a living and I'm to meet with them to see if they'd like to serve our fine Theatre for Young People.
I hope they don't ask me what I do for work.
Them: So Mr. Board President, and what do you do?
Me: Uh, I have a blog that's read by nearly 37 people a day.
Them: Impressive.
Also this week I'll be meeting with the most powerful TV Producer in Canada. I can't tell you who he is but he produces a little show that rhymes with Fanadian Ridol.
Anyway he and I are going to be working on a show that I created and I'll tell you it's pretty danged exciting.
I would also love to work for/with/around this dude too. Many fine things are stirring around his giant TV brain and I'd make him lunch every day if he'd just let me catch the odd Giant Brain Dripping.
We'll see.
Posted by Humble on October 24, 2007 @ 08:27|Permalink
Repo the Genetic Opera. A Movie.
So I spent the day with John Gallagher on the set of this cool futuristic movie staring Paul Sorvino, (The boss from GoodFellas) and Paris Hilton.(Smoking Hot society chick.)
Met them both.
Well sort of.
Met and shook Paul Sorvino's hand, had a little small talk in the make-up room and it was cool.
As for Paris.
She was in the room while we were getting made up but I honestly didn't know it was her until about 5 minutes before she got up and left.
It was very odd. The room was full of people and I was getting stuff sprayed onto my face and I looked over and noticed this pretty little thing wearing a bathrobe.
I whispered to the make-up lady..."Is that uh, you know, Paris Hilton?"
"Yup" She says.
And that was it. A few minutes later Paris got up, I tried to say something clever, but I just sort of half-smiled and she was gone.
Oh well, our plans to run off together will just have to wait. For now.
Anyway the movie seemed pretty cool.
Here's the synopsis...A worldwide epidemic encourages a biotech company to launch an organ-financing program similar in nature to a standard car loan.
Apparently if you can't pay the loans your organs get re-possessed or something like.
It was all futuristic and goth-looking and I was wearing a tux and hanging with Spike G so it was a fine day all around.
The director is the guy that did Saw 2, 3, and 4 and he seemed like a good dude too.
I'll let you know when this thing gets released so you can see how bizarre I can really look.
Posted by Humble on October 24, 2007 @ 08:23|Permalink
Stand up on the weekend.
I did two nights of stand up with Glen Foster this weekend at the Oakville Center and it was great.
I love working with Glen and I got to see my pal Tony Krolo for the first time in years.
It was weird.
When I did comedy full time nearly 20 years ago I worked with these two a lot...when we were in our twenties. Now, here we were, middle-aged men working together again.Or as Glen says "I hope we're middle-aged, my math could be off!"
I seemed to do well. I hosted and did about 20 minutes both night and I got some good laughs. I haven't done much stand up lately so I had to rehearse in my basement all week just to get the rhythm down. I know that sounds odd, but even though I wrote the junk a comic has to say the stuff out loud in order to perfect the timing.
It seemed to work. Plus I'm always proud of the fact that it's a skill that very few other Radio guys have.
I got this nice note.
Great job last night! Honestly, I did not know that you were hosting the show. Friends of mine got the tickets for us when they went on sale a while back.
You did an excellent job! You noted that you hoped you would not throw up on yourself...too bad someone else did. Why does that happen in rooms filled with people? Why can't it happen outside in the open.
Thanks for the laughs~
Colleen.
She's referring to the fact that just before the 2nd half started some dude threw up in the audience. I was like "Thank you Gods of Comedy for this unexpected gift!"
Not sure when I'll be doing it again but I'll let you know.
Posted by Humble on October 22, 2007 @ 08:12|Permalink
Charlie's list.
I now have to rely on my 12 soon-to-be 13 year-old to keep in the loop musically. Well her and Mike Boon.( Mike put up a cool Top 100 Canook tunes list recently..check it out here.)
I asked Charlie to send me a few of her current IPod favs so I could load them up on my new Nano.
Here's what she sent me.
Move On-Jet
Ayo Technologie- 50cent ft. emiminem
Hide and Seek- Imogen Heap
Speeding Cars-Imogen Heap
Kiss Kiss-Chris Brown ft. T-Pain
Please Dont Stop The Music-Rihanna
I dug them all but the one I really got into is this Imogen Heap chick. She is unbelievably talented and hot and British.(I think?) Anyway, she is truly unique as you'll see in this YouTube clip.
Check this out. It's called Hide and Seek and it's the hit.
Watch this if you have time its just freaking amazing.
Posted by Humble on October 22, 2007 @ 07:46|Permalink
Me in Tux and Jello Gloves!
Hey Hhdotcom, do you have any shots of you in your Tuxedo from the night you hosted Fact or Fiction at the ROM with Mary Jo Eustice!
Yes I do. Well without Mary Jo.
I got ready on Wednesday night and thought I'd better take some shots. I took a few with my kids but I'm no longer allowed to show pictures of them on my site due to security protocols put in place by a higher authority.(Mrs Hhdotcom.)
Anyway here's me in Tux at Home.
Pretty Spiffy eh?
Hey Hhdotcom do you have any pictures of the Jello gloves you and Spencer (no photo available) made for her to take to her friends Halloween party?
As a matter of fact I do.
Last night Spenny and I poured Jello into 2 rubber gloves to make Jello hands. It was all her idea and I have to admit it turned out pretty cool.
Check it. Jello Gloves on Counter.
I'm not really at liberty to say why we have a supply of rubber gloves, but some of you may recall I sometimes think I'm a Doctor. I'm not but it's fun to pretend. Okay I've said enough.
Posted by Humble on October 19, 2007 @ 10:11|Permalink
Colbert for President, The ROM thing and Tiger.
I think Steve Colbert may be the funniest non-Hebe around. Yes even you white-people can spit out the odd fine yuckster and Little Stevie Colbert is one of them.
He's running for President and why not. He's no less qualified than the stumble-bum they've got now and at least he means to be funny.
Here's Colbert making the announcement.
SORRY THE THING IS DOWN DUE TO SOME "COPYRIGHT" BS!
Jason P sent me this blurb on Tiger juice. Pepsico's (PEP) Gatorade Co. will launch a drink named for golf star Tiger Woods, Gatorade Tiger, in March, with additional products added to the line in the future.
Financial terms of the sponsorship deal weren't disclosed.
Sales of Gatorade, PepsiCo's second-best-selling brand globally, have been choppy in recent quarters as the sports drink faces a tough competitive environment. PepsiCo executives recently said they expect several new products, including a low-calorie version of Gatorade called G2, to help fuel growth of their noncarbonated beverages.
Cool. I read this myself yesterday and the terms they were throwing around were 100 million over 5 years. My question. Would Tiger even notice that money or would that be just some side cash for Mrs. Tiger to take the baby shopping.
Finally the ROM thing went very nicely last night. I hung with the extremely beautiful Mary Jo Eustice and met some other hot rich babes as well. Dang guys with money get some nice looking gals. How'd I luck out.(Obligatory wife-suck up after talking about other hot women.)
At the end of the night I had the pleasure of meeting the legendary Dave Marsden. Yeah the radio guy that put CFNY on the map. I've been in town nearly 20 years and last night was the first time I'd met him. A great guy and quite the character.
I've heard so much about him that I felt I knew him and he lived up to everything I'd been told.
He's currently doing the Iceberg thing and spinning his own tunes Thursdays and Friday nights on The Rock in Oshawa.
Posted by Humble on October 18, 2007 @ 10:19|Permalink
Hhdotcom may be shutting down!
I don't mean to freak you out but I may not have time to do my little bloggage anymore. I've just received word from Mr Bichnga Tran that I'm about to get 1.3 million dollars. This will of course be more than enough money to open that Pita Pocket franchise I've been looking at so I'll be too busy making yummy Pitas to write every day.
I love the Pita Pocket, the Pitas are fresh and healthy and some even have hummous.
Who can argue with that?
I'll work there with my whole family and maybe one day retire and let my kids take over.
All I have to do is send in some undisclosed amount of money to the UniAir annual lottery program and my Pita dreams will soon be coming true.
Thank you Bichnga Tran.
From:The desk of the Ceo
UniAiR annual lottery program
Winning number:0610060645200385
Serial net batch number:187561691619
Attn:
Congratulations,you have been selected as one of the lucky winners in our annual end of year lottery program through our internet balloting email extracting and screening machine,your application was applied and processed by our internet balloting email extracting and screening machine which randomly extracts and screens millions of email adresses around the world.
This lottery program is held annually as part of UniAiR end of year lottery promotions.You are the 2nd among our 5 lucky winners and you have therefore been awarded a lump sum payout of USD1,003,198.5{One million,three thousand one hundred and ninety-eight U.S dollars,5 cent}
Your winning number is:0610060645200385 and your serial net batch number is:187561691619.Please note that there were no ticket sellouts in our lottery program,all our past and present winners were selected randomly through the internet balloting email extracting and screening machine.
In this regards you are adviced to forward the following requirements urgently to mr moses by email scanning attachments for faster processing,to enable us begin the processing of your winning documents and money transfer:
(1.)Write in full,your telephone number,postal and residential adress.
(2.)Scanned copy of your recent passport photograph.
(3.)Scanned copy of the main information page of your national passport or I.d card or driving licence.
(4.)Acceptance fee:This fee should be payed through western union money transfer adressed to the second secretary of UniAiR.
Providing the above requirements will assure you your winning certificate and prize money bank cheque which we shall post to you through express courier service.
Important Notice:
The prize money will be remmited to you in full as soon as we receive all the requirements listed above.Please inform mr moses the means you which to receive your prize money,we prefer sending our winners bank cheques by courier service but we can also send you the prize money by bank transfer or western union money transfer if you wish.
We shall be anticipating your reply soon.
Thanks
Mr Bichnga Tran
Posted by Humble on October 18, 2007 @ 09:56|Permalink
The Roof, the Goof and the Proof.
The heading refers to my roof, I'm the goof and I thought adding "the proof" made it sound cool.
As I write this there are about 15 dudes on my roof stripping shingles and banging in nails. It's really quite something to see.
I got 5 different quotes and this company was best by far. 3 reasons.
1)Best price for the quality of shingle.(Timberline 40 year!)
2)Came highly recommended by my buddy Geoff H.
3)Work done in one freaking day. Not even. They got here at 9 and are scheduled to be done by 3.
How good is that?
I really did my homework and I'm happy to recommend Complete Roofing. The guy Pierre has been great to deal with and the price was very fair. Go to CompleteRoofing.ca.
All the companies I dealt with except one were very good. One guy showed up for our appointment and I just happened to be outside my front door when he arrived in his truck.
He never got out of the truck and actually yelled his quote to me from inside the vehicle.
Nice salesmanship.
"I do your house for 63 hundred," he yells at me.
"How do you know that without measuring?" I respond.
"I do a lot of houses in this neighborhood." hey shouts back at me.
I walk back in the house thinking,"Maybe you do but not mine!"
Hey if you want the business at least make it look like your trying.
Before I went inside I asked him for a card. He waved me over to his truck and handed me one through the window. Uh okay.
Anything else I can do for you, coffee, drink of water a jaunty F-away and be gone?
Posted by Humble on October 17, 2007 @ 10:07|Permalink
The Glassman Brothers.
This hardly used to happen. (From left to right) David, Steven and me all together. I'd see Steve every so often when he was in town working on CBC shows that no matter how diverse share a lack of "me" in common.
David I would see a bit less cause his work didn't take him out East.
We got together occasionally. I took the family to Calgary a couple of years ago and prior to that, the three of us organized my Fathers 80th birthday. That was it. The three of us weren't in the same space very much.
Till the last year of course.
Starting last October The G-Bros were together quite a bit because of my Dad's illness, death, funeral, house-dispersal and now unveiling.
I looked at this picture and I wondered when the next time we might be able to take another.
A happy occasion I hope.
Posted by Humble on October 17, 2007 @ 09:23|Permalink
The Old Man and his Nano.
I wrote last week about my new IPod Nano.
I love the Nano. It is my besty.
I've been loading it up with some of my favorite tunes and I thought you might find it interesting to hear what I'm listening to these days.
I find I'm all over the place with the type of stuff I put on
the little magical wonder. I just start thinking about songs I like and those I
haven't hear in a long time. A lot of nostalgia from a life spent introducing tunes.
Some hits, some obscure bits and some of my personal heroes. Tom Waits, Donald Fagen,
Randy Newman etc.
Of course all down-loads are perfectly legal. Except the ones that aren't.
In no particular order...
Cranberries-Linger/Zombie.
U2-Elevation.
T.Pain featuring Akon-Bartender.(Randee's suggestion. I dig it.)
Sentimental Lady-Bob Welch.(SuperStar of the 70's!)
Paul Simon-Still Crazy after all these years.
Steely Dan-ShowBiz Kids.
Joe Jackson-It's different for girls.
Rem-Man on the Moon.
Marvin Gaye-Mercy Mercy Me.
Lyle Lovitt-If I had a boat.
That's just a sample plus I just loaded up the entire Across The Universe soundtrack that I bogarted from my brother. His daughter Zoe burned it for him and now I have it. Awesome. Thanks Zoe.
(As I write this Justin Timberlake's Love Stone/I think she knows just started. I like that tune too.
My daughters think he's hot. They think I'm weird. I'll bet hots better than weird.)
Posted by Humble on October 15, 2007 @ 10:40|Permalink
Lou G Unveiled.
We came, we saw, we unveiled.
My bros and me spent the weekend in Winnipeg for my Father's unveiling. For the one or two Hhdotcom peeps who wouldn't know, my Dad died last October 27th and we Hebrews have a ceremony to unveil the grave marker at a later date.
That was this past weekend.
I didn't know what to expect but it was a nice/sad/bitter-sweet event.
The Rabbi was perfect and very Rabbi-like and it was a bright, warm October day in the Peg which was nice for the assortment of elder Aunts, Uncles and cousins.
It was nowhere near as sad and emotional as the Funeral and I was glad to have come full circle in the space of a year. I still hurt and miss my Dad very much but not in the crushing way it felt a year ago.
My bro Steve was going to say something and then declined but he told me prior that he wanted to mention that Lou was still with us.
I agree.
The Rabbi talked about how people are immortal because of other peoples memories of them.
It's how I feel about my Dad.
I know I'll never forget him and that he will live on through my memories of him.
The only thing that choked me up at the grave-site was seeing my Dad's stone next to my Mothers. Once again the realization that I am now parent-less and small and I'd best start thinking about growing up soon!
Later we had an after un-veiling thing complete with little finger sang-wiches and the best coleslaw I've ever tasted. People love to eat when we're sad. I'm telling you this coleslaw picked up my spirits.
As a great finale to the day my MOB(Much Older Brothers) and I watched/napped the Saskatchewan Roughriders eat Hamiltons lunch in an afternoon CFL tilt.(Cool sports lingo!)
Lou would have loved it.
Posted by Humble on October 15, 2007 @ 09:04|Permalink
Not much time today for Bloggage.
I have 3 different meetings today so I won't be blogging up a storm, sorry.
A couple of quick things.
Yes the Liberals won and immediately kept a promise for a Family Day in February.
Dalton must have said, "Oh so thats what that feels like, cool!"
John Tory is getting an ass-kicking from the morons in his party to take the blame for the PC's loss and step down.
Yes it was his fault, no he shouldn't step down. John's a decent guy and the Tory's would be stupid to replace him with a more right-wing leader.
Saw 30 Rock again last night. By far my favorite network show.
Other stuff I like, The Office, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Weeds, (it's back on Showcase), Prison Break and Iron Chef America. Also Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares-no one swears better than this English blokey.
I got an Ipod Nano-Video a couple of weeks ago and now I spend a good bit of my time loading it up with songs. Legally of course. (Well mostly. Okay, some.)
Anyway it's a fun toy and I've been figuring it out quite easily. I have a bunch of my fav songs, video's (Spencer's fav-Fergie, but I like her too.) and pictures.
Both of my daughters have Ipods but this is my first. One of the ways that let's them know how old I am is occasionally I'll refer to their devices as Walkmans. As in "Honey who's Walkman is charging?"
I don't mean to it just comes out. And makes me sound about a hundred.
Finally this weekend my brothers and I are going to Winnipeg for my Father's unveiling.(Ask a Jewish friend.)
It's been almost a year since my Dad died and it seems alternately like a minute/eternity ago.
The past few weeks have brought the realization that this will be the last time I'll be able to think, "a year ago this day/week etc my Father was still alive."
Weird huh? I guess it's pretty common.
Anyway this is the final piece of the process and then it's just lingering grief and memories.
It's been a long, strange, sad, year.
I'll let you know how I do when I get back on Monday.
Have a great weekend.
Bewell.
h
Posted by Humble on October 12, 2007 @ 08:35|Permalink
LIberals are back and things are going to be GREAT!
"I love you Dalton."
"I love you too Ontario, thanks for making me your Master for the next 4 years."
Well that's perfect. MCG is the man, the Tories are the Leafs and the NDP just keeps on
being the NDP.
Dalton McGuinty won a record second Liberal mandate (first in 70 years) and John Tory never got to work the Premier over on his actual record in government.
A free ride is what the LIberals got and I hope we all learn a lesson from this. One issue can't hijack the whole election or all the other issues get buried.
Faith-based school funding should get a big hug from Mr. McGuinty and his pals cause they owe their victory to it.
Mr. Tory should fire whoever said, "Hey why don't we feature Religion as our campaign strategy. People love hearing about that!"
In the end we all get the government we deserve. Now most of us will go back to ignoring the whole bunch of nincompoops for the next 3-4 years.
Posted by Humble on October 11, 2007 @ 08:09|Permalink
What is this? It's an "Optical Illusion!" Oh.
I found this on the dagnabbit intranet and it reminded me of those dot pictures. Remember those?
You'd stare into a page of dots and a tractor would appear? I hardly ever saw the tractor or the mother holding a baby or the duck wearing a smoking jacket or whatever.
I think it's because I'm color blind and all I see are dots.
I have to have my Aviation Medical this week which includes a pretty extensive eye exam and they test your level of color competency. Last time I failed that part so badly a Doctor from Transport Canada called to find out how I could be so color blind and still see the Vasi/Pappi lights on the side of the runway. (They tell you if your too high or too low. Of course the easy way to tell if your too high is if your watching According to Jim and laughing, but that's another story!)
Anyway I passed the medical but I still can't look at the dot pictures and see anything but dots.
Yes I know you see a naked women holding a jar of pickles but that's because you're special and I'm color blind.
Posted by Humble on October 9, 2007 @ 08:25|Permalink
The Master Cleanse Day 11!
No food for 11 days. Including ThanksGiving. I'm not crapping ya. (I have been crapping but I'd rather not go into it thanks anyway. Very ahem, fluid situation.)
I wrote about this last week and it's been quite a journey for Randee and I. Today it's over.
We don't go rushing back to food though. There's a couple of days of coming down in the form of orange juice, then vegetable soup broth, then the soup including the veggies then by day 3-4 your back on normal food.
How do I feel?
Lighter. Different. Sleeping better-deeper. Not as groggy, logy or worn out.
I know it sounds crazy but we haven't eaten solid food in 11 days and it's been pretty easy.
Sure it's been weird. We were at a huge ThanksGiving dinner at my in-laws and I made the
gravy, carved the turkey then sat down at the table and had a cup of tea. No I wasn't going nuts.
Yes, it was very odd.
Odd that the food didn't affect me or Randee. It wasn't an issue.
Over the past week and a half it seems very puzzling to people that a person can go without food but the #1 question surrounds coffee!
"I could never give up coffee," is something I must have heard a hundred times.
I hear ya, but really it was simple. I had a slight headache day 2 and then no problem.
I will be trying not to go back to coffee right away and I'm going to start watching what I eat a bit more. Maybe I won't have 2 giant glasses of red wine with supper every night and oh I don't know, maybe I'll stop ordering Poutine at the movies for a while. (Dang the French, why did they invent this palate pleaser and why does it have to be so freaking good?)
I would recommend this for anyone who is looking for a system re-boot. That's how I feel. It's like
I've cleaned out a few files and organized my desktop. (Believe me some of those file weren't pretty!)
In case your interested I lost nearly 12 pounds.
In case your curious go here.
Posted by Humble on October 9, 2007 @ 08:16|Permalink
No Bloggy but Good Wishes my Friends.
Still running around today as well. Normal drivel delivery should resume next week.
just wanted to say from the management and staff of Hhdotcom, all the best for this pleasant long holiday weekend. Happy Thanks and it's friend Giving. H
Posted by Humble on October 5, 2007 @ 11:52|Permalink
Warning:Sucky Dad Stuff Alert.
The benefits of not-working.
Days like today are a great reminder to me as to how lucky I am to be in the position I'm in.
(Not working, not having to.)
Not all days are that great. I have periods of worry and stress, sometimes Tiger loses, that type of thing and then I remember that I have time with my kids that I never would have if I'd been getting up at 3am.
Today.
6:30 am: soon to be 13 year crawls into bed for cuddles. (This is same girl who likes me to drop her off a 1/2 block from the school bus due to the massive DEF. Dad Embarrassment Factor) 7:00 am: 9 year old brings dog and crawls into bed for cuddles. 7:45 am: Hang with kids while they get ready for school. 8:10 am: Have long detailed discussion about how much alpha-getty should go into the lunch thermos and how much should be left-over in the bowl to taste. 9 year old has dizzying theories on the subject. Trust me. 8:25 am: Read paper, Spencer plays on computer, dog sleeps. 8:40 am: Take daughter to school bus, discuss school bus speeds and her ability to stay at bus stop with other kids.
8:45 am: Home alone. Counting the minutes till they come back from school again. 10:00am:Write Blog, remember how lucky I am.
Posted by Humble on October 3, 2007 @ 09:56|Permalink
I don't want to talk anymore about Faith-Based school funding but...
Just one thing, as I said yesterday, this is the end of John Tory. There is no way to avoid the flip-flopper image and this is a big flip-flop. No matter how the PC's are trying to spin it and no matter how big a promise-breaker Dalton McGuinty is.
That's all I have to say about it. Honest.
Okay just one more thing. John Tory should be the next Premier of this province but he won't and when he loses I think he'll be done with the whole mess.
He's too cool a dude to be "Leader of the Opposition." That's a chumps job for a guy like John.
It's too bad too.
Guys like John Tory are the best and brightest and typically avoid the crap and scrutiny of politics.
I like him(he sent me a note when I got canned.)
I like his kid.(We've gone flying together.)
I'm betting we won't have JT to kick around much longer if he lose the big gig.
Unfortunately the whole faith-based funding thing will be his swan song.
That's the last thing on it. I promise.
Okay, maybe just a Dalton-promise.
Posted by Humble on October 2, 2007 @ 10:34|Permalink
Some leftover stuff.
In case you missed it, Woody Austin fell in the water on the weekend at the President's Cup.
Unbelievable.
He goes in, gets' soaked and then birdies the next three holes in a row. This will finally replace the Woody highlight reel where he bends a putter over his head.
Here's the head/putter incident.
Finally thanks to Thatmasonkid for sending me this link to Letterman's Paris Hilton interview.
Priceless.
Just read that once again Leno out rates Letterman 5.5 million viewers to 4 and I just don't get it.
Loved Leno as a comic, can't stand him doing the talk-show thing.
Oh well, that'll soon be Conan's job.
Anyway, here's the interview. Yes she's smoking hot but she so freaking stupid she makes the chick from the View seem like Einstein.
Posted by Humble on October 1, 2007 @ 09:09|Permalink
Where does the time go?
I posted something about Jerry Seinfeld earlier and it got me thinking about his stand-up.
I always loved his act and was aware of him when I lived in LA, long before he became the guy from the TV show.
So I found this cool bit. Jerry's first time on the Tonight show with Johnny Carson. Watch how Johnny gives him the A-OK sign at the end.
Now fast forward to Jerry on the show talking about the premier of "The Seinfeld Chronicles!"
(The original name for the program.)
Then I start thinking about Letterman's first time on the show. Letterman loved and idolized Carson and I thought it must have been the coolest thing for him to finally make it to the show.
After that I found Lettermans' first night hosting his first show.
Finally Carson shows up on the CBS show after he had retired to thrill Dave.
So this should answer the question: How do you spend your days?
Posted by Humble on September 27, 2007 @ 09:34|Permalink
Time to brag on my kid a little.
This past year Charlie took a leap from house league soccer to Select and it's been cool to watch.
She is a very fast, athletic, kid who is very coach-able. Well she made this team, got great coaching and improved immensely.
She's a good egg who never fails to make me proud.
Here is story that ran in this weeks Oakville Beaver.
Yes our paper is called "The Beaver," we're way a head of you so just grow up.
(Okay, just one.) Hey you guys in Oakville are so lucky, you get a new Beaver delivered to your door every week! Wow, no wonder it's so expensive to live there.
Happy? Now let's continue with the story from the paper.
The Oakville Chargers under-13 girls' select soccer team went a perfect 3-for-3 in tournament play this season.
Oakville's most recent tournament championship came earlier this month in North Mississauga, competing in a division that also allowed under-14 squads to participate.
The Chargers edged an U14 North Mississauga squad 1-0 in the final, netting the winner in the second half. Cara Hueston paced Oakville with four of the team's ten goals at the tournament, including a golden goal in the Chargers' 1-0 semifinal win over Georgetown's U13 entry.
Oakville went undefeated in the preliminary round, as it did in the two other tournaments it played in. The Chargers won the Oakville Regional Select/All-Star Tournament in August, clinching gold with a 5-2 rout of the Mississauga Falcons in the final, and were also champions at a June tournament in Erin Mills.
Brooke Hicks scored four of the team's 11 goals in Erin Mills. Gaby Guitor had six goals in the Oakville tournament, including three in the final.
Other members of the team are Sarah Eckert, Maeve Garvey, Deanna Spagnuolo, Kate Wickham, Daniela Deschamps, Bronwyn Schweitzer, Alex Schiffner, Isabella Nunez, Sharalynn Missiuna, Natalie LaMarche, Jamison Soeder, Charlie Glassman, Emma Koziey-Kronas, and Laura Whaley.
Assisting the team in several games were Tori Odetunde, Nicole Roblin and Samantha Pereira.
The team is coached jointly by Ed Leyer, Rob Bonadeo and Ralf Soeder.
Posted by Humble on September 27, 2007 @ 09:18|Permalink
Amazing regular guys got talent!
Micker07 sent me this note and they're right. Humble,
Not sure if you saw this at the time....
I like to think the glass is half full and that everyone brings something to the table. I would bet money that you will watch this video more than once, and the music is not my style either. A good lesson in never judging a book by it's cover. Just an amazing story. Enjoy.
It's some phone salesman dude from Britain's Got Talent.
Great story and cool to see Simon Cowell doing the same Idol gig but on another show.
The contestant's name is Paul Potts', great voice-bad teeth. Remember it's Britain's Got Talent, not a dental plan.
Paul eventually won the whole thing.
Posted by Humble on September 26, 2007 @ 11:05|Permalink
And now more from Baby Fat Head.
Today our dog Tucker is finally have his nuts clipped off. After 2 other failed attempts due to some elevated liver enzymes he will be sans-testes.
Will he be the same dog?
Will he be more/less active?(If it's actually possible to be "less active" than he is now!)
Will he still have the urge to hump his slippers?
All will be revealed when he comes home Thursday with his sack snipped and sporting one of those pathetic dog cones.
Charlie's soccer season finally ended last night with a 1-0 loss. She was devastated. She's cool now, but I know she was upset for a number of reasons.
1) Losing sucks.
2) The season is over.
3) She loved being part of that team.
I will say this, she has improved immensely over the last year. She's a gamer and she is very coach-able. Big ups to Rob, Ed and Ralf, the Dad's who made a big difference in her improved abilities over the last 10 months.
Not to mention Coach Me who guided her through the indoor season by shrieking, "Score now. Kick ball. Score now, ahhhhhhhh!"
Yes it's sad soccer is over.
Not to be confused with the soccer that's starts indoors again in about 3 weeks time.
Finally, ran into Steve Smith(RedGreen) at Lumby's golf tournament yesterday. What a mench.(Yiddish word for "good man.) I asked him if he missed doing the show and he gave me an emphatic "NO!"
He spends 6 months in Florida playing golf and singing with a trio that includes his wife and another guy and he's loving it.
The three of them gig around the state and he plays golf almost every day of the week.
Couldn't happen to a nicer guy.
Posted by Humble on September 19, 2007 @ 10:32|Permalink
Some quick stuff then I have to go.
I mentioned yesterday I'm playing in Jeff Lumby's charity golf thing west of Cambridge today so I'll just throw out a few things.
I'm looking for roof-quotes this week cause all the houses in my neighborhood have reached the re-shingling age and my shack is no different. Anybody know a great outfit? I'm getting three quotes already but if you have an uncle or a buddy that does this kind of thing, let me know.
I power-washed and cleaned my garage this past weekend. Dam I love power-washing.
I cleared out the whole thing and then I spent way too long cleaning the garage floor.
I have mentioned before how much I love to power-wash. It's very satisfying, it makes you think you've actually accomplished something when in reality all you've done is blasted off a layer of grime.
Years ago I gave away a power-washer I had gotten for free and now for the life of me I can't remember why.
I have tasted the joy of power-washing and it is sweet.
I mentioned yesterday about working on a TV thing. I have a couple of deals in play, neither involve me on camera (well, maybe) but both are pretty cool and I hope to be able to tell you about them sooner than later.
One is already in the pitch stage and is being shopped around and the other is just getting started.
I am pretty excited about both of these possible productions not only for the opportunity but also for the chance to work with some pretty creative people.
Not to mention giving me something to do besides my current schedule. Current Schedule.
Wake up.
Drive my kids to bus.
Read the paper.
Write drivel for blog.
Hit golf balls.
Drive my kids to soccer!
Drink red wine.
Pass out in my own sick.
Repeat.
Posted by Humble on September 18, 2007 @ 07:28|Permalink
Some great time wasters. Yes you waste time, not just me.
My pal Pierre M sent me this during a slow minute at work.
Ask the Mighty Thor at Askthor.com.
Very funny and juvenille and immature. I'm for all that.
It's a site where, as far as I can tell, other immature as The Mighty Thor questions and he answers them.
For instance: "Dear Thor,
Loki stole my glass eye again- can you find him and beat some sense into him for once?
Odin
Dear Faux-F**k,
You sound like the type of candy ass that goes to a rock concert and complains about the smell of weed. Piss off!"
I love this type of crap and you will too. Check it out here, and then come back.
Posted by Humble on September 18, 2007 @ 07:25|Permalink
A new week of stuff from Baby Fat Head.
Baby Fat Head makes me laugh. He's happy, he's a baby and he's got a Fat Head.
Hi BFH.
Hi Howie.
Anyway. Last week I was searching for the Oprah interview with Letterman and this weekend the whole thing was finally up on the YouTube. It's an awesome exchange and a rare glimpse inside the very private life of Letterman. It's in three parts...go here to get started. Then of course come back for more Baby Fat Head.
Yesterday I played a Parents vs The Kids soccer game. Damm them 13 years olds are good.
Today I am sore. My back, my things and my knees. And I just played goal!
At one point one of the girls yelled, "Shoot along the ground, I don't think he can bend over!"
She was right.
Tomorrow I'm playing my last charity golf scramble of the year. My good pal Jeff Lumby of Dave Fm Kitchener is having a fund-raiser and has asked me to be one of the celebrities. I think he's just being kind, but I'm happy to hang out. Dan Duran and Steve Smith will also be attending so there will be some real famous people for the golfers to meet.
Coming soon from Baby Fat Head.
Humble does some more more stand-up, appears in a movie and signs a big TV deal. I'm not crapping you.
Details to follow.
Posted by Humble on September 17, 2007 @ 09:15|Permalink
Not in Radio and I'm not affected by....
When I was on the air I had to keep track of or fake interest in a lot of stuff I really didn't care about.
For instance, The TIFF. I used to have to talk about it like I gave a crap. I didn't and now I don't.
The only Film Fest chatter around our house has come from Randee who staked out the Four Seasons one night last weekend with her friends looking for stars. I'd rather be tortured.
I also didn't have to pretend to be excited about Canadian Idol or the CI winner. I do miss goofing around with Jake Gold though.
I read that the producers are taking the final 3 on the road. Very good idea that will no doubt sell out. Very smart those people!
Best of all I don't have to pretend to give two craps about the Leafs training camp, the Bells kids suspension or the new-look uniforms. Actually I am looking forward to mocking them for another year, that's always fun.
Go Ottawa!
I miss a lot of things about not broadcasting somewhere to someone every day but having to introduce Bon Jovi songs and talk about a lot of things I don't care about isn't one of them.
I do miss the free stuff. And my groupies. And the endless roof-top Meth-parties.
Posted by Humble on September 13, 2007 @ 08:34|Permalink
More thoughts from Baby Fat Head.
Hey kids, it's baby Fat Head again and here are some random issues from the mind of an immature man.
Thanks to you nice people that commented last time BFH appeared. I was talking about how my oldest daughter is officially embarrassed by almost everything I do.
Andrea said, "One day soon all incoming phone calls will be routed to the correct party by her, and even if the call may be for you ( chances are rare it will be ) your loving child then ask the caller if they plan to be on the phone with you for long."
Funny and very true. Last night Charlie spoked to her BFF for nearly 45 minutes all the while walking around the house, chatting on MSN, having a snack and cleaning her room. Of course at no time were we allowed to ask for or to talk on the phone.
Charlie's soccer team is having a parent-child game this Sunday and I'm worried that Baby Fat Head may have a coronary. I'm not in the best of shapes (I'm actually sort of oblong these days) and I am certainly not fit to run around with a group of highly-trained 12/13 year-olds girls.
Mostly I'm worried that I may have an episode and everyone will think I'm kidding.
I'll start clutching my chest and writhing around on the ground and the other parents will be all,"Oh that Howard, what a joker. Look he's pretending to have a heart attack. He's funny!"
Meanwhile, I turn purple and die.
Attention soccer parents or anyone else. If I look like I'm about to pass out IM NOT KIDDING! Call someone immediately.
Would you buy seafood from a guy in a pick-up truck? We have this dude who sits out by the side of the road near my house with a sign saying "Fresh Seafood." Uh, no thanks.
I mean I'm sure his shrimp and lobster are fine but it just seems weird. Corn, yes, berries, okay, fish not so much.
"Hmmm this scampi is fantastic where did you get it?"
"From some dirty guy in a truck at 9th line and Upper Middle road."
"Yes, I can taste that."
Posted by Humble on September 11, 2007 @ 09:13|Permalink
New York. New York.
New York is my favorite city. I don't think I could live there but I love hanging out for a few days at a time.
I stayed on 34th and 7ave, across from Madison Square Gardens and as usual in NYC, the whole world walks by constantly.
I sat in a coffee shop before one of my meetings and just gawked at people. Strange people, super hot women-people, smelly people, crazy people and every other kind of people there is. Some highlights:
Being yelled at by a cab driver cause I wasn't getting the whole "Cab strike" thing.
Being in New York during a Cab Strike.
Seeing Ground Zero. Looks different this time, the subways are up and running underneath and there is an re-building vibe to the place. Still eerie though.
Hanging out with my cousins at an out of the way neighborhood Italian joint I never would have known about.
Visiting the Museum of Television and Radio and watching a film of classic TV stand-up. Very cool featuring everyone from Jack Benny to Jerry Seinfeld.
Being #30 in line for take off at La Guardia. Okay that wasn't a highlight just a very New York thing.
Of course I got back Friday night and was slammed back into reality. Saturday and Sunday I watched 6 soccer games. That's right 6!
No it wasn't part of a suspended sentence.
Posted by Humble on September 10, 2007 @ 09:41|Permalink
Some thoughts from Baby Fat Head.
Item # 1. My oldest daughter is a great kid and one of my favorite people, but it's official: she would like me better if I were invisible. And very quiet. It seems many things I do and say make her role her eyes. Things like not being invisible and quiet.
I dropped her off at the bus yesterday and when we saw her friends I offered to stop the car half a block away. She accepted and that is that. Today, same thing and so it goes.
I'm guessing this gets worse before it gets better.
Item # 2: Dalton McGinty and the Liberals announce they might be interested in a stat holiday in the bleak month of February. Oh and their campaign won't officially kick off til next week.
Really. And we're just supposed to suck that down as though it weren't a load of Shite?
Hey who doesn't want a day off in the crappiest month of the winter but remember Dalton promised a lot of things last time and didn't keep his word. Little things like not raising taxes and about a hundred other tidbits.
I don't want to be cynical(yeah right) but I think this his campaign to be re-elected has begun.
Item last. I'm looking forward to the following TV shows. Curb your Enthusiasm, (maybe one of the best shows ever) Prison Break, Chuck(hot secret agent sidekick) and Weeds. Also all new episodes of Iron Chef America, Jamie at Home and Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares.
You know I watch a lot of shows on The Food Network. Seriously and I don't know why. I can't cook to save my life, but I find some kind of weird comfort in watching others do it. Kind of like food-porn.
Posted by Humble on September 5, 2007 @ 08:15|Permalink
Just some catching up.
I love the show Entourage. If you haven't seen it, get the DVD and catch up.
Most people agree that Jeremy Priven as Ari Gold is the show. But the rest of the dudes are cool too.
Have a look.
I spent the weekend doing some Air Show stuff but I must say Congrats to my pals David White, Mike Krum and the rest of the mens and womens that put on this mother. It is by far the best anywhere and Torontonians should be damn proud. That's right be proud people cause the CIAS is the shite, as the kids say.
I drank way too much Scotch Saturday night at an AirShow function, cabbed it home and starting barking about how we never have any frozen pizza in our house.
My kids thought it was quite amusing and inquired after my state of drunkenness.
Speaking of which, my babies went back to school today. Grade 4 and Grade FREAKIN 8!
Squeeze me?
I have a kid in grade 8? Me.
Scares the crap out of me cause when this happens again next year, I'll have a child in High School and that will make me a very very old man.
One more story on Ernie Butler for you people in the 416/905 that may have heard of him. Check it out here.
Posted by Humble on September 4, 2007 @ 15:04|Permalink
Hey Everybody...it's Rosh Hashanah Girl!
As you no doubt know, next week is Rosh Hashanah and what better way to get ready for the Jewish New Year than a sort of cute Hebrew chick singing about it.
Enjoy.
Posted by Humble on September 4, 2007 @ 08:24|Permalink
Blogging about Blogging. Now this is Profound!
Posted by Humble on August 31, 2007 @ 09:20|Permalink
Long weekend and then what.
Usually at this time of year I'd be all gung-ho to get the Fall book started. For you non-radio types, the Fall BBM period begins Tuesday and goes for a couple of months. It's the most important ratings survey of the year as a good portion of advertising dough is up for grabs and a lot of it is based on the numbers that come out of this survey.
This year I won't be part of it again.
Last year I was still shell-shocked from being canned but this year I'm actually a bit sad/jealous/nostalgic to be on the sidelines.
I'm asked all the time of I miss being on the Radio and most of the time I don't. I miss being part of a creative team working on things that will hopefully increase the ratings. Or at the very least, amuse ourselves.
Make sure you check out the AirShow this weekend it's going to be awesome.
I hope you have a great last-long-weekend-of-summer and play safe.
See you back here Tuesday.
h
Posted by Humble on August 31, 2007 @ 09:09|Permalink
Spencer and Me.
This is my 9 year old Spencer.
She doesn't like her name.
She likes to sing and watch TV and read Harry Potter books and annoy her big sister.
She plays house-league soccer and has about the greatest laugh I've ever heard.
She's not the most athletic kid but as it turns out she does have a VERY GOOD golf swing.
Must be genetic.
Up until last night we've only ever just hit balls on a range. She's learned through imitation and some instruction. She whiffs a lot, but when she hits it, it goes.
We played a little par three course near the house and on the first tee we get paired up with a couple of 20 year old dudes.
I say we'll pick up her ball if she is slowing things down.
So Spencer gets up on the first tee with her driver, 110 yards from the hole and just whacks the shite out of it.
High, soft, draw, pin-high right.
The dude's jaws drop. I beam with pride. Spencer looks at me with that kid-grin that says, "Howd you like that Pop?"
4 holes later she got a blister that popped and we had to stop, but I'll never forget that first tee shot and neither will she.
She says she can't wait to go back and that's the best a Dad can hope for.
BTW. This is exactly the kind of story I miss being able to tell my Dad. He would have loved to hear it and he would have loved the way she swings a club.
Posted by Humble on August 30, 2007 @ 09:53|Permalink
Holister, Abercrombie, American Eagle.
For reasons I have discussed earlier (I'm a big Dad-Suck) my daughters convinced me to take them to Sherway Gardens Mall yesterday.
Wow.
I don't know if you non Dad-Sucks know about this but these three stores(Hollister, Abercrombie and Fitch, American Eagle) are part of some weird cult that wants you to have their name on everything you wear.
They are dark, noisy, hot, places, that are filled with tweens and teens trying on 34 dollar halter's.
I sat and read the paper.
I sat and read a magazine.
I sat and waited and got all whoozy.
My Daughters loved it. They stood in line at Hollister for more than half an hour to pay!
I nodded off.
At one point I had to call my wife to see if a top was "well-priced" and to make sure my 9 year old wasn't trying to hose me.
In the end it was a great Daddy-Daughter outing and that's all that mattered. We hung out, had some frothy drinks and cookies and then went home.
The girls thought I did well for my first time.
Daddy had to have a lay down.
Posted by Humble on August 30, 2007 @ 09:37|Permalink
The Dog Days of Summer.
These must be the dog days.
I have no idea why their called that. I suppose I could Google it but I'm too lazy.
My wife is at the CNE today with her friend Sharyl. I would rather have hot coal rubbed on my eyeballs.
I haven't been to the CNE in years but Randee loves it for reason's I can't explain.
The whole place smells like a giant fart to me.
So, the other chicks I live with, aged 12 and 9, are taking me back to school shopping at Sherway.
Why I agreed to this should be a warning to you other Fathers of Daughters out there. In a moment of Daddy-weakness I said yes.
Now I'll be dragged in and out of little-Girl stores all day looking for "Tops" and "Hair-bands" and other chick-junk. The only saving grace is the odd Hot Mom sighting. And the inevitable after-shopping ice cream.
I have no job. I have no job prospects.
I have a couple of things that are getting close and I am anxious to be able to tell you. Some of my pals that read this drivel every day know what I'm talking about but I'd like to be able to tell you Hhdotcom Regular Readers.
I will say that the one thing that's about to close is one of those long shots that could be huge. Or not.
It is it's exciting.
It's not Radio.
Right now Radio seems like something I use to do and I'm not sure I'll do again.
Who knows.
Maybe I should have gone to the CNE and tried to get a gig at the Whack-a-Mole booth.
I would if the whole place didn't smell like ass.
Posted by Humble on August 29, 2007 @ 09:44|Permalink
Broken Toe, Rack of Lamb, Thrills and Dog-Whiz.
We tried to do it all Saturday and Sunday.
We went to the St.Lawrence Market and stumbled into Busker Fest. Very cool, very non-Oakville.
We saw a man named Dynamite juggle machetes on top of a ten-foot uni-cycle. You don't see that a lot in the 905!
We bought a rack of lamb and barbecued it. It was okay, but I don't have to eat it again anytime soon.
Also bought some Thrills gum. Do you remember Thrills? Little blue-squares that are packed with flavor for about the first 5 seconds and then nothing.
Yes they still taste like soap. Maybe that's why they call them Thrills.
"Hey wanna have the fun of chewing soap without all the fuss and muss of actually chewing soap?"
I think I broke my toe. A few weeks ago while docking a boat, I jammed one of my toes between the boat and the dock. Hurt like a bitch.
Anyway, on Saturday I jammed/stubbed into the side of my desk so hard I was yelling/laughing/nearly crying all at the same time.
It has to be broken. I may need a transplant.
Finally, Tucker the Dog, took another whiz on a pair of my shorts again.
Why Tucker, why?
We wake up, I put him out, I let him in, he pee's on my shorts.
Not just a little either. The whole, "haven't peed for nearly 11 hours" pee.
For a little dog he holds a lot of whiz.
Maybe I should wash his mouth out with Thrills.
Posted by Humble on August 27, 2007 @ 09:22|Permalink
The Air Show is Coming. Make plans to go.
We are dam lucky to live in this area.
Great city, decent climate, lot's of hot chicks and next week a bunch of cool planes will be flying around.
Does it get any better?
I've been involved peripherally with the CIAS (Canadian International Airshow) for the last couple of months, I'm on the board of directors which pretty much boils to a few meetings and some childish discourse. Right up my alley!
My real involvement has been through one of my best pals DW, he of the Freakishly Giant Brain. DW is responsible for booking many of the acts that will be performing next weekend.
People, if you like planes your going to love this years show. Yes I know there have been planes there in the past but this year is going to kick ass.
The Snowbirds of course, a CF-18 flown by a Toronto dude who graduated from Seneca, a Corsair, aerobatic she-devil Patty Wagstaff and for the very first time landing at an non-US airport the F-22 Raptors-they will give you a boner. (If you can't wait check out this YouTubery.)
Posted by Humble on August 24, 2007 @ 08:56|Permalink
Ronald Mcdonald does good work!
Today for the 3rd year in a row the nice people at the Toronto Ronald McDonald House have asked me to host their annual golf tourney. It is a great organization and a fun event.
Last year, a young boy who had cancer and had stayed at the house for nearly a year, spoke eloquently and emotionally about what the organization had meant to him and there wasn't a dry eye in the place.
It's a good group and great cause and I'm happy to help out and make my stupid comments and give away the prizes.
For more on this nice bunch go here.
Posted by Humble on August 21, 2007 @ 09:54|Permalink
This past weekend.
For the third year in a row 3 of my best pals and their wives got together for a night of debauchery,dancing and non-stop laughter.
Sort of the Bill Chill redux with jokes.
It's a chance for all four of us, who've known each other since we were 18, to get together and see how badly we're aging!
Funny our wives look great-but dam we're getting old.
Just kidding.
Actually it is always fun to hang out and talk about the old days when we were all intro-ing songs and trying to make a living.
In the three years since we started this tradition we're definitely slowing down. The first couple of years no one could remember much about the night before, cept the fire, skinning dipping, house-dancing and some inadvertent french-kissing.
This year there was no fire, no skinny-dipping and I only frenched my own wife. Although I did receive a very nice neck rub from one of my friends wives.
In the end we go our separate ways and in the blink of an eye a year goes by and we'll do it all again.
That's really the most bizarre thing about this get together, not only seeing one another getting older, but also how quickly that 12 months evaporates.
Next year the first of our group will turn 50!
Soon this party will start at noon and dinner will be served at 4:30 and then we'll watch the news and go to bed.
I'm betting it'll still be filled with laughter.
Posted by Humble on August 20, 2007 @ 09:31|Permalink
A few more things from the Desk of HAG.
I hung out with my old friend John Verdon last night, the genius behind the Lakeport success,(Great beer, fair prices!)
He's got a full scale bar in his basement and I saw it for the first time. It's amazing.
Some people finish their basement and put in a bar and a pool table but Johns actually made it look exactly like a functioning bar. Very cool.
He's no longer with Lakeport but I know he'll be up to something soon, he's a bright boy.
In the meantime he's another out-of-work Dad in the neighborhood.
Tonight is a big deal around here. It's High School Musical 2.
If you've never heard of this chances are your kids are grown up or under 5.
Disney made this sappy little movie a couple of years ago and it turned into a phenomena.
All the little girls love it.
It's about a boy and girl from two different sides of the school clique system coming together to sing. Oooh dreamy.
Anyway tonight's the sequel and kids all over North America, mine included, are having High School Musical watching parties. Fun.
I'll be in the other room drinking something distilled from potatoes with orange juice.
I haven't posted anything this week about Tiger cause I was up at the cottage.
It was fun watching him win his 13th major and creep ever closer to Jack's record.
Good on Mike Weir getting picked for the President's Cup team. Too bad Stephen Ames made a doody in pants and played his way off.
Have a great weekend and be safe and well.
h
Posted by Humble on August 17, 2007 @ 10:18|Permalink
The Buddy List.
Dang I wish I could remember what site I was on when I found this. Sorry, but I'm old and my mind is addled by Tequila.
Have a look at this discussion from New York Entertainment about buddies in movies. Pretty interesting and cool who they think are the best Buddies in Movies of all time. Check it here.
Then come back.
Posted by Humble on August 16, 2007 @ 10:34|Permalink
Where the Hell have you been?
Hey HhDotcom peeps. What up?
I apologize for leaving you drivel-free for these last couple of weeks but I've been Up North.
That always sounds so nebulous to me when people say it but it does cover the subject nicely.
Up North, at a Cottage, Away.
It was 10 days of fun, sun, sticky buns, booze, boats and water.
I was gone so long I forgot what I did for a living. Then I remembered. Oh yeah, nothing!
Anyway, I'm back and I don't have anything to announce yet. Sorry. Seems the project is in full stall mode.
I'll let you know as soon as I do.
In the meantime a couple of shots from the Glassman Family Holiday.
"The Babies!"
"The Parents!"
Posted by Humble on August 16, 2007 @ 09:55|Permalink
Happy Capitalism.
For over half my life, Lou Schizas has been one of my best friends.
He and I were "set up" by a mutual pal who told both of us..."There's this guy I know whom I'd think you'd really hit it off with."
She was right.
We met at some party in Calgary about 1983 and that was it.
Some of you know him from the Oakley show on Am 640. Well Oakley inherited Lou from me.
Lou first started back on a morning show I was doing in Cowtown on a feature we called "Ask Mr. Schizas."
He was hysterical and smart and a good friend.
He still is.
He just launched his own website HappyCapitalism.
If your looking for some great stock advice and insight I highly recommend you check it out.
Posted by Humble on August 4, 2007 @ 08:15|Permalink
Content from you is always good.
Thanks to my pal Fraser P for sending me this cool article on Tiger.
As some of you know I have a man-crush on Tiger and if we both lived on the same block I would go over to see if he wanted to hang out. BFF's.
Anyway just so you know here's some more CSBU.(Content Supplied By You!)
David Feherty on Tiger Woods
"People have accused me of being so far up Tiger's a.., that
he can barely make a full swing, but I maintain that he is a special
person.
There's no one else on the planet who can do what he does or
even think of doing what he does. I've often thought, instead of
showing
Tiger's reaction to a shot he's hit, we really should show the reaction
of those around him."
But here is the next best thing. "I'm walking down the 18th
fairway at Firestone Country Club with Ernie Els and Tiger, who has
popped up a three-wood about 40 yards behind Ernie into some wet,
nasty, horrible, six-inch rough," Feherty says.
"Tiger's cursing and taking clumps out of Ohio with his
three-wood. And, of course, we're not showing this on TV because we
want to be able to interview him later. Ernie and I walk past
Tiger's ball, and it is truly buried.
"Ernie is tied with Tiger and he's in the middle of the
fairway. I'm standing with Ernie and my microphone is open. Ken Venturi
[in the CBS booth] sends it to me and I say, 'Tiger's got 184 yards with
two big red oaks overhanging the green. He's got absolutely nothing.
With a stick of dynamite and a sand wedge I might be able to move this ball 50
yards.
Steve Williams [Woods' caddie] tells me [with a hand signal]
that he's using a pitching wedge.'
"Tiger takes his swing. Every muscle in his body is flung at
the ball. It looks like he's torn his nutsack. The divot went as far as
I could hit the ball. I've got my microphone at my mouth thinking,
what the hell was that!
The ball sails over the trees, lands behind the hole and
backs up to about six feet from the flag. I open my microphone and
Ernie
turns and says, 'F*** me!'
"My producer comes on in my earpiece and says, 'Was that
Ernie?' I say yes.
He says, 'Fair enough.'
"I could have described that shot for 15 minutes and not
done as good a job as Ernie did with two words. This is one of the best
players in the world talking, and you wanna know how good Tiger
is? Ask Ernie Els."
Posted by Humble on August 2, 2007 @ 14:59|Permalink
I have a Tilley Hat. Yes I do.
When I was in OshKosh I bought my first Tilley Hat. It was hot as ass down there and I wanted something to keep the sun off my neck and picked one up.
It's awesome. I love it and I feel like an explorer when I wear it. Even if I'm only exploring the possibility of having another beer.
These people are freaks for The Hat though. The thing comes with a 4 page owners manual. Seriously. Check it out here.
Then come back.
So far the only thing I don't like about it is the sweat factor. I get all sweaty in the back of my head.
I thought it might allow more air-flow but it doesn't .
Maybe I just have an extra sweaty head.
This guy in the Tilley Hat doesn't seem to have a sweaty head. Does he not sweat? Is he too cool? I'll be he sweats plenty but they probably dried off his soggy bean prior to the shoot.
Posted by Humble on August 1, 2007 @ 10:48|Permalink
OshKosh. By Gosh.
The worlds biggest Aviation Expo/Flyin/Airshow.
Thats where I was. My Gino-Brained pal Dave White and I went to OshKosh last week.
This is the penultimate experience for pilots. Pilot porn as my pal DW says, and he's right. Here's what it's all about.
Here's what it looks like.
I'll try and give you some sense of what we did.
-Flew in, planes everywhere, had to abort the landing and go round. Flew in again, more planes, some jet practicing off my left wing, told to land long on green dot, bang the plane down on the runway in one of my worst landings since I started to fly. Head on fire.
-Set up camp, registered, looked around, then tried to drink away memory of horrifying landing.
-Day two: Spent all day looking at planes and chicks and then watched the air show, which was awesome. Found a restaurant, ate with 2 old pilots named Bob, drank more beer, slept.
Day three: Walked around aviation pavilions filled with more pilot porn, didn't drink enough water, got a little heat stroke. Later decided to treat heat stroke by drinking 3 double scotches. Next morning felt fine. If by fine you mean nearly dead.
Day four: Officially tired of doing my business in the port-o-lets. There's only so much OPP I can tolerate. (Other People's Poo.)
Day five: DW and I fall asleep in EAA museum. More walking around, watch the air show again and eat dinner with a half-crazed drunk guy named Bud. Bud keeps yelling,"Don't be shy!" and ordering more beer. Bud pays for dinner. We paid too, trust me.
Day six: Depart after 30 minute wait, fly direct over Huron and Michigan and through some bumpy clouds. Land safely and unpack.
There were a ton of other incidents and observations but you get the idea. It was a week of non-stop laughing, farting, beer drinking, eating TCIC (things covered in cheese) bizarre Americans, showering in a trailer, seeing Morgan Freeman at breakfast, being quizzed by the hostess at the Hilton, walking back to the plane drunk in the rain, more farting and eating.
Here's where I slept.
Here's who I went with.
Posted by Humble on July 30, 2007 @ 09:34|Permalink
Future Shop enjoys the sucking of Ass.
The FutureShop nightmare continues.
Last week I wrote this.
Basically I ordered something from FS online and I'm not getting it. It's a long, bizarre tale involving an out-of-work comic/dj and a big, bloated corporation that has no interest in customer service.
If they did I wouldn't say they sucked ass.
Briefly heres' the deal.
Thursday and Friday of last week I spent more than an hour talking to FS customer service people who informed me that even though they couldn't find the item I ordered I wasn't allowed to get my money back before a trace claim was filed.
I don't give a crap I said. Hows about you just order me up a new item (Cool Garmin Street Pilot C330!) and when you nitwits locate my original item, keep it and I'll keep the new one you send me.
"NO Deal," Says FutureShop. That's not our policy. But if you'd like, you can order and pay for a new one and when we locate your original item we'll credit you in full.
"Suck me," Says I.(I'm paraphrasing.)
Why do I have to give you more money after you've already screwed this thing up in the first place.
Cut to today.
I get a nice call from Canada Post who tell me that they've traced the item, can't find it and are declaring it lost. They'll refund FutureShop. Super.
So I get back on the phone with this dip-shit organization and tell them the Canada Post info and they tell me if I want the item now I have to re-order it.
Squeeze me? I have to order it again. But I already ordered it you idiots. You can plainly see that.
So lets' review.
A)They screwed up.
B)I couldn't get my money back.
C)Now that they're declaring lost...
D)I get my money back and I have to order it again.
Am I high? Why am I working this hard for FutureShop?
Are they daring me to buy it somewhere else?
I have tried and tried to talk to someone in the organization about how ass-backwards this is but I keep being told it's "Our corporate online policy!"
That's quite a policy.
It's the "Customer's an Ass-Wipe and we don't care about them" policy.
Item #1. Anti-Smoking Tablet could cure booze trouble.
A pill that is being developed to interrupt the receptors in the brain that release dopamine and nullify the effects of nicotine could also be helpful with Alcohol addiction.
Dang it and I thought I could just take a pill to get the booze and eliminated the twice-daily trips to the LCBO.
Item #2. Warren Buffett Shares stock fotune.
Billionaire WB sells 572 thousand share of Berkshire stock which nets 2 billion for charities.
Great story of philanthropy but that means Berkshire stock is selling for 3 thousand dollars a share! Nice.
"Uh yes, I'd like to buy 1 share of Berkshire please. Actually I'd like to go half-sies on it."
Item #3 Your Iphone is minutes away from obsolescence.
I read an interesting piece on the weekend about how our gadgetry is being made more and more obsolete. It has to do with something called Moore's Law and the computer chip getting faster exponentially and the associated gunk with it.
Well today I saw a thing about how Apple may be already looking to augment their IPhone with a Nano version a smaller, cheaper model and could help boost sales.
Well that didn't take too long considering the 600 dollar IPhone is only 2 weeks old!
Did all those geeks lining up think that Apple wouldn't be coming out with something smaller and cheaper by the time they all got their Visa bills?
I'm waiting until the IPhone is free with a 3 year plan.
My wife Randee turned me onto this site filled with Jewish humour. Dang those Hebrews are sure funny.
It's called Jewlarious.com and it's full of Jew-centric jokes, video's and more.
Here's an example of some of the ha ha's.
Two non-Jewish men meet each other on the street. The first one says, "Good morning Luke. You own your own business don't you? How's it going?"
Luke responds, "Just great. Thanks for asking."
If you don't get that have one of your Jewish friends explain it to you.
Hey, I'm one of your Jewish friends so I'll do it for you.
You see in the joke it's two "Non-Jews" who own their own business and when asked they say business is good. If it were two "Jewish" business people, there would be no end of complaining.
Ha ha. It's Jew-riffic!
This long weekend feels likes it's been going on for a year. Wait a minute it has.
Did I miss the whole Prince's thing at Wembley? Should I care?
Did you see it? Do you care?
I loved Diana and fantasized about her touching my Royal Septer as much as the next guy, but I must admit I forgot all about the Concert and Tribute.
Maybe next time.
I was busy this past weekend with non-stop peeps at the house. It's fun to have peeps at the house as long those peeps don't peep in the pool.
Friday played golf-not bad-hung out at pool after. Saturday, Cleaned pool, swam, hung out, had people over, drank Tequilla.
(Did you know that Tequilla makes your face numb? It does so.) Sunday, hung out, had people over, swam, only drank coffee(face still numb from night before)
I may have told you this before, but that pool was the best money we ever spent.
DW and I were supposed to fly Sunday after the plane being in the shop for a month but when we got there some gas was leaking out of an access panel on the wing.
Not good.
Once we were in the air the fuel would have been sucked out and we'd be looking for a field.
Also not good.
In the last 4 weeks of not-flying I've been golfing a little more. Actually more than I have in the last couple of years and I've enjoyed it.
I found that I'm still in love with Golf I just don't want to be married to it anymore. Last time it broke my heart and crapped in the hole and I'm not ready to devote myself to it again.
Having said that I was on the range of a course this morning at 7:45 for an 8am lesson and then spent 3 hours hitting balls.
Okay maybe I'm not ready to marry golf again but I would like to bone it every so often.
Truthfully the whole marriage/golf/screwing metaphor is making me dizzy.
Posted by Humble on July 3, 2007 @ 12:01|Permalink
Schools Out for the Girlies...
We took the girls to an end of school year dinner last night at Outback Steakhouse.
Nice joint. Only my second time and it wasn't bad.
Of course we had to have the Bloomin Onion.
Tasty battered-dipped onion and a zesty sauce.
Well of course Fat Daddy had to eat a ton of it and I spent the rest of the night farting like a mad man.
I kept saying, "The Bloomin Onion's given me Bloomin Gas!" and then laughing like an idiot.
The Women I live with didn't think it was anywhere near as funny as I did.
Anyway I now am Daddy to a girl in Grade 4 and a girl in Grade 8.
As I said yesterday, how this happened, I'll never know.
Yesterday The Grade 8 had about 10+ people over here for a swim.
Some of those people were boy-people and I could see the look in my daughters eyes whenever I'd come outside.
"Please Daddy, don't be an Ass! Please?" Her eyes said.
For the most part I complied.
On her next birthday she'll be 13 and then my Daddy Nightmare will really kick in.
For you new Fathers of Daughters, I recommend you practice saying No and start drinking more.
Posted by Humble on June 29, 2007 @ 10:22|Permalink
Some thoughts for a Thursday in June.
Today is Charlie's last day of school. Next year she'll be in Grade 8.
Grade 8?
How the hell did that happen!
If she's in Grade 8 then I must be nearly 60.
She's got her whole life ahead of her and I've got liver spots, enlarged prostrate and dementia.
I see Bobby Vinton is coming to the Fallsview Casino. Super.
That would definitely be a social demarcation line for me.
You know those things that pop up that basically let you know immediately if your going to like someone or not.
At a function if someone says, "Hey we just got tickets for Bobby Vinton at the Fallsview!"
Wouldn't that would pretty much be it?
Wouldn't you be all, "Really well I've got to go uh, uh I've got to go talk to the guy that's dressed like Scotty from StarTrek."
Entertainment bits that sound dirty but ain't.
Harry Potter, the new Cirque du Soleil show "Kooza!" (If you don't know why Kooza sounds dirty go ask any guy.) and of course the all time champion Herbie Hancock.
How much grief did Herbie get from his buds when he was 10-15.
"Hey Herbie, what's in your hand? Cock!"
Posted by Humble on June 28, 2007 @ 09:37|Permalink
LKTYP Golf Tourny, old pals and Tucker Pee.
Dateline: Oakville, Ontario.
The LKTYP Golf Tourny a smashing success says committee Chairman Howard Glassman.
"The weather, the course, the food, the fun all contributed to a great day of fund raising and
friend raising," said Glassman.
That's just the type of crap Glassman is known to say.
Howard went on to say that besides a lot of money raised it was great to see friends new and old enjoying themselves in such a great setting.
Yes it was hotter than ass out on the course but the round went quickly due to a great Glenn Abbey crew and of course massive cheating.
Dateline: My Bedroom, this Morning.
Tucker Glassman whizzes on owners shorts.
Tucker Glassman, a well-known slipper humping maniac, wasn't let out this morning by any of his owners. This resulted in a boat-load of Tucker whiz deposited on Howard Glassman's shorts.
Glassman said, "Tucker, bad boy, don't whiz on my shorts!'
Tucker was reluctant to comment as he was busy working on his thesis, "Sphincter licking vs Dinky licking."
Mrs. Glassman confirmed the shorts did indeed contain Tucker-Whiz and then went back to sleep. Of course considering what else Tucker does for a living (Slipper-Humping) it could have been a lot worse.
Yes its time for another round of Things I don't care about it.
A chance to write sarcastic and snarky comments about things I barely know anything about.
Fun.
I don't care about most golf tournament that don't include Tiger. Sorry. I don't see you Leaf fans watching a lot of Tampa Bay games. Same dif.
I don't care about Fibre supplements. I like getting my Fibre the old fashioned way, salty meat, pretzels and beer. ( HHdotCom assumes no responsibility for anyone who actually goes on a salty meat, pretzels and beer diet thinking that they actually contain any fibre.)
I don't care about Men wearing Long Shorts. Or Culottes. I think they look like sissy-boys but I'm not so much with the caring. I say if you think you look good in them then fine, no matter how much we're all giggling at you behind your back.
I don't care about Summer TV or Rosie O'Donnell turning down the Price is Right or who might be Bob Barkers replacement. It's too hot and I'm too busy drinking beer and eating pork rinds. (Kosher of course.)
Finally. I don't care about the Humidex, cottage country traffic, income funds or income trusts,
square-headed drivers that look like eggo-waffles or Telus buying BCE or is it the other way round.
I really don't care about Paris Hilton talking to Larry King on CNN.
Paris Hilton doing Larry King on CNN I might care about.
I was lucky enough to hang with some cool peeps downtown Saturday night as my boy Steven Feruglio (Stinky) invited me to his company's 13 anniversary party.
All the neat people were there:
A) Because neat people like X-Design.
B) The party had nice snacks and hot chicks.(Great combo)
C) Steely Dan tribute band Pretzel Logic rocked the house.
Oh yeah, it was also partner Greg Quinn's 40th birthday celebration. Though he was trying to play that down.
Lucky guy that Greg.
Great company, beautiful family and a SMW(Smoking hot wife) who's got to be at least 10 years younger!
Congrats on 13 great years X-Design and thanks for letting me see the Dan/Pretzel up close.
Posted by Humble on June 25, 2007 @ 10:06|Permalink
Weekend Soccer, Golf Tourney and some other junk.
I was at 5 soccer games this weekend.
No I didn't lose a bet, I actually had a great time. I love being a soccer Dad.
I'm not just a portable ATM machine, I'm portable ATM machine that mainly drives back and forth to soccer games.
This weekend was a big Select tournament in Erin Mills and Charlie's team The Golden Thunder or Blurred Vision or whatever they're name is, dominated.
Oh sure every Dad thinks they're kids team is good.
Nay I say to you. Nay.
This team from the O-dot won every game and the championship and some cool trophy's. That's domination my friends.
No I wasn't too proud. Bursting is more like it.
For the the season her team like 10, O and 1. That's no losses and a tie. Keep up the good work Marauders. (I can never remember the name of the team.)
Today after 6 months of planning it's finally arrived. The first annual LKTYP Golf Tournament.
Lots of planning.
I've hosted a number of these over the years, (That number is 167.) but I've never been this involved from start to now.
Wow.
Talk about lots of details. From format to food to prizes to draws to haranguing people to participate to hoping it doesn't piss rain on the tourney day.
Well all that has been done and now the event is here.
I can't say for certain, but thanks to a lot of very nice and generous people the theatre will bring in close to 70 thousand dollars today.
Not bad for our first time.
I'll update you on the hijinks and tom foolery later. Hopefully there won't be any fisticuffs or roughhousing.
That last sentence dropped by to say "Hi from 1956!"
Posted by Humble on June 25, 2007 @ 09:49|Permalink
In Toronto, yeah that's right...In Toronto baby.
Today I'll be on Rogers Cable's fine program In Toronto.
I was on a older version of this just before Christmas and then they stopped producing that show.
Yes another fine effort poisoned by my appearance. Nice.
I hope this group knows that I can have that effect on a show.
I'll be on talking about last months Deaf for a Day thing. I'm looking forward to it as the DfaD people are the best.
I'll let you know when it runs.
My LKTYP Golf Tourney is fast approaching. Monday June 25 at Glenn Abbey. If you'd like to come and your a single we can hook you up in a foursome. It's for a great cause, The Lorraine Kimsa Theatre for Young People, a nice group who do good things for kids.
Send you interest to I'llplayinyourtourney@Humblehoward.com.
Finally, last night I had some Baby Back ribs ripple potato chips. Wow. Those cats at Herr's know what they're doing. Taste great and only a ton of calories.
I wonder how they stumbled on Baby Back ribs as a chip flavor.
"Hey dude's I've got a great idea, how bout ham chips?"
"No you idiot. But pig is an interesting chip flavor. Hmmmm How about Baby Back rib ripple chips?"
"Wow no wonder your regional manager in charge of development."
I urge you to go out and purchase Herr's Baby Back ribs at your earliest convenience.
Do it.
Posted by Humble on June 21, 2007 @ 07:48|Permalink
NHL Draft day in only 2 more sleeps!
This Friday and Saturday the NHL draft is on in Columbus Ohio and I'm having trouble sleeping.
The Leafs are picking 13th. Hmmm an omen perhaps? Apparently Kyle Turris will be the first pick overall and I'm very happy for him.
Not so happy for the sports Radio and Television stations that have to cover the whole thing as though it matters to more than a handful of people.
Mostly guys who wear sweaters with the names of other men on the back.
John Daly won his second Telus skins game by holing a chip for eagle and collecting $190,000 dollars. Not surprised, the guys got Mad Skills, as the kid are wont to say.
I like John.
I hosted and was part of several skins games back when Export A sponsored them and I was lucky enough to hang with him a bit over 3 or 4 summers. Good guy, amazing with people.
At Tremblent he was playing with Weir, David Duval and Fred Couples and was by far the
fan fav. True Daly story #1.
John had just been picked up by Callaway and as he left the range one day he was signing autographs and started talking to a kid about 12 years old. He asked the boy if he golfed and if he had clubs. The kid said yes but I don't have a full set yet.
Daly bolts into the Pro Shop (ok, waddles quickly) and buys the kid a full set of Callaways.
Seriously. The kid is blown away.
I guarantee you that's not the first or last time Big John did that.
True Daly Story #2.
I was hosting a clinic with him for an event at Angus Glenn a few years later. He hit some balls and then after I asked him if I could try one of his clubs. He said yes and I grabbed his 8 iron and went off to the side of the range.
Stiffest shaft I've ever held. (I'm talking golf clubs here, relax.)
It took me three swings just to get the ball in the air.
True Daly Story #3
During one round at Angus Glen BJ apparently drank 17 Mike's Hard Lemonades. 17.
Most people would be dead.
Later that night I was hosting the dinner portion of the thing and John got up and sang some song on his guitar to the amazement/horror of those gathered.
How bad was it?
Many of us wished we were dead.
My buddy Tim Miller teaches and does it very well. I mentioned yesterday that he'd probably have a thing or two to say about the whole "How much is too much" homework thing. He did.
Check this perspective out from a very thoughtful teacher.
I know that homework is a necessary evil... 1) its preparation for life.
What kind of job do you not bring home on some level, either literally or in your brain. 2) there ain't enough hours in the day
No matter the subject, you can't always get everything covered. 3) self guided learning
You are never going to learn to think for yourself if the teacher always does the thinking (get a fish, you eat for a day...learn to fish, you eat for life) 4) lazy
Sometimes they goof off in class and its their own fault...I try give a fair amount of time to get a good chunk of work done during class time...like a real job...learn how to time manage now... waste it and its your own darn fault that you can't watch lost tonight because Mr Miller made you figure out the motivation for a character! 5) bad teacherrs
Yeah sure...there are a few out there that give too much time to "self guided" learning...they may not know how to teach that well...dunno 6) too much...too little time
...By cutting out Grade 13/OAC we have limited the amount of time that these kids get to learn
...add to that the fact that they have a reduced amount of choices...its important to balance your education with 'required' items and 'interest/passion' items...with a year less time to get your required courses, kids don't get that opportunity to balance and may miss out on directions they might peruse (Arts, Tech, Phys Ed...etc)
...as well, I think some are not quite mature enough (at 18) to head off to post-secondary places 7) we need to find a balance
Our society is WAY too stressed...some European countries start at 5 weeks off per-year when you begin a job...in North America you need to be in the system for a few years to get that...life needs to be a bit of work and a bit of play
Thanks Tim. He's the type of dude you hope your kids get in school
I've been trying to find the new Nike spot featuring the Nike golf team making a set of tiny clubs for Tigers baby. It's not on YouTube yet, but I'm sure it will be soon.
In the meantime here's the Father's day spot from last year.
Sadly, this Nike commercial was compiled a few weeks before Earl Woods' death and was meant to be Tiger's Father's Day tribute to "make sure all dads everywhere are recognized and appreciated." Just try and watch it without tearing up.
(After you've watch it, it kinda goes wonky. Just hit refresh and it'll reset.)
I wasn't really looking forward to Fathers Day this year. A lot of you know my Father, Lou Glassman, died last Fall and as this day approached I wondered how I'd feel on my first
Father's day without my Dad.
Well the answer is I feel fine. Really I do.
I decided that I would focus on what I have as opposed to what I've lost.
I have a great family including two amazing kids and a wonderful wife and I'm damm lucky.
(Not to mention Tiger is 2 back at the U.S. Open. My Dad would have loved that too.)
This morning my girls brought me breakfast in bed and homemade cards and cuddles and I knew that I'd be all right today.
I know I'll be thinking of my Dad but as time passes I feel a little less raw. I guess that's normal.
I'm starting to realize that I still have a Father, I just can't talk to him the same way as before. But trust me, I hear his voice and see him all the time.
With my Father and I it was always Golf. The way I put my hands on a club, all the things he taught me, all the etiquette and life lessons. All that's him.
When I' watch Tiger win today I'll know somewhere my Dad will be watching too...and complaining about the lack of TV time for Mike Weir and Stephen Ames!
I'll think of him after the broadcast and wonder what'd he say.
I'll think of him but it won't be as sadly as before.
Today I'll think of being a lucky Father as opposed to a Father-less son.
A couple of days ago I wrote about Bon Cop Bad Cop, my new favorite Canook movie starring Colm Feore. He may be this country's greatest dramatic actor. No he is.
He's been a bunch of stuff you've seen. IMDB him and you'll see.
My pal Viney Menon of the Star writes a nice thing in this morning's paper about Colm getting a big award.
BANFF - Colm Feore leans forward in his emerald chair and smiles.
A rustic, three-level chandelier hangs nearby, casting amber shadows on the Tudor balcony. Outside, fog sits atop the Rockies, mist drifts through pine trees in the Bow Valley.
We are inside the Banff Springs Hotel, a castle in the mountains. And this backdrop is appropriate: Canada's prince of a leading man framed by majestic beauty on the day he is crowned with a lifetime Award of Distinction.
Check out the rest of it here.
Posted by Humble on June 13, 2007 @ 09:18|Permalink
Bon Cop Bad Cop
Bon Cop Bad Cop.
Best Canadian movie I've seen.
Not saying it's the best Canadian movie ever, just I don't see that many and this one was good.
Rent/Download it and you won't be disappointed.
I watched this the other night and was very impressed. Had a real "Snatch" feel to it and a nice
Canadian flavor. (That last sentence assumes you know I mean the movie "Snatch"...)
Colm Feore is a great actor in any country and the French guy was good too. Plus some cool scenes, good story and 2 hot chicks.
Have a look.
I have a wife and 2 girls. That's a lot of chick-stuff hanging around the house.
From flip-flops to tank top to flat irons to bras the place is a veritable Vagina-Festival.
By the way, I thought girls were neater than boys. Hah! My oldest daughters room looks like a hurricane blew through it and most days we just shut the door so we won't have to look at it.
Of course there's the magazines.
Men today I draw your attention to Lou Lou.
Do you know Lou Lou? I do. Do you?
Lou Lou is your typical chick-mag. Lot's of ads, pictures of hot skinny women and amazing "articles."
How to dress for a blind date!(Comfort is key, stay natural and smile. Okay.) Buying a Bra-Great cleavage enhancers.(Hmmm cleavage.) Think Pink.(I am.) 374 Hot Buys and where to find them. (Are there really 374 hot buys? One day I may count them.)
The point is I know my wife reads these things which is fine but when I see the girls looking through them it give me the willies.
I remember when they use to color things and cut out stuff and now they reading articles about plumping up your lips with some new kind of gloss. (Lips can look up to 40% plumper!)
I love a plump-lip as much as the next guy I just don't want my little girls worrying about it yet.
Posted by Humble on June 7, 2007 @ 08:36|Permalink
Pilot Humour. Ha Ha.
My pal Bernie Marcotte sent me this. He's not a pilot but he loves to fly and often will send me stuff like this.
For reference here's a C-130
Here is an F-16
A C-130 was flying on a mission when a cocky F-16 pilot flew up
next to him.
The fighter jock told the C-130 pilot, "watch this!" and promptly
wentinto a barrel roll followed by a steep climb! He then finished with
a sonic boom as he broke the sound barrier.
The F-16 pilot asked the C-130 pilot what he thought of that.
The C-130 pilot said, "That was impressive, now watch this!"
The C-130 droned along for about 5 minutes, and then the C-130
pilot came back on and said , "What did you think of that?"
Puzzled, the F-16 pilot asked, "What the hell did you do?"
The C-130 pilot chuckled, "I stood up, stretched my legs, went to
the back, took a piss , then got a cup of coffee and a sweet roll!"
(Hah! that's a good one. You see the F-16 guy was all " what can you do" and the C-130 dude was like "Yeah, well watch me..." and well if I have to explain it....)
In a few weeks I'm speaking at a lunch thing in front of a bunch of people who are "in transition" Which is grown up for "NOT WORKING!"
I can relate. I've been in transition since last July.
've crafted a little speech and I'll be trying it out on these people to see if I can help them understand that it's not the end of the line but maybe the beginning of something great.
Mainly it's a way of saying your not alone.
Yesterday I wrote some bizarre stuff about being around the house and talking to my dog and I received this great comment about from Chris K in Grimsby.
He sums up the experience very well. (The out of work one, not the dog thing.)
Hey there Humble. I too have joined the ranks of the unemployed & I hate it! Interviewing is such a frustrating exercise too, as you continually have to repeat yourself over & over in a effort to prove how great you are at what you've done & how perfect you would be for them. In other words, do some shameless self promoting & kiss the ass of someone on the other side of the table whom you know is a lot less smarter than you are!
Sadly, I have no website to work on in my spare time or book to promote. I just play on the laptop waiting for the phone to ring and the right offer to come my way. The uncertainty of it all is frustrating & at times , scary. I'm also very bitter at having to prove myself again in the marketplace, after over 17 years in my field.
I had always felt badly for you in your situation, & now I'm living it too. They say everything happens for a reason, I just would like someone to provide that reason for me, with a big cheque to match.
At any rate, thanks for all the laughs Howard & I'll let you know how it turns up....more ints. this week , then I'm heading to Disneyworld for some R&R. I'd love to have a beer with you sometime, your bits have always been a great source of entertainment to me since your arrival here in 89.
All the best to you & the family.
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an
attractive woman waving at him.
She says hello. He's rather taken a back because he
can't place where he knows her from. So he says, "Do
you know me?"
To which she replies, "I think you're the father of
one of my kids." Now his mind travels back to the
only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and
says, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor
party that I made love to on the pool table with all
my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt
with wet celery???"
She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I'm
your son's teacher."
Posted by Humble on June 4, 2007 @ 18:09|Permalink
Monday Notes. Just some musings and left-overs.
My first meeting today is at 2pm. It's 1:30 and I've just had a shower. You know if I didn't have to get a job some day this is exactly how I'd live. Except for the ever-present fretting.
All morning long, I've been on the phone or on my computer dealing with:
A) LKTYP golf tournament stuff.
B) CIAS stuff.
C) GSIN stuff.
Did I actually accomplish anything?
D) Uh, no not so much.
Spent time harassing board members to sell foursomes, called around for some marketing items for the Air show and found out GSIN (Official plane of HHDotcom) needs a new hydraulic gear motor and power pack. Not good and not cheap.
Today I'm hearing a weird buzzing sound in my office.
"Vzzzzzzzzit. Vzzzzzzzit."
I called Randee in to see if she could hear it and of course it stopped.
"I have finally gone to my happy place," I thought.
Then I heard it again.
"Vzzzzzzzzit. Vzzzzzzit"
Ahah! it was coming from my hard drive. So like a typical guy I slammed my hand down on the top and the "Vzzzzzzzzit" was gone. Problem solved. Take that GeekSquad.
The following was an actual conversation between me and Tucker. He's our little slipper-humping dog and has become the Big Love of our family.
Me: "Who's a good boy? Are you the boy of boys? Yes you are. You're Daddy's boy."
Dog: Blank stare. Yawn. Nut-licking.
Me: "Are you licking your nuts? You are. Yes you're the nut-licking boy of boys. Your Daddy's little nut-licker."
Dog: More stares.
Me: Staring back.
Dog: "Hey dude, you really need to get out of the house earlier in the day!"
I've had a pretty full last 24 hours so I won't be putting anything up till around mid-day.
If I get swamped I may have to wait till Saturday.
Get swamped with what you say?
Hey, not having a job is taking up all my time.
Bewell,
h
Posted by Humble on June 1, 2007 @ 07:35|Permalink
Canada's Team of Destiny loses game 1.
What the hell happened? Ottawa barely showed up and lost game 1 against the Anaheim Mighty Ducks.
Oh come on. Can a team from Disney really win the Stanley Cup? I think not my good friends.
Actually I only saw the pre-game and the first goal during Soccer Dad's Wing night and then I barely remembered it was on.
Did you see the big-ass grin on Don Cherry's face when he was hanging with Arnie? He looked like a little kid.
Game Notes:
From what I read the 9 game layoff didn't help the Sens but they could have won if their 3 big guns played better. Besides Alfredson I couldn't name the other two if I were being held hostage.
That goalie dude sure looks like a nitwit crouching into the net during the anthem, that I do know.
Speaking of which, Stephen Stills sang horribly and looked like he had Alpha Getty stains on his shirt.
Lastly, come on Leaf Fans let's drop this petty posturing and get behind CTD (Canada's Team of Destiny) once and for all.
You can't tell me you hate the Senators so badly or you're so peeved because your team sucks, that you'd rather have a squad from "Cawli-fornia" win than a Canadian one. Seriously.
Or maybe you can.
Go Sens Go.
I've banged my Skull again. Why does that sound dirty?
I bashed my head again. Seriously. I have developed some sort of distorted spacial relationship issues with my head and blunt objects.
(Last Head-Bashing incident-I was too woozy to take pictures. This time same eye just above my eyebrow.)
Last time it was the edge of Dave Whites Mini-Cooper, this time it was the left-edge of the flap on GSIN.
I was getting the plane ready, stood up and banged my head so hard I went down on the ground like I'd been shot.
I put my hand up to my head and there was blood everywhere. I'm a good bleeder.
(How proud you must be. I am thank you.)
I was momentarily dazed and had to go clean myself up and fly to Kingston.(See Deaf for a Day Kingston.)
I don't know what it is but I seem to be getting Klutzier as I age.
Is this one of those Old Guy things.
"Oh don't worry about Granpa he's always banging his head on things, ha ha the old koot!"
I have always felt I was fairly co-ordinated but since we've owned this plane I have consistently banged my noggin on various parts of the aircraft.
This was the first to draw blood.
At the risk of looking stupid I may have to start wearing a helmet to fly, at least until I'm in the plane.
Many of you know that I worship Tiger Woods. He is the simply the best golfer ever and that includes Jack, Arnie, Bobby, Lee and a bunch of old guys that used to play with branches and balls made of leather.
I like Tiger because I've been playing golf since I was a kid.
My Dad used to chips balls and work on his swing in our backyard and I learned from him.
I became a pretty good player at one point and have always had an interest in the instruction of the game. I also got that from my Dad. He loved talking about the finer points of the golf swing and very few conversations we had over the years didn't include golf-talk.
"Hey Lou, we've just had a baby girl!"
"That's great, congratulations."
"Yeah, and I think I've finally figured out what I'm doing in my downswing."
This summer will be the first without my Dad to talk golf with and I'll miss that.
Anyway I'd thought I'd share some of my accrued golf instruction-BS with you. These have come from years of hitting hundreds of thousands of balls,(seriously) hundreds of hours of lessons and reading numerous books. And of course "Things I learned from Lou!"
So here we go with the first in our new series... HHdotcom's Easiest Golf Tips Ever.
1) Relax your hands and arms and let them hang down. Also strengthen your right hand grip-turn it clockwise-(if your a righty, left, if your not.) A stronger grip will feel funny at first but it will help you not slice...as much.
2) Play the ball further up in your stance-toward the target- and stand closer to the ball than you think you should. If your reaching too far to get to the ball you will do all sorts of things that will be no good. Topping, skulling, banana slicing. Sound familiar? Stand closer.
3) Swing at a pace wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy SLOWER than you think you should. Then slow it down again. One of the biggest mistakes you make is to swing too fast to let your natural co-ordination kick in. This is also one of the easiest things to fix.
Next time your on a range take a 7 iron and with a full swing, see how short you can hit it.
If you normally hit it 145 yards, try and hit it 75, but with a full swing. You will have to slow your motion down a lot and what you'll find is your ball contact will immediately get better and you'll start hitting in longer than normal.
Okay. That should be enough for now. I'll throw in a few more as the summer wears on. If you have any questions about your swing don't hesitate to ask.
Maybe this is what I should have been doing all these years!
Earlier this month I was part of the Toronto launch of Deaf for a Day. Check out the whole story if you like here .
Here are a few shots of that day. First I had to have my ears blocked.
(Actually looks like this nice person is trying to find something inside my head, a brain perhaps. A clue, maybe.)
Here's legitimate celebrity Michael Burgess.
(Pretty cool guy and not a bad singer.)
Finally, later on I visited a school and as you can see they kids were quite frightened.
(That's my deaf-buddy BJ , the school principal Rita and some very confused kids. "Why is that hideous man wearing big headphones?")
Tomorrow I'll be part of the Deaf for a Day activities in Kingston. I really had a great time doing it in Toronto and I'm sure it will be just as amazing in the K-town.(Yes the K-town.)
For more info on the Canadian Hearing Society and all the great stuff they do go here. Then come back of course.
Posted by Humble on May 25, 2007 @ 09:28|Permalink
Thom sent me this and It's not Bad.
My buddy Thom Roberts a big shot at DHL sends me this stuff all the time.
Some of it has to do with Boobs and things.
Some of it makes me laugh.
This is one of the latter.
And as many of you know I enjoy it when the content flows this a way.
Thanks TR.
A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years. He
breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young
couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair.
While tying the homeowners wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of
her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's
in there, the husband whispers over to his wife: "Listen, this guy is an
escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent a lot of time in
jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he
wants sex, don't resist, don't complain.....do whatever he tells you.
Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously
very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us
both. Be strong, honey. I love you!"
His wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear.
He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any
Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong. I love you,
too!"
Posted by Humble on May 23, 2007 @ 21:27|Permalink
Sorry for Content Crash.
Humble Howard Dot Com peeps.
Sorry for the content delay but my site's been screwing up one way or another for a couple of days.
I hope to have some freshly baked bon mots of fun for you all later tonight or tomorrow.
Thanks and hope you all had a great long weekend.
hh
Come on Toronto, isn't it time to get behind the Senators? Isn't it time to support an Ontario team that's just one win away from the Stanly Cup finals. Something an Ontario team hasn't done since people used to smoke in Hospital rooms?
I know this type of talk drives Leaf fans nuts. I feel bad for several of my best pals who love the Leafs and wished with all their hearts they didn't suck. But they do and that's a drag.
For years like you, I used to love watching the Leafs beat the Choke-Squad from our nationals capitol every spring. It was good times and special, happy days for all. But then the Leafs stopped making the playoffs and Ottawa stopped choking and losing and now it's just not as much fun anymore.
Winning a bunch of games can do that to the Leafs Nation.
The Senators are going to the Stanly Cup finals and the Leafs having been golfing for nearly a month.
Yes it will be painful to watch but maybe a team from this province will win the Cup again after 40 long, pathetic, ticket-price raising years.
Go Sens Go.
One of my best friends, Stinky, has a dog named Hogan. I'm his Dog-father and he is just about the most beautiful dog you've ever seen.
But what about your dog Tucker you say.
Ah, yes Tucker is not really a dog, he's more like a squirrel/cat/dog hybrid. He' my boy.
But Hogan, now Hogan is a Big Dog. He's a German short haired pointer with the most docile and sweet personality and recently he was profiled on a web site called The Daily Puppy.
These people are Puppy Freaks and they love the Hogan.
Check out the site here for the full Hogan profile and especially the comments.
In the meantime here's a shot of my Dog-Son. Stinky calls him monkey. Stinky is very strange.
(Just try not to say "Awwwwww hello Monkey, is that your rope?")
Posted by Humble on May 15, 2007 @ 09:18|Permalink
Going Away for some Flight Training.
For the next couple of days my buddy DW and I are going to a place near Pittsburgh for 2 days of intensive IFR training.
That's flying talk for just using the instrument of the plane. We're both IFR rated but we want to take it up a notch and spend some time in a simulator going through some emergency situations that you can't really replicate in the plane. Until they happen of course.
I want to also get some more "actual flying in cloud" experience.
Why is that such a big deal?
Well if your a pilot who's not IFR rated and you happen to wander into a cloud then its' Very Very Bad Jerry.
Think JFK jr.
If your an IFR rated pilot who's doesn't have a lot of experience, it's also not good.
Flying in and out of cloud safely is what I'm looking to learn to do.
For a little taste of IFR check this out.
Posted by Humble on May 10, 2007 @ 22:25|Permalink
Barry Gibbs lips produce Big Day for Visits here at HH Dot com.
Every day several thousand of you drop by here for a look-see and I thank you.
Thank you.
See I thanked you again.
Yesterday things went a little crazy in the Hits/Visits department and I couldn't figure out why.
Then I checked my stat generator in a category called "Visitor Paths." Basically the portal or entry door that people find your site.
For Regular Readers you probably just go to your favorites (I hope) and arrive directly. For others they might be googleing something and my site comes up. That's what happened yesterday.
Apparently I wasn't the only one who thought Barry Gibbs teeth, lips and shizzz-talking was weird.
Thousands of people were searching for the answers and my entry ranked very high.
In some cases if you Googled "Barry Gibbs Lip or Lips" my site ranked #2 or #3.
Which means a lot of people came here yesterday searching for the lowdown on his freaky upper lip which seemed to be non-existent.
The top searches on my site yesterday included.
Barry Gibbs lips.
Barry Gibbs upper lip.
Where are Barry Gibbs lips.
Barry Gibbs missing lip.
Potatoe Salad. Seriously someone was searching and hit my Potatoe Salad recipe
Anyway the fact is the dude had a little sompin sompin going on with his lip. So I googled it and found out his lip is shriveled-looking due to some old botox and his moustache is thinner than it used to be. So you now you know.
Of course he wasn't any where near as scary-looking as Kenny Rodgers when he showed up last year. (I've seen Kenny Rogers and you sir are no Kenny Rogers.)
Posted by Humble on May 10, 2007 @ 09:25|Permalink
Hey gang, it's your friendly neighbourhood 
